I posted this question in children & grade school, but I also want to post it here because I need to know?

Question

what to do by tomorrow!!!?????

I have a meeting with the school principal tomorrow at 1PM. What are my rights? Read details....?

My son is under treatment for Encopresis & I called the school to ask about Home Bound. They told me that Home Bound was generally for kids who were so sick they could not leave the house. But I've heard from others that kids w/ Encopresis have been approved for Home Bound. (Encopresis is a condition where the bowels are so stretched out that he has bowel movements in his pants up to several times a day) I know they are going to try to convince me to send my son to school w/ this condition because the principal already told me he'd be willing (or the counselor or nurse) to change my sons pants. I do not want to put my son through this! I'm also considering Home Schooling for one more year until he's "cured." What are my rights or any other options available? They told me I will be meeting w/ the principal, school psychiatrist, person in charge of Home Bound and one other person, but I can't remember who.. I feel very intimidated to talk w/ this many people.

Additional Details

6 minutes ago

BTW, bringing my husband would not be much help either because he is not totally supportive of my decision, but is allowing me to do this.

7 minutes ago - 3 days left to answer. - 1 answer - Report Abuse

You can't answer your own question.

Answer 1

I am sorry to hear that your husband is not completely supportive, that has to be hard, since every parent wants the best for their child.

You have been given several great answers, I agree with holding your ground; you are the parent; you decide not the schools.

The schools are there to provide a service for you, and your family.

The schools need to meet your needs not the other way around.

If it was me,  I would cancel the meeting, and say, "thank you for your time, but I will take it from here".

Blessings, and good luck.

Answer 2

Check the laws where you live. While you may not be able to force Home Bound, you can definitely homeschool. Find a local homeschooling support group, either on the web or specifically in Yahoo Groups, find out about the laws and the whole procedure of switching him now.

If they tell you that you can't do home bound, whatever you do, do NOT bring up that you'll homeschool. That'll open up a HUGE can of worms that you don't want to open at this point. Just thank them for their time and leave.

Answer 3

I would suggest calling someone familiar with the Americans with Disabilities Act. If your child cannot get the proper level of education in the school then he should be eligible for home-bound, however I think you need to work with the school. I am not sure what grade he is in but the stigma attached to the embarrassment he must surely feel, could potentially damage him for years to come. Why not try to produce the very best outcome? I have an eight year old and I would do anything for his well-being! Good luck to you...remember the squeaky wheel gets the grease!

Answer 4

I can't help you with the Home Bound answer.  I just empathize with you about your concern sending him to school.  

If Home Bound is not available to you, and your doctor can't recommend anything, you should probably look into homeschooling.  

The laws are different in every state.  You should call your local school district or check your state board of education's website for requirements.  Below is a good website for a quick look...

http://www.hslda.org/laws/default.asp?St...

I homeschool my daughter.  She didn't have any physical or medical problems...but was still picked on so badly that it took awhile to boost her self-esteem after the ordeal.  Just some teacher made a comment and the kids jumped on it.  They're like jackles or something!  Anyway, she is much happier at home and you'll find that most homeschooling families are very accommodating, tolerant, and easy to talk to.

Good luck!

Answer 5

The school may be able to give you the run-around about "Home bound" instruction through the Public School system.  But there isn't anything they can do about it if you just withdraw him and do whatever you must to file legally as a homeschooler in your state.  (There are totally different rules for "Home bound" and "Homeschooling")

Go to http://www.hslda.com for info on homeschool laws in your state.

You might actually get approved for the home bound program if you simply tell them flat out that if you are refused you will just homeschool independently.  They want their money for your sons enrollment, and if the choice is to approve him or lose his enrollment altogether they will probably approve him.  So feel free to give them an ultimatum if they won't cooperate.  You are the parent and you have the right to homeschool if the school is not meeting your son's need.

Answer 6

I would go in and put my foot down. They can't make you send him to their school. Either they put him in the homebound program or you homeschool which is legal in every state. They will try to encourage in every way to put him in. I guarantee no one wants to be changing his pants and believe me they won't if they don't have to. They have more important things to do then change your kids pants. Plus the embrassment of all of that. I don't think you would really want to put your son thru all of that. I say homeschool him until he can get thru this. He will be better off at home. If you really love your son you will tell them homebound or homeschool. End of story. Take cahrge and don't let them talk you into or bully you into sending your son. You can mess him up for life by the embrassment.

Answer 7

Make sure you are firm when u walk in. Let them know that you know what is good for your son and that you are not going to put your son through that embarrassment every day. Do not budge. Something like this can cause your son severs trauma that can affect him the rest of his life. Why force him to be in a place where is going to be worried about his condition and not concentrate on studying. Your the mom. Act like it.

