I need to know how to do telekinesis, remote viewing and chi balls?

Question

Okay, I've got a great idea for a practical joke to play on my friend. But first I need to learn how to remote view into his house, then use telekinesis to move some things around. I also want to hit him with a chi ball and then appear as a shadow person before shape-shifting into a bat and flying off. I know that people can do this, will somebody please tell me how? I mean really tell me how? I can keep a secret.

Answer 1

You need to seek the 300 year old monk who lives on top of a forgotten mountain in Tibet. He is totally into those kind of pratical jokes.

Answer 2

If your serious about this stuff, I'd suggest self-training on opening your third eye. This is where our psychic abilities are stored. Once opened you can train your mind to do all these things you want. Do web searches on "Opening third (3rd) eye". There are very good sites available.

Warning if you are wishing to misuse it: alot of weird s**+T could happen.

Answer 3

omg and me too i wanna learn how also its soo kewl i wanna learn how too do powers like that

Answer 4

Good satire young squire!

Answer 5

Dude - you are funny.  But aren't you worried that someone will assume you are serious and report your proposed mischief as a potential terrorist invasion?

I'm still laughing at your question.  ROFL

Answer 6

Of all of those, the only one I can do is remote viewing, and honestly? if you're meant to do it, it will happen of it's own accord. I cannot teach you. I mean, I could tell you how to do it, but it wouldn't get you anywhere if you don't have the ability. Those that try to force psychic ability very often find Pandora's box.