I think I regret getting married....?

Question

but we have 2 kids.....

All I want to do is leave and be free...

But I worry my kids will hate me, They are only 1 & 2...

I think I will leave him in the end, its just a matter of when, now when the kids are young or when I am 45 and the kids are grown up, but then I might regret staying and wasting my life in a loveless marriage.

I am only 26

I feel like a bad person all the time because he loves me and I cannot give him the respect and love that he deserves.

I also stay cause its easier money wise and I am scared to hurt him, but I feel like I am hurting him already he just wont admit it.

I am abount to get a part time job cause I feel like it might make me happy to get out of the house and away from the kids and there fore might make my marriage happier if I am happy. But I dont really want the job...If I leave him I might need the job to help pay the bills...

I just cry all the time and think about leaving and think about what life will be like without him...

Answer 1

Divorce isn't the answer. You get a divorce you' re going to have all the bills, no extra help with the kids, if you can get child support, good luck, all of the headaches of raising 2 kids alone. Trust me, the grass isn't greener on that side of the fence. You divorce if you have tried all else and nothing works. If you are getting beaten, verbally and physically abused, cheated on, trust me, you have a good marriage. Depression plays with your head, you assume, all is bad in your life, marriage as you are not seeing what you Do have that is good in your life. You can get counselling work on your marriage. Ya divorce? No second chances. Kiddo, if its post partum, you can get meds for that, and counselling. I would check that out first.  

Answer 2

Divorce is NOT a solution. It is trading in one set of problems for a new set. Please don't kid yourself that once you leave, you will be happy. It doesn't work that way.

If these are the thoughts you are having every day, no wonder you are so unhappy. You need to get some new thoughts.

When we keep having the same thoughts over and over again, it's like they wear a groove into our brains. We get stuck there. The more we think these things, the more we become convinced they are true.

It won't be easy to get new thoughts at first but if you really want your life to be happy and fulfilled, you have to want to try - and keep trying.

First, make a list of all the good things about your husband and your marriage. Every time you start having negative thoughts, read it and trade the bad thoughts for the new good thoughts. Find ways to appreciate him. It will make you feel really good about yourself.

Next, buy a blank notebook and turn it into a gratitude journal. Every night before bed, write down as many things you are grateful for as you can think of.

Then, look at your kids every morning and realize how precious they are. Ask yourself what you can do today to create a beautiful future for them. Then do it. You're in charge of their lives right now so they are counting on you to make good choices and decisions for them.

I think you desperately need to feel good about yourself. I hope you will take my advice and get back in touch with the positive things in yourself, your marriage, your family, your life. I wish you all the best.

Answer 3

Face it.   You made a SERIOUS MISTAKE GETTING MARRIED!!!!!  You married for all the wrong reasons and you made a huge mistake!

Once you face it, you can do the right thing and leave your husband, letting him have full custody of the children.   Face it, he's the better parent.   You're just causing him suffering by staying.  

You need to mature, get yourself together, then maybe you can come back to be a great mother to your children.

Answer 4

post marital stress and post partum depression is what you have hon.........go talk to your doctor, most of us go through or have gone through the exact things you are experiencing......