I really can't go on like this and need help to stop.

Question

I just moved to a new state and started a new job that I am really doing well at (already up for a promotion).. I work for a hospital and am a medical professional. I'm smart, successful and no one would know that I think about suicide every day. I was under the care of a psychiatrist before I moved. My husband and I can survive on my salary, so he has decided to take a break from work and "have fun." He barely pays any attention to me anymore. (We had to live in different states for a month to make the transition). I thought when he got here (he wanted the move as well) we'd be all romantic etc. This is the first weekend that I haven't been on call and he's in his den on the computer. I asked him to spend some time with me, which consisted of 15 minutes of watching SNL with me. I am tired of being ignored (no there is no other woman). I just feel so lonely and want to die. I have saved up enough pills to do it. I just feel like I could disappear and no one would notice.

Answer 1

Seek professional help. Coming here just means you're seeking attention from complete strangers who can only write up their suggestions to you, which will not help in the process of recovering from this depression.

The root of the problem here is the lack of support from your husband. You, as a human being, deserve better.

I wish you well.  

Answer 2

It isn't worth it.

Things get better.

My most believed-in saying is "Everything gets better in time"

Maybe you should try talking to your husband and telling him how you feel.

If you are successfull, smart, etc, then it is sooo not worth it.

Don't dwell on the negative, think about the positive.

Just don't do anything drastic because it's just how you're feeling at the time. You'll be fine if you just don't go and do something stupid.

Everyone will miss you.

Answer 3

i feel that there are two issues here, and they are seperate, but connected 1.  the situational or clinical depression that is causing you to be suicidal.  most people don't want to end it all because of a bad marriage or inconsiderate husband.  you said that you were under the care of a psychiatrist before you moved, you should be again.  i feel that this would be a great help, before it's too late.  perhaps you need your meds adjusted or he might suggest counseling to get to the root of the issue (and the other poster is right, sound bites from strangers on yahoo don't count, you need real counseling from a professional.)  2.  your husband.  whether he's neglectful or not is a matter of conjecture (we are only hearing your side of the story after all).  was he romantic before the move?  if not, you really can't expect him to be now.  he might not know that he's hurting you as much as i is.  the taking a break from work to "have fun" thing would irritate me big time.  he does sound very childish, but that is not for me to say, i don't know him.  

most importantly, you need to find happiness within yourself, independent of the marriage.  do you have hobbies that you enjoy?  friends that you enjoy being with? (if not, make some).  unfortunately, it is not your husband's ultimate responsibility to be happy, it's yours.  i have a lot of personal experience with depression.  it's hard, believe me i know.  don't kill yourself.  people on this earth do love you.  most importantly, God loves you.  don't forget that.

Answer 4

Taking Authority over Your EmotionsEmotions are an area that many Christians don’t understand. Because of this, Believers often allow their emotions to lead them. As a result, emotionally-led decisions take them on a course that is out of the will of God for their lives. While God gave every human being emotions, it is critical that we get control over negative emotions and subject them to the Word of God. Make these daily confessions so that you can subject your feelings to God’s Word and make the right decisions:

Heavenly Father, thank You for giving me healthy emotions. I declare that negative emotions will not impact my decisions, neither will they dictate my responses to difficult circumstances. I will submit my feelings to You in every situation that I encounter in life. You have given me authority over the power of the enemy, and I declare that nothing shall by any means hurt me, including people and situations that try to negatively influence my emotions. When I feel overwhelmed by life, or troubled by negative emotions, like Jesus, I will pray and keep moving forward  I bind depression, anxiety, worry, fear, doubt, anger, rejection and any other negative emotion that tries to attack my mind. I possess power, love and a sound mind. I thank You, Father, that I walk in peace, joy and the comfort of the Holy Ghost. I have the mind of Christ and my emotions are controlled by the Word of God. In Jesus name I pray. Amen.

Scriptural references:

·Mark 14:33-35

·Luke 10:19

·2 Timothy 1:7

·Romans 14:17

·1 Corinthians 2:16

God Bless U

Answer 5

please don't harm yourself. there is no problem so bad that you have to die over it. you are lonely and your husband isn't helping you. so you must help yourself. don't let your disappointment about your romantic life have this much power over you. I just lost my brother to suicide and it has broken my heart. please don't do it. find someone to talk to or go to a doctor. I won't let go of my life even one second before I have to. it's precious. as long as you are alive, you can fix these other issues. hang in there.  

Answer 6

get a divorce, find someone who will appreciate you. He's obviously not sticking to his end of the marital bargain.

either that, or the computer is more entertaining. I'm not there, I can't judge....but I would look inward first...maybe you're not being engaging enough? Maybe you're nagging....guys don't like nagging....again, I dunno...just thinking of possibilities.

Have you ever asked what he wanted to do?

Then again,he's probably using you for your job and money, and deserves to be kicked to the curb.

Answer 7

Please talk to someone and find some other interests.  Just think about yourself and what you used to, and would now, enjoy doing.  Try new things if the old ones don't interest you anymore.  Start enjoying being with 'YOU' and send him back home!!!

Answer 8

Suicide isn't the answer.  

You and your husband need to sit down and have an honest discussion.  Communication is key.  Moving is stress enough (new environment, loss of the familiar, leaving behind friends/family) without the added weight of feeling alone.  He might not understand what you're feeling or going through--you need to be specific.  My own husband as wonderful and intelligent as he is can be quite oblivious to things, I have to speak up.  You need to speak up.  There was a month gap in your relationship and I'm guessing the communication between the two of you was poor even before that.  Seek counseling for yourself and for you as a couple.  

Hugs!