I tend to rush things and ruin everything with a guy. Advice?

Question

I have a bad habit of constantly worrying about where things are going with a guy that I often don't realize how much I'm ruining everything.

I've been talking to this guy for a few weeks. We've known each other for years but we're obviously interested in each other now. How can I keep things light, but also, how do I keep things progressing smoothly?

I need to keep myself occupied with other things but my brain just does not want to work this way lol. I prefer brutal honesty.

Answer 1

I'm not sure about the whole 'levels' thing, so I'm just gonna say it.

Don't force him to the 'next level'. Even if you're ready, he may not be.

Let him move forward at his own pace, and occasionally bring up the 'next level' thing.

If he brings it up, then great! But don't jump on the chance instantly. It may freak him out.

Also, you may want to discuss this with him, see how he feels about how fast you should go.

He's an old friend, like you said, so this is probably something you can trust him with.

And don't be preoccupied with where you are going, if you are meant to be together, you will get there.

Good luck, hope I helped.

Answer 2

Just slow down and don't jump into things.

Answer 3

It really seems like you are too worried about the RESULT of things that you cant even seem to enjoy living in the moment. Although it is normal for girls to get a little over excited about a boy liking you at times, you need to just relax and be yourself. If you're too worried about what could be...you're surely ruin what will be. At least you realize what you're doing wrong...and now you can work on it! Good luck!

Answer 4

you answered your own question.  Keep your mind occupied with other things

Answer 5

get a hobby  

Answer 6

Well, don't try to push him into things if he brings it up then talk about it, but don't bring i up unless you feel you have to because that would be awkward. Also don't rush a guy because I know I don't wanna be rushed and if you do care about him it shouldn't matter, you have all the in the world if things go right, and if your going to fast that probably means they are nice guys so try to wait for him to make th first move.

Answer 7

Lose any desperation you might have.  Yes, your life shouldn't revolve around some guy you just met a few weeks ago.  You're probably not ruining anything... and you're just wondering when/if he's going to make a move and ask you out or whatever.  

And he may be thinking the same thing you are- about ruining things.  Maybe show him a few obvious signs you like him.  Then he'll be more comfortable to make a move.