Anyone know why she's hot and cold with me for apparently no reason?
We were an item for about 4 months earlier this year and i loved her and being with her, but she ended it as she felt I was pushy and clingy. We went on a break before the end, but i didn't know if it was a break or a break up, so after a month i tried to see what was happening. she revealed that she was tired and upset because of work. Her work comes first, and she didn't want the hassle of a BF as well as working long hours as a nursery nurse.
i was devastated, but she was right, and we stayed friends at my request. i didn't expect anything else to happen between us, and apart from just doing 'friend' stuff, we didn't go down the path of flirting or anything that would confuse the situation, just a pair of good mates.
until part way through last week, where she let me know that ''all the feelings i had 4 u are coming back and i think I've noticed babe''. i went to see her and ask what she meant, and it turned out that she had fallen for me again, but didn't want to act on them right away.
I was a more than a bit confused as you might imagine, by now i'd resigned myself to not being with her so i'd cooled right off and was only contacting her once every couple of days, or whenever she texted me. I was happy though, and asked her to let me know when she did want more from me. The next few days were fab, she text several times a day and quite flirty when we were on MSN too. In person she was back to being affectionate as when we were together, holding hands, hugging and cuddling, but no kisses. During all this time i wasn't anywhere near as clingy or pushy, i made some decisions on where to eat but she did most of the leading. she even commented on how much of a changed man i was!
At the end of the week she went out into town with her mates as it was her friend's leaving do. I wasn't invited as I don't know a lot of her mates, and I had some terrible man-flu, and she regularly has nights out without me (as well as some with me too). When I'm not there, she texts me every 3 or so hours, but that night i got 2 texts, one to say bye as she was leaving her place to meet her mate, and one about midnight asking if i was feeling better.
the next day, she was really quiet with me. she spoke to me on MSN, but was very distant - if i said something, she'd reply 5-10 mins later. i put it down to being tired or something, and when we texted that night, she said everything was great with us, and looked forwards to the next weekend (we were supposed to have a picnic in the local park with her young nieces).
Last night online, and she was distant again. This time it was half an hour before she replied to my message on MSN. i asked her if something happened when she was out, she said nothing did. i asked her if i had upset her, or i had (or hadn't done something), and although she said it wasn't anything i had done, she didn't say what it was. i asked her if the feelings she had for me (as recently as last week) and she said they were, ''they are still there a bit''.
If I'm honest with myself, i think something did happen at the weekend. In the past she's said that she's gotten drunk and snogged random guys (before she met me) but when i asked her casually how drunk she got after her last night, she said she didn't really get drunk at all and came home early because of being tired.
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actually, thinking through everything and reading what i've just written, it all makes sense to why she's being hot and cold. she wants the benefits and attention of a BF without the feeling of being tied down to one guy.
I think she's met someone and its turned her head upside down about me, and she doesn't know how to act around me now.
i realise i'm being made to look like a mug here, and i'd appreciate your opinions of what i should say and do about her. Should i stick around, back off or something else?
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