I still have all the emails, text messages and phones records of my wife affair a year ago?

Question

even though it only about a month, it hurt our relationship very much, I never read all of that because I couldnt take it, but I keep all that in case she wanted to play me with attorney if we were to have a divorce, somehow I cant get rid of them cause I feel that it will help later in somehing happens, we are still trying to work things out for the sake of our 3 and 4 year old kids, things are getting better little by little, even though I dont trust anything completely, is it really worth it to keep all that any longer?

Answer 1

I don't think the real question is should you keep those things to help you should you divorce.  I think the real issue is that you have not let go of what happened.  I understand.  My husband almost cheated on me and I kept every on-line message, every photo he send of his p***s to her...everything.  It is under my side of the bed and I sleep on it every night.  And I will continue to sleep on it until it is resolved in my head.  In my opinion you should throw it out when you are ready to move on and not a second sooner.  I know you are working on your marriage but the hurt and pain of what you have gone through will take years to mend.  My advice?  Sleep on it.

Answer 2

You keep hold that over her head and you are sure to divorce. You have to forgive completely in order to make the marriage work again. You still have those texts like you are waiting for it to end. You are your own worse enemy. Good luck.

Answer 3

dose she know you have them?keep it all, you never know how bad divorces can go. In case things go sour, a little leverage never hurts.  expecially when children are involved. Hopefully you will be able to completely trust again.

Answer 4

That's pretty cool. You can hold it over her, and make her feel horrible if she gets uppity. Then if she tries to leave you, you can make it public so you can print copies for her entire group of family and friends (co-workers if you are cold enough). Make her suffer.

Answer 5

It doesn't hurt to keep them, in case.  But I know that if I were your wife, whether I was wrong or not, I would probably want my relationship to be over if you never let it go.  I just mean that you stayed with her, its like you forgave her.  You can't forgive her and treat her like she's still cheating and continue to remind her.  It gets irritating.  How else are you going to start fresh?  Although its hard to forget, it's annoying to be constantly reminded of what happened.  No one wants to be in a relationship like that. I know I wouldn't simply because you chose to let it go, so let it go.  Or break up.  Because if you don't let it go then she'll eventually leave you.  She'll be fed up.  

Answer 6

print it and put it up and put it away and forget about it -unless she does bad again --always cover your butt -but if you dont you will never fix the broken

Answer 7

no wonder she had an affair! You are revengeful and vindictive!Too bad for your poor kids cause they'll grow up just like you unless she can take them and run!

Why do you think any judge wants to hear that? This is a no-contest country, not the middle ages where you have to prove there is a reason for a divorce. Throw them out and get you and her to counseling so you don't take out your anger on the kids.

Answer 8

those tapes won't mean a thing to any judge, especially if your state is a no fault divorce state.if u don't trust her seek some christian counseling attest for yourself.no one ever wins in a divorce,and when children are involved its usually best to make an attempt to work it out.those tapes will not get u anything if a divorce were to happen because its a different day then it was years ago, its a change in morals, and people cheat  on spouses everyday and it never matters when divorce happens,the court system doesn't want to get involved anymore.

Answer 9

the longer you hang onto it the hard it will be for your marriage to recover from it,,, let it go, its time, you said you both are working on it.. so stop holding onto the past. let it go and look towards the future.  

Answer 10

Check with your state, but MOST states don't even hear or allow "cheating" as the reason for divorce any longer.  

I think the longer you keep them, it's just causing you pain

Answer 11

If the two of you are working out your marriage, time to get rid of things from long ago.  You knew about it, you two are working to get past it so, leave it in the past.  Sometimes, it is best to bury the dog than to have his bones hanging around.  Otherwise, you will never be able to get over it. Let it go.  It is not worth it.

Answer 12

If you're really afraid, keep them in a separate folder and put them out of sight so that you don't see them and get upset... since you're working things out, try not to hold what she has done in you heart still.. put it behind you and try to move on. good luck.

Answer 13

My husband came home with hickeys on his neck 2 years ago, it will never goo away and i will never trust him again, i hate him for it, he contaminated our marriage and i still think about leaving him over it every day. it hurts and sucks , good luck

Answer 14

try to make and rebuild relationship.

Answer 15

keep them.

ur relationship is doomed now.

you will try and try to "repair" the relationship, but it wont work.

in the end, when all the gloves are off, you will need that evidence...lol..if she had that against you, id bet my life she'd use it.

be smart. keep it.

keep it forever. just hide it away somewhere for safe keeping.

for when you wake up and realize that you dont want to spend every nite for the rest of your life with someone who spread their legs, *or bent over, lol* for someone else.

Answer 16

If you are trying to go forward, then you must let go of the past. Get rid of those things. They will only make you crazy. You two should burn it all together. Both of you have to let it go. Live for the next day, not looking back at what she did wrong. Good luck.