I need help!i just had a baby 5 days ago and my neighbor wants to come over and see her.the problem is she?

Question

stinks.shes not the cleanest person in the world. im not trying to be mean but i would rather her not hold my little girl.her fingernails are always so dirty and her two kids run around looking like they havent taken a bath in a week.she will wear the same clothes for three sometimes four days in a row.thats just disgusting.how do i tell her that she stinks and she cant hold my baby?? anyone please help

Answer 1

Tell her that the doctors have advised that only family see her because she is only small and could easily catch diseases etc. Tell her that when your baby is 1 month/6 months old she can. Or only show her the baby when it is in a pram so that she cant take her out.

Answer 2

Just tell her for now that you need to settle in and don't want visitors for while. Or you just tell her to take a shower and wash her hands before she comes by. It may hurt her feelings but someones got to tell her. If you guys are real friends it shouldn't be that bad.

Answer 3

let her come over and if she asked to hold the baby tell her that you don't want to disturb her cause you want her to sleep.  a little white lie never hurt anyone right?  

Answer 4

i had my baby a few weeks ago , and EVERYONE wanted to come see the baby the week i got back from the hospital.

i had neighboors that i didnt even know about, who came over.  and it did bother me that some were maybe sick, or didnt wash their hands.

so i just kept my baby in my arms, and showed them ... and said things like : i cant let go of my baby.... or i made sure i was the one feeding him.

and the neighboor isnt familly, she wont insist on holding it. they are so small , most ppl dont feel confortable holding a baby that young

Answer 5

Just say your busy, or just tell her you are making every one wash their hands before touching the baby.   You have to protect your child and if your not comfortable with your neighbor holding your child then there is nothing wrong with that.

Answer 6

Just play the paranoid new mom card.  I have a friend who wouldn't let anyone hold her son for the first two months because she wanted to give his body time to build up all the proper immunities.  Yeah, we thought she was crazy, but hey, she's the mom, her rules.  Just tell her you're concerned about letting people handle her until her body has a chance to get stronger.  

Answer 7

If she really is too dirty, you might lie to her and tell her that your baby has a weak immune system.  Really, I wouldn't worry about it too much though, so long as you are breastfeeding - if your immune system is strong, then the antibodies your body puts in your milk will be able to protect your baby.

Answer 8

Explain to her your house rules, your babys health is YOUR # 1 PRIORITY, not your neighbors feelings, let her know to clean herself or else she can't come. If she is a real woman she should understand, some people don't know how bad their habits are until someone brings it to their attention, you never know if may change her life for the better!

Answer 9

You could tell her you don't feel comfortable letting anyone hold the baby yet.  You could also wrap the baby in a blanket and then if she does hold her just remove the blanket and wash it after she leaves.  

Answer 10

Are you two friends?  Hang out regularly?  Are you worried about offending her?

If you aren't friends and don't care about offending her, tell her she can only come over if she takes a shower because you're worried about your child getting sick.  Also, in my experience, people are much more forgiving of new parents who act a little crazy so she probably won't hod it against you.

Answer 11

Have your baby sleeping at the time the woman comes over. Then say, I'm sorry but she is sleeping right now, and she has not slept yet since we got home! Let's go look at her.

So like imply that you NEED her to sleep, then the woman will not pick up or touch your baby.

Good Luck!!

Answer 12

Just tell her you don't feel comfortable letting anyone holding the baby yet....or have her come over when the baby is sleeping ..this way she can't pick her up...i hate people like that! My neighbor is liek that too, that's why i don't even associate with her. lol

Answer 13

I would just tell her that you are not up to company just yet and when you are feeling like it you will let her know. Or you could (when the doctor tell you can drive again) let her know somehow that you are going out and let her see the baby, just make sure she is in her infant carrier and you are getting ready to get in the car to leave.

Answer 14

Tell her you're not ready yet. You don't feel up for visitors but you will definitely get ahold of her when you're ready. Once your baby is a little older and has a stronger immune system, then it's more feasible to let this dirty woman come over and see the baby. Doctors say that it's bad to keep your baby away from all germs because fighting germs at an early age helps the baby's immune system, so maybe it'll be a good thing!

