I need some help with how to confront my dance teacher...?

Question

I go to this dance school, and I'm one of the older ones, I'm not the best dancer there, but the girl who is (who happens to be my best friend) very rarely turns up to the practices, even though she's the main part.

I just want to let my dance teacher know that me and some of the other girls are finding it a bit unfair that this girl always gets the main part even though she barely ever turns up to dance class.

How do I do this without sounding hugely jealous?!!

Answer 1

do it, just say i dont think its fair that ____ gets to do the part. She hardly ever comes to practice, and its not fair, i am not sayig (you) i should get it, just one of the other girls that always comes!

she may be related, tatented..... i dance to at Ritas dixon Dance Studio and i am related to rita, and i usuly get good parts, but there are some stuff i cant get, like our miss persionality award. But its fine wit me...good luck =]

Answer 2

It's difficult, but you can do it.

I would ask your dance teacher if you could speak with them in private after class. When it's just the two of you, calmly explain the situation in the most mature way that you can.

For example: "I don't want to make this a problem, but it's something that was concerning me that I figured I should discuss with you. Some of the other girls and I feel it's really unfair that although *friend* never comes to practice, she still gets the main part in the performance. I feel that because the rest of us are more dedicated, even if we aren't as talented, should be rewarded for our effort. The fact that she doesn't participate is making us feel a little bit discouraged and I'm afraid our performance is slipping because of it. Is there anything you can suggest that would help the situation?"

That makes it sound like you're more concerned about your own work than you are about her lack of work, which is the way to approach the situation. If she accuses you of being jealous, then calmly explain to her that you understand why the decisions were made but feel like the responsibilities aren't being taken care of.

It's important that everyone on a team feels validated and accepted, even if they aren't the "star player". Also, you could ask your friend why she doesn't come to practice as much as she should. Perhaps she has a very simple and logical reason.

Don't be afraid of expressing yourself to your instructor. This is an activity that should be fun, not stressful!

Good luck and stay strong!

Answer 3

If you don't feel so comfortable then have one of the girls who agree with you tell her. Or just come out and say you know it bothers me because she is one of the main people and shes not even here thats pathetic

Answer 4

Thumbs up to Olivia.

This, by the way, wouldn't even come up among guys. It's a female cultural thing. If she's the best dancer, she gets the best part. End of story.

If she were your friend, but even if not, it's absurdly immoral to undermine the top dancer for your own personal gain. Fairness is not in play but a psychological defense mechanism you're using as an excuse to do what you know in your heart you shouldn't do. And why not sound jealous? You are. It's also more than a little arrogant of you to think you should be able to dictate to the teacher what her criteria should be for picking who gets what part. It isn't as if her picking the best is an unreasonable position.

Answer 5

go with your friend to the teacher and say to her that maybe every time other girl do the main part because all the girls can, or that dont be a main part at all because it little unfair

Answer 6

You don''t do it...

You show your teacher that you deserve the parts by working harder and becoming just as excellent and great as that other girl with poor attendance...

Yes it is unfair, but it happens all the time in the professional world and you can't go whining to the artistic director that so and so doesnt deserve whatever it may be... You work hard and you'll be the one in the spotlight...

Good luck

:D

Answer 7

i think u shouldnt do it..its better if u work hard on ur moves nd show tht ur as good as d gal with poor attendance(maybe better than her...)..all d best

Answer 8

just let it slide in class but on stage "accidently" shove her to the abck before the lights come on!

haha

thats what i would do

Answer 9

I know it's unfair, but it's unprofessional to confront a teacher with this kind of problem.  It's like complaining because you don't have a solo.  The teacher knows best about what she wants to do with her class.  Believe me, she is less likely to do something about this problem if you say something than not; she will notice if you're unprofessional and confront her.  Her reaction to you confronting her is most likely to be something along the lines of "How dare you?  Go back to your position."  She won't take you seriously.

That being said, I understand your pain and the best thing you can do right now is become.  If you want that part, or if you think it's unfair, honestly, the best thing you can do is be professional.  Your friend who doesn't show up is being ungrateful and unprofessional with her part.  Teachers notice.  And if you follow these steps, your teachers will think of you very highly:

FOLLOW CLASSROOM ETIQUETTE.

In case you need a refresher on etiquette, the basic things are: show up on time, be prepared for class, go to the bathroom before, bring your water into class, bring your own small rock of rosin into the class so you don't keep dashing out, stay through the entire class or don't come at all (in other words, don't leave in the middle), don't chew gum, eat, or drink anything that's not water, and be respectful to the teacher.  Always, always, always have your hair in a neat bun.

DON'T BE A HYPOCRITE.

Do exactly what your friend doesn't: show up on time and every week.  If you're too sick, call into the dance studio and tell them you won't be there.

IMPROVE YOUR TECHNIQUE.

Become the best in the class.  After all, the reason the teacher chose this girl is because she's the best.  If you're the best AND professional, this girl is no match for you.

UNDERSTUDY!!!

Possibly the best way to be noticed as a serious and professional dancer is to understudy parts, especially without being asked.  Be sure you know everyone's parts so that if they're throwing up one day, you can automatically fill in for them.  Learn the choreography and the music that goes with it.  Your teacher will notice and most probably comment.  Don't be show-offy, just plainly tell her that you're understudying the part.  Don't elaborate the point (in other words, don't start justifying yourself like, "I'm understudying the part because it's the most professional thing to do, and if she's sick then I can fill in for her.").  The teacher doesn't need justification or explanation; they should know what understudying is for.  They will be pleased by your work ethic.  Your teacher is definitely more likely to consider you for the part if you understudy.  I can't stress that point enough.

Hopefully I've given you a satisfactory answer.  Feel free to contact me if you have further questions.♥