I need help writing/editing a poem!! Please!

Question

Ok. so I'm trying to write a poem here. And I've realized...I suck at it!!

I've basically got key ideas written down and then squeezed something in here and there that I thought might rhyme. Anyways, my point is, it sounds very cheezy, unoriginal, and sloppy!! And I need help making it beautiful..... Anyone with poetry talent? Take a swing at it...Toss the words and sentences around and see what you get. Please!!!

I've lived my whole life knowing that one day I'd find someone

But I never thought I'd feel this way

I've never felt this way before

No one else makes me feel the way you make me feel

I get so happy I could cry

I couldn't figure out why I felt this way

No matter how much I tried to walk away

I knew it would catch up with me someday

I don't really know what stopped me before

But it didn't stop me from coming back for more

Because good things rarely happen to me

And when they do I think they're too good to be true

I knew that one day I would figure this out

And I could never let anything make me doubt

Though this past little while has been a bit rough

And just as I felt I had had enough

I realized the answer was right in front of me

That it was you all along

Why I am what I am

Why I do what I do

Baby I love you

Strange that I never noticed you before

Then one day you're standing outside my door

Heavenly Father really did make you stand out for me

You're everything I ever thought you could me

He's the one that led me to you

And kept leading me to you

It was only then that I realized

It was you all along

Why I am what I am

Why I do what I do

Baby I love you

Thanks!!!

Answer 1

Leave your poem as it is. I think it is beautiful. People who take your work and move it around make it their poem then, not yours. Trust me. I am a published poet and it is a masterpiece of the heart.

Answer 2

Beautiful poem

this poem is about being someone special

there are emotions like I now understand

to realizing that nothing could hold you back

It is about love

because of I love you

The first line I lived my whole life

or I've lived my whole life

I'am so happy I could cry

or

I'm so happy I could cry

I knew it would be one day it would catch

  

Answer 3

I've lived my whole life knowing that one day,

I'd find someone

But I never thought I'd feel this way

No one else makes me feel the way you make me feel

I get so happy I could cry

I couldn't figure out why I felt this way

No matter how much I wanted to walk away

I knew it would catch up with me someday

I don't really know what stopped me before

But it didn't stop me from coming back for more

Because good things rarely happen to me

And when they do,

I think they're too good to be true

I knew that one day I would figure this out

And I could never let anything make me doubt

Though this past little while has been a bit rough

And just as I felt I had had enough

I realized the answer was right in front of me

That it was you all along

Why I am what I am

Why I do what I do

Baby I love you

Strange that I never noticed you before

Then one day you're standing outside my door

Heavenly Father really did make you stand out for me

You're everything I ever thought you could me

He's the one that led me to you

It was only then that I realized

It was you all along

Why I am what I am

Why I do what I do

Baby I love you

I like this poem alot but I fixed a few gramical errors and repeated sentences like verses:

But I never thought I'd feel this way

and

I've never felt this way before

mean the same thing. so let me you how that helped you out.

[e-mail]

THX!

Answer 4

It's not cheesy at all! The best poems are written from the heart - it's all about the quality of the message.