Or you could just let the woman come over when you're in the middle of giving a bath. No one wants to hold a wet baby.

Answer 15

Just tell her that Dr. said that none should take the child in hands unless its needed...

and mostly to be done by the mother only...

Answer 16

Put out some antibacterial soap and tell her she has to use it first and let her know it's not just her, everyone does.  Or, if you can play it off well, act really paranoid about people touching her.

Answer 17

just tell her that the baby needs to adjust to your home and it would be better for the baby to just rest without company coming over.

Answer 18

As far as her kids being dirty, running around, now you know what you are in for:)  

Just ask her to shower and come in clean clothes before she comes over.

Answer 19

put the baby for a nap and tell her she wakes easily

pretend the babies sick (kind of sick i know, but you gotta do it)

tell her the doctor told you that the baby can't be held in arms for health reasons

make up an excuse that sounds beleivable

Answer 20

Number one you have a right not to show your baby to anyone for a month...shes new to this world and her system is very delicate if she can't respect that..oh well..and if she's a nasty person THEN THAT'S A DEFINITE NO...when the babies immune system builds up that's a different story! She's a newborn..your newborn, advise her of that and let her know you prefer that she doesn't have outside contact right now...and that she's to young...she can't get mad cuz it's your baby..and if she does she has some problems! I had to put people in there place many times with my children...there not just cute and cuddly and when there newborns you must be very protective!

Answer 21

Make an excuse, such as I and the baby are not up to visitors just yet. The Doctor advised  some quiet time for our new Family.

Answer 22

If you are not comfortable with her holding your baby, do not give her the baby to hold. Simply tell her that you are not ready for the baby to be exposed to others at this time and that you are spending time with the baby bonding and getting to know each other and that you are not ready for visitors. If she gets upset, oh well...your baby, not hers. You have to do what you need to do to protect your daughter. If that means upsetting someone else, too stinkin bad.

Answer 23

well, there is no easy way to do it, and you may just have to come right out and tell her.  i've had to deal with some problem neighbors before and it is never easy.  but you have to think about your babies health and welfare too.  you have to decide what is better, hurting your neighbors feelings or keeping your baby healthy.

Answer 24

haha. well, there's always the" i'm out going out of town tomorrow. but, since your neighbors she knows thats a lie.

let her come over and hold her for about 5 minutes then say" well its time for your nap little missy." and take her upstairs and when your neighbor leaves give her a little wipe down.

once she's seen it she is satisfied

Answer 25

I have found most people will not ask to hold your baby unless they are family or real good friends, a neighbour doesn't qualify.  If she does ask though, just tell her that you are limiting contact with your baby for the first month until she/he has built up some more immunities, tell her your sorry and not trying to be rude but this is what has been decided.  I would imagine she would take it gracefully and if she doesn't, oh well.  You are right for wanting the best for your baby.

Answer 26

You shouldn't have people come over too much anyway, do you know why?  Well right now your baby has no immunity to colds and diseases and is prone to catching sicknesses from others.  So, you can tell her this and that you need to keep you baby isolated for awhile.  This way you are being truthful and not hurtful.

Answer 27

Tell her the child is to young to meet anyone new, also she is very sensitive and has a weak immune system and can catch a cold very easily and this could be deadly.

Sorry if I'm no help I'm not a parent.

Answer 28

If your friends, and you don't want to insult her, let her hold your kid. It's not like being smelly and dirty is contagious. Your child wont contract some disease because your dirty neighbor held her. Just put up with it for five minutes, and then bath your child when she leaves.  

Answer 29

Tell her that you are busy or that you do not feel comfortable letting anyone touching your baby right now. She doesn't have a choice but to respect your wishes. Good luck to you mommy and congrats!

Answer 30

Don't let her hold your baby when she visits.....if she asks if she can hold you baby say that you are nervous bout that since she is a new born, just don't let her hold you baby!

Answer 31

Let her in to see the baby during a nap, just crack the door open, and let her have a quick peek, for a minute, then shut the door and smile.