I spoke with a friend of mine today and he told me that 2 of his daughters, young in age to me 15 I think and?

Question

17, they are both pregnant. When I was younger, ok I graduated from High School 23 years ago ( although it seems terribly hard to believe) and college 15 years ago, and the entire time I was in high school, granted it was a private Catholic school NOT ONE PERSON IN MY CLASS OR ANY OF THE OTHER CLASSES was pregnant. However, being older now, and kids growing up so much faster, I was wondering at what age you should talk to your child about s*x and about protection and yes even abstinence. My son is 9 but all of a sudden has said things like, I want to see some naked ladies. ????

Funny these things never entered my mind until I was out of high school. I was taught that you go to H.S., go to college, get a job, start a career, and then get married and have kids. But I think I am in the dark.

Can you help me on this one? I would like to bring a Christian perpective to the talk but anything will help. Thank you very much.

Oh, is 9 too young?

Thank you all

Answer 1

9 is actually probably the perfect time to discuss these things with him.  I wouldn't go into birth control methods or anything like that yet, I'd save that until around 13 but I would explain to him what s*x is.  The way that you want him to know about it, because he's gonna hear it from his friends soon and who knows what they will tell him.  Explain how s*x is saved for when two people really love each other and are married.  Your son saying things about wanting to see naked ladies is probably things that he has heard from his friends at school.  Maybe get a book on the reproductive system of both sexes to assist him in learning about his body and a woman's.

Answer 2

Yes it is too young, my niece who is only 10 was put into an all girl school last year because of harrassment by boys, all they seem to want to do is distract the whole class, maybe put him in a christian college, they have higher moral standards, its like each generation is finding these things out way too soon, its definately a dilemma, you dont want to be a prude but want them to act responsibly, maybe a sit down open chat with both his parents might help him to realise that there are serious consequences for your actions, hope this helps, goodluck to you! :)

Answer 3

o would talk as early as possible,so they wont go out and try to figure out things you never taught them

Answer 4

Nine years old is too young to have s*x.

Answer 5

personally, i think the older the child, the better.

there was very little teen pregnancy years ago, when s*x education was taught to elder teens. now they seem to be teaching them at a much younger age and look what happens - teenage pregnancies galore. if kids are taught how to use their faculties, then they're going to use them.

they're now trying to teach children as young as 4 about relationships. can you believe it?! there's no wonder children are playing with themselves in schoolyards these days if this is the education they're given.

Answer 6

Kids are maturing at a much quicker rate these days.

I believe that 9 is a perfect age to give your son "the talk"

I was 8 myself, when my parents helped me understand it and it helped clear many things up!

Answer 7

In an ideal world, we would all wait until marriage to have s*x. Unfortunately, that is not what's happening. You should definitely talk to your son about the Bible and what is appropriate for your religion. But DON'T let that stop you from teaching him how to be safe. So many parents are simply telling their children "Don't have s*x!" Yes, that is an important part of the conversation you need to have with him, but it should be followed by, "But if you do, make sure you are using protection." Ideally everyone would wait until they were in love and settled, but adolescence is a really confusing time when many kids believe they ARE in love, and they are seeing what their classmates who are "in love" are doing with their boyfriend/girlfried. A HUGE contributor to underage s*x is peer pressure. Make sure you are raising your son to be independent and confident, and he will be less likely to do it because "it's cool." I do not believe 9 is too young to start talking to him. Search Y!Answers and see how many 12 year old girls are posting on here that they are pregnant and scared. Being a parent just gets harder and harder these days, but if you're bringing your son up in a good, Christian home, you're already one step ahead of most. Good luck and good job.

Answer 8

Remember, 23 years ago you would most likely not have known even if someone at your school was pregnant. Did anyone move away suddenly? Or be absent for a long while with a mysterious illness? That's all you would have seen of it.

I would talk to your son sooner rather than later. Personally I think it helps if they find out about s*x etc. while their reaction is still "eww, yuck" rather than "ooh, cool and mature". At nine you'll still be on basic biology rather than morals, I'd think - but you could certainly add in "this is something you don't do until you are married" if you wanted to.