I need help with my 4 year old?

Question

my 4 year old daughter has started school this year,she is a hand full doesn't listen, does what she pleases,back answers,i dont know what to do she talks like an 18 year old teen ......I do what i can to entertain but i guess it only works for an hour what can i do ???

Answer 1

You can set boundaries for her. It is time to step up your punishment. Take away toys, privileges, dessert, TV, etc... until she gets it. You are the parent and you are bigger than she is. Just put your foot down and let her know who is boss.

Answer 2

I think I am just not able to relate to children at this stage.  My five year old is starting Kindergarten in the fall, and it sounds like you and I have the same kid.  However, I think that Nate's problem behavior began after his baby brother was born. He just doesn't want to share Mommy and Daddy's attentions, and so he acts out in order to get some attention, while WE are expecting him to be the "big boy" example for Zack to follow.  

Having said all that,  my advice is just love her.  She's a human person, a little piece of you, and she just wants love.  When she pushes your buttons, just wait quietly in another room until she realizes that you aren't paying attention to her antics, and she'll come to you for love and attention.

Good Luck!

Answer 3

first of all god bless u i have a grandaughter who will be turning 4 soon,and she is also a hand full,u have to remember u are the parent,and u are not her friend.you have to set boundaries,and make sure she understands what is expected of her if she is just starting school,she,s probably so scared that she is not going to respond well to other,s telling her to do things on a command.as all parent,s have probably had the same problem,s,letting go,but if u have the time get involved,just because she is in school,doesnt mean u cease being her mom,drop in talk to her teacher,and maybe read a book to all the children,when a parent shows up,and does activitie,s with their children it helps them to belong,it also alleiveate,s their fear of being seperated ,also u let her know u are going to be a part of her new life.also let her see u interacting with her teacher,that let,s her know,that u trust the invironment she,s in,and she will have more confidence,and will see that she,s not going to be alone.it helped my son who is now 34yrs old,succesfull,and happy.im not saying i have the right answer,im just saying it worked for me.

Answer 4

She is in the habit of getting her own way after years of bad parenting, and you are not going to change that overnight.

And people need a licence to have a dog?

Answer 5

I would talk with the teacher and ask if there re any children in the class you have beenn pciking on her, playing with her etc, so tht way you know what happens at school and if she is picked on, you can tackle the behaviour from there.

If she swears, I would ignore her until she started talking nicely. That way, she learns that its not acceptable and we need to use nice words to each other

Answer 6

She is 4 years old? You are the adult she is the child- you do not argue with a child- your word is law and you should only tell her one time to do something- to punish put a circle on the wall and have her put her nose on it- time out means a chair a hard plastic one facing a wall- and  you do not give in- I never yelled at the kids ever- I spoke in a very low voice where they had to strain their ears to listen to me- yelling means that you have lost control and they have won---  this has worked for me - I do not believe in hitting a child, but I do believe in spanking the bum, if the child gives attitude- if you do not get control now, you will not have it when she is older and that is when you need it--- you might want to get books on how to deal with a bratty child, they will help-

Answer 7

No more Hannah Montana.

Answer 8

Good ol' spankin!

Answer 9

I also have a 4 year old daughter that has a mind of her own!  I broke down in tears the other day because she just does not see the significance of respecting me.  I have been spanking her and it is just not helping.  I would suggest make some ground rules that you are willing to fight for and having a serious talk with her.  My requirements are very basic: eat dinner with the family and clean your room.  She did not do either last night and I grounded her from her movies for 2 days.  Tonight she cleaned her room and sat at the table without too much of a fuss.  You are not there to entertain your child.  Of course, you should do things with her each day, but she should entertain herself for the most part.  I really think it is just the age.  I have been racking my brain trying to figure out what I have been doing wrong and I have yet to come up with something significant.  She probably does not act that way towards other adults.  That is when I think you would have a real problem on your hands.  It's not easy to be the mother of a 4 year old girl.

Answer 10

My little one is 7 now, but we had the same problem when she was about that age.  We just started talking to her normally and explaning what she has done wrong and why it was wrong.  She is never bad, she was just acting bad.  

Remind her bad behavior gets punishments but good behavior makes it easier or everyone and therefor more able to get treats and go fun places.  Never give her something just because she is good.  It has to be is she has been good for a while.

You can also look into a child psychologist.  There may be something else there cuasing this.  I'm not saying medicate her, its not always the answer, but talking and getting to the bottom of this may help.

In the end it may be a phase she has to go through and when she comes out of it you will see it will be ok!

Good luck!

Answer 11

take everything out of her room except her bed. that should do it.

Answer 12

she listens -she can't help it cuz  you're always talking to her.  learn how to listen to your daughter.  she needs you to talk WITH her, not at her.  model good behavior & respect and reward hers.  ignore negative behavior.

Answer 13

try star charts spilt in to times before school after school after tea then bed time a sticker if shes good and a big black cross if she is rude then she gets something nice if she has more star then crosses at the end of the week,  also a time -out chair works well if she rude sit her on it for 3 Min's but important to make sure you talk to her and explain what shes done wrong good luck

Answer 14

An hour attention span is great for a kid her age. You have got to start and uncompromising discipline plan. If she doesn't listen, she goes to time out. If she does what she pleases and you told her not to, she goes to time out. If she back answers, she goes to time out. If she talks like an 18 year old teen, she goes to time out. And you aren't responsible for entertaining her. Play with her some every day, but also set toys out and let her entertain herself.

Answer 15

Why is she at school? She is only four.

Answer 16

Talk to her teacher and see what yall can work out..maybe she doesnt need to go until she is 5 or 6. She will get better at school and listen.