Answer 8

seeing as how when i looked no one had answered I’ll take a crack at this I’m something of a writer and can give you some advice on what to say although i know nothing about the rights of it ok here goes I’m gonna try and write from your point of view  -Cracks knuckles-

Hello my name is -your name here-

i assume we know what we are here to discuss my son has a condition that to be put bluntly causes him to c**p himself at any given time in front of school mates and friends and you know how young kids can be the effect of the condition that isn't his fault will -Emphasize on will- cause him a slew of painful memories and cause my son to be anti social -look at the person in charge- can you imagine every second of your life ruled by your unruly bowels sitting in class trying to be a normal boy trying to get along with your peers but all the time being frightful of the fact that at any given moment you S**t! yourself imagine it right now imagine sitting in your office and in the middle of meeting having to cut it short hoping they'll leave before the smell takes over and you dare to justify this fact just because the d**n nurse will clean it up this exp will have a an impact on my son for the rest of life it make him an outcast at and early and studies have shown what that does to young people it will eradicate his self esteem it will hurt him deeper then any cut ever will and all we ask to save this young man is that he be placed in homebound so that he may overcome this problem that you seem to deem so low -look at the  psychiatrist- do you truly believe that you can repair my sons self esteem before i eve has a chance to grow do you really think he’s gonna be able to look anybody in the eye to be able to stand tall and stand strong or even concentrate on his grades in a time like this -let her talk then cut her off mid sentence- do even answer it because i will take this above you i will do all i have to spare my sons rights -they will try to point out that media would only hurt your son which it will but your not really gonna take it that far anyway look into the eye of the person that pointed that out and say boldly and simply- do you really want to take that chance do you know what will happen to your jobs no i suggest you rethink my sons ordeal and you rethink it now!

ok hope it helps

Answer 9

My shock at certain questions has garnered me the occaisional violation notice, so excuse my shock, but...

you have got to be kidding me! (there, it's done!)

I cannot find any part of me that even begins to think this is ok.

The principal said send your child to school and they would take care of changing him???

No, absolutely not. I cannot believe that someone who is supposed to be about the welfare of the children in his care would even begin to think it is ok to have a child in school in this condition.

I'm not saying it is hideous or anything, please understand. I'm concerned about what that would do to your child having to go through that several times a day at a publicschool.

Having an accident can be overwhelming on it's own.

You have the right to petition for what is best for your child. What does your doctor say about this? Get it in writing.

Ask the principal and counselor to provide written documentation of every case of this they have been personally involved in and how it turned out. Ask them to provide written documentation proving a situation such as this is best handled in a public classroom environment with school staff changing his pants for them. Ask them to provide written documentation that guarantees this will not adversely affect his mental health.

Ask them if they would expect their own children to sit in a classroom full of children with soiled pants day after day after day.

Do not be intimidated by these people. You are in control of this, they just don't want you to think so.

If they will not agree to homebound, then withdraw him, according to the law of your state and homeschool him until he is better. check www.hslda.org for how to do this and have the forms ready, just in case.

Once they see you are completely 100 percent serious about taking care of your child and that you are serious about doing whatever you can to ensure his safety, then they may give you what you want.

omgosh, bless your heart for having to deal with such insensitive people.

Answer 10

Simply tell them that for adequate medical reasons you have decided to engage in home schooling, and that the subject is not open to negotiation.  That's all there is to it.

Answer 11

Homeschooling is legal in all 50 states.  I do not have any medical problems and I homeschool.  www.hslda.org will give you all the information you need to know about how o legally homeschool in your state.  If the website states that you will need to have permission from your local school, then you will probably have a problem.  BUT, they cannot say no to you because we have rights on what how we want to have our children educated.  Some parents chose Public School, some will chose Private School, and others, like myself have chosen Homeschooling.  It is not up to the public school system to decide on what is best for your child.  It is up to YOU the parent to decide what is best for Your Child.  For every child that has medical issues that need attending to or on medication will earn the school more money.  That is why they target families that have children with special needs so much.  They trick them into thinking that they are is much better care at school then at home.   And the fact that the principal offered to change your sons pants is alarming and shows that he is trying to intimidate you.  Don't be afraid of these people.

Answer 12

I'm sorry that I don't know much about this, but I just wanted to say good luck! You are right that it is probably best not to put your son through that and don't take no for an answer! So long as it is not against the law then go for whatever you want. He is your son, your responsiblity and you know best!

Answer 13

I know how you feel my son has crohns and i pulled him out and home school him now teachers are rude don't understand and think it is a way to get out of class fight them if you have to home bound is OK but not enough hours try homeschooling instead www.k12.com and don't let them push you around you can do home bound he is sick enough

Answer 14

I agree - stand your ground.  They may give you the run around on HomeBound, but they can't do a darn thing about you homeschooling.  

In no way, shape, or form is it best for your child to have to go through that, in a classroom, on a daily basis.  Not only can the kids be cruel (like truly cruel) about stuff like that, but after the first couple of days, you can bet that the teachers/nurses/whoever aren't going to be that thrilled with the situation...and it will show with how they treat your son.

The school is obviously trying to keep the funding for your son (which always kind of seems ironic to me, as he's what they're supposed to be spending his funding on), and are not concerned with his welfare.

If you can get HomeBound, great!  If not, withdraw him immediately, and homeschool him privately.  It is legal in all 50 states, and as long as you follow the rules in your state, the school can't do a thing about it.  Here is a site that will tell you what you need to do, just click on your state:

http://www.hslda.org/hs/state/default.as...

Bless you for going through this for your son, and for fighting for his rights.  No matter what the school tells you, you are in charge of his education and his welfare - they have to deal with whatever you decide.