I need help with my job. Please answer! I'm in tears!

Question

Well, I'm fifteen and I work at a place that does birthday parties for little kids. I absolutely love it! But the problem is that it's all teenage girls. My best friend works there too. I'm a really shy person and it takes a long time for me to be comfortable with people. So when my best friend isn't there, I'm really quiet and don't really talk to the girls. I thought they didn't like me. But apparently they told our boss that they thought I didn't like them and that I had attitude. I really want to try and be more friendly with them. Does anyone have any methods that will help me come out of my shell? Please, I'm in tears.

Answer 1

i agree with sunshine. but take it easy and don't let it be so stressful for you. you can do it!

Answer 2

just slowly start talking to them and tell your boss what's going on.

Answer 3

just do it.  if your job is worth it to you, just force yourself to be more open.  talk to the girls and tell them that you are shy but trying.

Answer 4

Quiet people are often mistaken for being stuck up. This is what worked for me. On your way to work next time talk yourself up. Tell yourself that you are going to be out going and think of things to talk about. Since you work with kids comment to the other coworkers "Look how cute she is" or "I hope to have a boy when I'm older"...things that you can relate to other people.

This works it just takes some courage. I know how hard it can be trying to come out of your shell. Talk to the boss and explain to him/her what is going on. Maybe they can help.

Answer 5

talking is the best method to confront people.  you are shy, that's your side of the story.  

but to others it comes out with an attitude, maybe cuz you dont smile when you are with them, or say hi or bye, asking someone how are you doing goes a along way.  you don't have to tell them you are shy, just say hi, how are you, how was your weekend, anything interesting going on? blah blah blah.....just ask couple of questions, don't need to share your life story with them. just hi hello.... good luck, they wont bite :)

Answer 6

Wow! I feel for ya.  I used to be the same way.  At least you know why the other girls are stand-offish with you (and visa-versa).

My advice:  don't try to pretend to be a more outgoing person.  Shy quiet types can still be friendly and fun to be around.  Think about how you talk with your best friend.  How do you start up a conversation?  What kinds of things do you talk about.  When you're around the other girls listen and notice what they talk about. That way you can learn about things that interest them.  It might be you have common interests that you can talk about.

You could even start off by saying, "you know, I'm really shy and sometimes people think I don't like them, but I do.  ...".  You could even compliment them (but be sincere) like "I really admire the way you work with the kids...", ask them to assist you in a project, or something like that.

Maybe you could get your boss to help "break the ice" by working with you and one of the other girls on a common task where the two of you get a chance to interact more.

Start slowly and bit by bit you'll find it easier to talk with people of all types.  Some people are more natural at this than others but it's a skill we all develop over time.  And unless you never plan on working with people in the future it's good to start learning to how to talk with people.  Yeah, you could quit this job but you'll have missed out on a wonderful opportunity to grow (even though it might seem like it now :-)

I hope things look up for you!

Answer 7

Try complimenting one of them, but only if it's honest.  If you like one of their tops, tell them how good they look in it.  If there is a conversation going on, see if you can add to it.  Are they talking about something you know about?  Then join in.  Somebody has to make the first move.  It is not uncommon for people to think that someone is stuck-up when they are really just shy.

Answer 8

i have the same problem. first apologize to them, and tell them u weren't giving attitude u r just shy, and u might want to tell ur boss 2. be friendly with them, and ask them stuff. u might have the same interests. if they seem more comfortable with you invite them to hang out, go shopping, or head to the movies. I think it will get better/