My ex-wife called me the other night. She eventually broke down and told me she is having some problems and just can't cope very well anymore. I have had my own battles with mental health, so she knew I would be sympathetic to how she feels. She has been drinking daily, blacking out several times a month. She smokes pot daily as well. She works in a resturant and has been hanging out with a morally "relaxed" crowd for a few years. Obvious changes in her personality and lifestyle began to occur when she started working in that industry 5 years ago. We are seperated (3 years) with divorce pending in a few months. She has a boyfriend in CA (over 2000 miles away) who she sees about 1 week each year. She cheated on this guy recently with another (drinking buddy) and dumped him since she felt guilty about cheating on the CA boyfriend. That's 3 guys in less than 3 years who she's slept with and essentially used to her advantage. She says she is worried about her attitude towards men and that she feels like she has a problem with really being in love or being attached to a guy. Ultimately she is selfish in her motives regarding relationships. Her self esteem is terrible and she seems to be self-destructing to some degree. I personally believe her sexual abuse experience (molested by her 6 year old cousin when she was 5) as a child has a lot to do with it. What can I do to help her...are there any resources for these types of problems? Are these symptoms of a specific mental disorder? She is mother to my daughter, so I can't ignore this issue.
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