I think I'm a bit racist...?

Question

I'm Filipino and was brought up with the ideal that it was best to marry within my own "race". Just recently my boyfriend's friend who is the same "race" as I began dating a "black" girl who I think personality-wise nice and a bit on the shy side (which is not a bad thing). However, their relationship seem to be conflicting with my ideal and I do not want to blame it on how I was brought up. Every time I think of it, I find it a little odd and sometimes find myself sort of cringing on the inside. I know it's none of my business what happens with other people and the choices they make and I should keep this opinion to myself. However, do not get me wrong, I have great "black" friends and believe that they are awesome people.

How can I change this old-world/racist/unnecessary thought?

Answer 1

Ugh I know how you feel. My mom was brought up like that. My Lolo didn't want my mom dating my dad because he was black, but my mom didn't care. My lola wasn't that happy either, but she got over, and actually got to know my dad, more as a person, and not for the color of his skin. Eventually my lolo came around when my dad bought him a boat (the boats' what made him realize that my dad really did love my mom) And then he found out him, and my dad had lots in common, and he's like his third son! But what I'm saying is underneath all the color of your skin, and the texture of your hair we're all the same, and I'm sure if you got know her more, and realize what she means to your friend you could learn to like her, and not feel awkward.

Answer 2

That's the problem with the Filipino people, they think that marrying another nationality would lead to divorce coz of diff cultures, but you know its not always the case.  I agree with the first answerer. We are all humans here no matter what race you belong to. All of us have our own rights when it comes to choosing partners.

I also live in the Phils but we aren't brought up in that way. In fact our entire family clan are diverse.  I'm 2/3 Filipino, 1/3 Spaniard overall from parents who are both Spanish mestizos.   2 of my dad's cousin married an American guy, my uncle (dad's brother) married a half-chinese, then my aunt & godmother from mom's side married a Japanese guy.  I got Fil-Am cousins, Fil-Japanese cousins, Fil-Chinese cousins & of course me & my siblings are Fil-Spanish. Our clan is like, a fruit salad or the so-called united colors of benetton or perhaps in the future, we could even have our own Mr & Ms. UN (United Nations) within our clan, LOL!!!

But seriously because of our diversified clan, we are able to learn & understand about other cultures & have an open-mind about races. Just think about this & it might somewhat help you change that racist thought.

  

Answer 3

You will have to realize that people are people,we are all human and that a person's overall character will always outweigh their racial background anyday. You can try to see it that way, or you can just keep your opinions to yourself.