Here’s the deal: I think I’m going crazy. I graduated in the top five of my class at high school and I’m not going to college for a while. I’ve never been able to get a job because any interview I went to I was never called back. It’s been over twenty and I must say that I’m getting pretty tired that my Asperger’s Syndrome is getting in the way. I guess it’s noticeable…just being a little different, that’s all. Anyway, I wouldn’t normally mind the social isolation since around this time I would’ve been starting school, but I’m not starting school. I’m stuck at home. All I’ve been going to are job interviews and well, I just told you my success with them. I can’t even get a job at McDonalds. This social isolation is affecting me in a bad way. I can’t sleep for long periods of time and when I do I always wake up from a nightmare. For some reason rain makes me fall asleep faster, but it also scares the living h**l out of me waking up to the patter of it in the middle of the night. I constantly avoid looking at myself in mirrors because it looks like I’m seeing something else. Something a bit wicked. Hateful. Upset. I’ve always been unsatisfied with my life, but I have to say what I feel right now is scaring the **** out of me.
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