I think i am going to hurt myself or someone else and my parents are laughing about it and think im joking..?

Question

Im 17 years old and when I was 15 I was diagnosed with bipolar disorder 1. Eventually I stopped going because my parents thought "it will go away".

Well about a month ago I broke down and told my parents that i really need to see a doctor because i am slowly becoming very suicidal. At first its like they didn't believe me, but they said they are going to find me a doctor off my dads insurance.

That was early July, its now mid August and my parents haven't done anything, NOTHING, everyday i wait for my dad to tell me that he found me a doctor, but still nothing. I even ask them, and all they can say is "we are looking"

So Friday i started having thoughts of not only hurting myself, but others. I actually wanted to beat up my friends till near death. I had no reason, I am just going through a HORRIBLE dysphoric mania, and I can't even think and differentiate between right and wrong.

Sometimes something will be sooooo wrong to me in my brain. 10 hours later my brain is tricking me into believing its ok.

So i went to my parents and told them yesterday that this is VERY SERIOUS, and that i don't want to hurt someone in my family or someone else or myself.

They laughed at me and said "why would you be having suicidal thoughts, hahaha?"

"go out and get a job or something"

This is quite possibly the WORST summer and maybe even the WORST year ever in my life. No heartbreak, humiliation, NOTHING up till now compares to how bad i feel.

Imagine 6 months of a horribly depressive episode and then getting thrown into a dysphoric manic episode. ITS SUCH A HORRIBLE FEELING...

You know friends might hurt you, girls might hurt you... buts its all good, you get over it.

Its when your family hurts you, thats when it hurts 10 times more than anything else.

Its like every 3-4 months I have to sit explain why my disorder and how serious stuff is, they act like they understand and a week later they are back to normal. Thing is each time i become worse and worse...

Answer 1

you may want to see someone at your school or tell your parents unless they find you a professional that you will see someone at your school.  Ask your parents if you can help them search for the psychiatrist/psychologist since most likely it's a web based search anyway.

Good luck and don't hurt anyone.

Answer 2

This is awful for you. I recommend you call a suicide hot line and talk to them and get advice. They are more equipped in this area than any one who you will get here. They may even be able to talk to your parents or tell you how to get help on your own. The number should be in your phone book.

Answer 3

Go to the school nurse, not psychologist. Don't tell her that you are going to hurt people, just that you need to see someone, outside of the school psychologist. Tell her what your parents said.  See what she recommends you do.

There are articles at www.depressionand anxietypain.com that will help.

Stay positive,

SL

Answer 4

Contact your county Mental Health dept.  every county/state has one.  you don't need your parents permission to get help.  But given their lack of interest in you, they should seek help also.

Answer 5

Do not wait..... Go to the local hospital and tell them how you are feeling. They will help you. If you really feel that you are going to hurt yourself or someone else PLEASE TO NOW! I promise they have the resources to help you.

Please be safe and take care of yourself now!

Answer 6

you need to keep on at your parents until they get you help. I dont know what advice to give you, its a difficult one, but i hope you get some help and relief very soon

Answer 7

try this site.....http://www.helpguide.org/mental/obsessiv...