I need help getting over my routine negative self-talk.

Question

I have been suffering from a great deal of negative self-talk. I am always thinking worse case scenario, that I am limited in my life (i.e. that my girl will have an affair, that I can’t get out of debt), etc, etc, etc. I want to get rid of it and start really thinking and believing in a more optimistic positive way about the world but I have been finding it very difficult. And this has been going on for over 6-7 years. Does anyone have any advise???

Answer 1

in order to deal with negative self talk you must question your negative self talk, you must not let a new phrase enforce the idea without having a proof , suppose for example one of your friends totally ignored you one day and then you thought that this did so be because you are a looser, what are the clues that you have to proof that you are a looser? there are hundreds of possibilities that may have made your friend to ignore you today, maybe your friend was having a bad day and so was not in a mood to talk to someone else, maybe your friend didn't notice you today or maybe he/she was thinking about something that was taking his/her attention , why did you leave all the possibilities and just thought of you being a looser? its because of an irrational idea about yourself that you do hold.

what you must do is challenge irrational ideas and thoughts, you must not accept any idea except if there is a solid proof, in the previous example hundreds of possibilities were there so you can never take what happened as a proof. by questioning every negative self talk phrase you have you will be breaking the cycle of reinforcing irrational ideas and you may end up finding that your ideas was totally irrational and that you have no reason to feel bad ,this wont take a day or two but its going to be very effective if you did commit to it until positive thinking turns into a habit.

having positive self talk instead of negative is not that hard, you just need use a method called CBT(cognitive behavior therapy), this method will help you to control your thoughts and your negative self talk, this will in turn lead to weakening the irrational ideas until they are removed.

building self confidence is another thing that will help you eliminate the root cause for the irrational ideas, after all the irrational ideas are not causes,they are results, build your self confidence now and free yourself from those irrational ideas.

Answer 2

You need to fast from wrong thinking! There is a whole series on this at Gregory Dickow's site.

Answer 3

Hi: Cut down on the news on tv n radio..get your eating habits corrected..take a look at other peoples problems that are much worst than your own..get a spritual adjustment...Use more humor in your everyday conatcts with people..Smile to yourself in the mirror each morning...Hang around people who are motivated...Be self-confident and focus on your work and not your GF..get a hobby...listen to music you can understand and isn't harsh on the ears..Drink Milk..have a good day..

Answer 4

As a man thinks in his heart so is he. Would you put corn in the ground and expect peas?