I think I might be depressed....?

Question

Well this started abouutt 3 years ago (when I was 14) and I was just feeling so down on myself all the time. I changed my look 3 times since then, and each time, for about 4 months, my self esteem would be great! I would feel good and like the way I looked...and then I'd come down and feel just as bad as I did in the beginning.

In the past 3 years my life has gone from great to poor. My dad lost his job and that has been affecting me tremendously (ya know, the whole keeping up with the Joneses complex)..my self esteem has been taking hit after hit after hit. I never feel good enough. Boys have never seemed to be interested in me, I've lost some friends (and I still don't know what I did..tried to be a good friend?) and those things just break me down. I hate the way I look 75% of the time (think I'm fat and kinda ugly..even though I'm only like 115lb at 5'3). I usually would prefer staying at home alone in my room than be out with my friends (a lot of the time though I do go out with them). If someone calls me ugly, or if I fail at sometime, or don't make something... I just crumble. I feel inadequate compared to others in certain things (not academics, but like sports, looks, personality, etc.).

My life just seems to get worse and worse. Everyone always says that it'll get better..but it never does!!! I usually try and hide this and I don't really want to tell my parents...

I've never done anything drastic (like drugs/eating disorders), because I want to have a good life (and also because I'm def addict material)..but the cards have never been in my favor..and I just cant take it anymore! I am so sick of feeling awful because of the way things seem to turn out!

I just don't know what to do. This has been going on for so long now...

What advice would you give me to get rid of this?

Answer 1

You could be depressed.

But personally, I think it is just the way that you look at life.

You should start telling yourself positive things! You sound like you always are thinking something bad is going to happen! It doesn't have to be like that.

You have the power to attract whatever energy you want in the world. If you think positive, life will bring good things. If you are always down on yourself and think negatively that is what you will get.

Good luck and I hope you feel better. You could always talk to a school psychologist or your family and see how they can help too.

Answer 2

Look, hun, you're not going to get better by waiting for something to happen that'll make you feel better. Doing something that you won't believe later isn't going to help either. I know, I've been through the same thing, except for I did the drastic, I was cutting myself. I had a good friend who sat me down and laid things out on the table for me. She was hard core, and got straight to the point, so I'm going to get straight with you too. You are the only one who can control how you take life. You could look at what you don't have, or you can look at what you do. To feel better, I think you know what you need to do. For my self-esteem, every time I looked in the mirror (I was challenged by someone I look up to) I said 5 things about myself that are good, everyday, no repeats. It could be about the little things, I like my nose, or I have a cute laugh. I still do it to this day. Write everything that you hate about yourself on a piece of paper. Then rip it all up, cuz you know that can't be true! Confidence is key. Guys like girls who have confidence. Confidence isn't who you are, it's who you think you are. If you learn that you are truly worth it, then you will be more confident, and people will see that. They'll be the people that want to be your friend and maybe even your boyfriend :). You are good enough. You are worth it. Even when it seems like its all crumbling down on you, it will end eventually. Think about your life ahead of you, you've got college maybe or tech school, you get a career and you get to leave all of this behind. I'm only 15, but I know what ur going through. If you need to talk about anything, you can email me.  

Answer 3

First of all, even though you sound like you may be depressed, you still sound like you are very intelligent and have a good head on your shoulders.  Don't be so hard on yourself.  Set goals of things you would like to accomplish (even if they are little).  You will feel good about yourself when you complete your goals.  Try not to focus on the negative.  By the way you described you body type, you are not fat at all.  Maybe there is something you dislike about your body, which is more than common.  Find out what it is, and work out to fix that area. Find ways to improve your life.  No one knows you better than you.  Get some self help books.  Don't ruin your best years obsessing.  Trust me, once you start to feel better you will notice people treating you differently.