I really don't want to marry my boyfriend?

Question

I moved cross country for my boyfriend, leaving everything behind. I realize this was a mistake because I had never lived with him before (we met online). He turns out to be the most argumentative person I have ever met in my entire life. He is always, always right and answers everything I have to say with a "no", followed by the correct answer (his opinion). I am finding myself so frustrated in this new city...knowing no one but his friends. It's so bad I want to find a second job just to get away from him. He angers me on a weekly basis, and I'm finding myself conversating only about superficial topics with him because otherwise, I know he's just going to make my blood boil. He also seems to enjoy making me feel stupid in front of his friends. Ironically, I have a college degree and he does not. I feel he is insecure about this, and tries to prove just how much smarter he is than me on a daily basis. Grrrrrrrrr, I don't know what to do. I can't keep living like this (and it's only been three months!)

Answer 1

well since you have a college degree and he does not, use what you learned from your communication class.

sit with him and talk with him, and remind him you are his gf not his sister. it is not okay to tease in public or in front of others.

and you both need to learn to discuss things properly.

living together is never easy,

and meeting online and then doing it is even harder

sit down with him, and talk with him, before you make anymore stupid decisions.

or meet another guy online and do it again.... Just joking

but if you find yourself needing to get out like NOW

google COUCH SURFING,

find local YOUTH HOSTELS,

look for rooms for rent.

or call me, I will encourage you to go home

Answer 2

Pack a sack, Jack

Make a new plan, stan

Hop on the bus, gus

Don't need to discuss much,

Don't need to be coy, roy

Just set yourself free.

Answer 3

well for starters it was dumb to move in with him

and secondly you need to stand up fror yourself

these are signs of premature mental abuse.

Answer 4

Take my advise from experience do not marry him . Take and have someone send you some cash get a bus ticket and go home. there is no reason to marry because you feel pressured it is all for the wrong reasons.  

Answer 5

He is doing that because he is acting insecure.  Believe me, other people probably notice how foolish he is acting too.  Maybe that is why he had to get a gf online.  Anyway, the best thing for you to do is get out of there.  Call home and see if your family or friends can help you with a place to stay, until you can get a job again and a place to live.  Get a plane ticket and leave.  I would not stay anywhere near this guy, because he may end up being trouble if you leave him. Do not let him know in advance that you are leaving.  If he is this controlling, it may be that he could harm you if he thought your were leaving.

Next time you meet someone online, try to have them visit and spend time with you before you move out of town for them.  People can tell you anything that they think will please you when they are hidden by a computer screen.  That is the way most people get in trouble with online predators.  My guess is that no one wanted to date him because of his attitude.  That is probably why he had to meet you by internet, as do many freaks.  You just happened to be the innocent victim he preyed on.

Answer 6

Are you dating my ex-boyfriend????   Seriously, get away from him and find a guy that will value your opinions, and someone that you can have fun with and well, someone who doesn’t sound like a looser.  I can feel so much anger from your email.  I feel sorry for you because I have been there and done that.  Don’t live in this relationship a second longer.  Get a second job if you cant afford to move out on your own, get your own place and work on finding the right guy for you and get rid of this loser.  You can do it and once you do, you will think to yourself, why didn’t I do this sooner!  Good luck.  DO NOT MARRY HIM.  you will regret it.

Answer 7

Then DONT  

Answer 8

so go back home, or move out.

what's the problem?. he's not keeping you under lock and key?!!

move on, you don't need that sh#t.

Answer 9

If you are this unhappy after 3 months, there is no way you should consider marrying him.  You tried something and it didn't work.  I would end the relationship, and if there is nothing holding you to where you are living, move back home or somewhere you want to be.  Staying in the relationship just because you moved across the country for him is not a good enough reason.  You should be in the relationship because you both understand, love, and respect each other.  Find someone who truly loves and respects you and you will know it when you are with the right person.

Answer 10

This is simple, but I suspect the hardest answer your going to get.

1. Save / buy for plane ticket home.

2. Get on airplane - Saying "goodbye" is optional, he'll probably argue about the correct way to say it. Sorry, I'm tryin' to be real.

3. Eat some peanuts, have a soft drink and enjoy an in flight movie.

4. Get off plane, remove this guy from your address book.

I promise, if you do these things. He can't argue with you on this one.

Love and peace my friend, no one deserves disrespect.  

Answer 11

then dont

Answer 12

Girl, get the h**l out of there.  Go with your gut.  I had a similar experience and ignored my gut and put myself through misery.  I always hoped it could change but it ended up with him throwing things at me.  I believe he would have hit me if I didn't get out when I did.  Point being, if he mistreats you now, there is no reason he is going to change.  He will run with it.  There ARE other guys out there who will treat you way better!!

Can I recommend the book, "Why Men Love b*****s"  (***** being a good thing) by Sherry Argov, my best friend just gave it to me, it's awesome.

Answer 13

Time to pack your bags, you already knew this.

Answer 14

it's been 3 months and you're already sick and tired of him?  well, your first mistake was moving across country to be with someone that you met online.  see, the thing about chatting it up with people online is that it creates a sense of "false intimacy".  you feel that you know someone and care for the.  the problem is that you only fell in love with the person that you thought that you knew...or that he portrayed to you.  when you got there, in person...he turned into the jerkoff that he really was.  

unfortunately, a lot of that is moot because what was done was done.  as for now though, i would get yourself a bus ticket/plane ticket/etc.  and get the h**l out of there.  this guy won't change, and this is going to be the next 50 years of your life.  is this what you want?  get out now, before you get attached, or pregnant and it's harder to get out.  your boyfriend sounds like a royal @sshole and he'll get worse, trust me.  cut your losses and move back home.  

Answer 15

See you are smart , now you only need to explain to him that it is just a communication problem not really related to his inflated ego but more that you never learned to speak fluent Jerk. GOOD LUCK

Answer 16

I refuse to believe that you went there with no financial security, so take your @ss back home.  If you did move out there with no money, call your mother or father and ask them can you come and stay with them until you get your life together.  You know i have an opinion about you moving in with someone you don't know, but i'll keep that to myself.  But if you are truly unhappy, leave his ***.

Answer 17

go back home. you won't regret it. what you will regret is getting stuck in a life long committment with a jerk who doesn't honor or respect you and is in direct competition with you always.

Answer 18

Get out of there. Did you meet face to face before you moved cross country to live with him? There are plenty more fish in the sea. And if he really does love you he will come back.

Answer 19

break up with him .

if he loves you his first priority should be maaking you feel comfortable in this brand new city you moved to just for him .