I think my sister is suicidal- what should I do?

Question

I know I shouldn't snoop, but I've been worrying about my teenage sister lately because she seems very depressed and reclusive. While flipping through a notebook of doodles I came across a diary she started this spring. She repeatedly mentions killing herself on a specific date this fall.

Now I'm completely freaked because I love her, but also confused as to what to do.

I could ignore it.

I could tell my parents, but that would be admitting that I totally dug through her stuff. She would never trust me again, even if everything ended up ok.

I could talk to her. I went through a stage in my teens where I thought about suicide; obviously, it passed. However, this would mean I'd have to admit to going through her stuff, just to her, and she might be so mad about that she won't listen to me.

Any and all advice is appreciated.

Answer 1

First, are there any other signs? Change of mood (besides depression), loss or increase in appetite, her actually talking about it? Well if or if not, I could tell you a few things to do. 1. You can ask a parent.

2. You can ask a teacher/counselor.

3. call: 800-SUICIDE (800-784-3433) *

4. call: 303-429-3530 (yellow ribbon project(prevent teen suicide). *

* equals strongly recommended.

I wouldn't tell your sister about it, because usually suicidal people deny it. Just continuously tell her how much you love her.

Good luck for both you and your sister!

Answer 2

Its better to divert her attention in something really interesting and introduce a charming person to her who can prove to be a fair and decent friend and family well wisher !

Let her share her emotional problems with him or with her keeping yourself a little away !

God bless her with wisdom, courage and hope .

Answer 3

i understand ur care for ur sister but u shan`t go throgh her stuff .wat makes hr wants to die ??? does she faces horrible problem ??try to talk to her with more understandin` cz zis age rquire more sympathy!!!!!!!!!

i hope i hv helped u sm hw!!!!!!!!!!

Answer 4

she will p**s herself thoroughly before she kills herself

most people go through this stage and most of them did not have the balls to do it

if you are really worried leave her note book somewhere where your parents can find it

or you can keep an eye on her

or treat her VERY specially for the next while (without raising suspicions of course) if she remembers you she wont go through with it

or watch her on that day

or take her somewhere fun that day

Answer 5

I would go to the library and rent a book for her to read to enlighten her. Make her feel differently about life in general. Here's a good one; Your Sacred self by Wayne Dyer

Answer 6

If you do nothing and she does kill herself, how will you feel? Would you rather her be alive and not speaking to you? or dead and not speaking to you?

You should tell your parents - how will they feel toward you if your sister does kill herself and they know you knew - You dug this hole, now fix it.

Answer 7

You need to talk to some people who your sister particularly likes and see if they would come round and ask for her to come to the movies with her and get her out more in the sun and doing things she likes, then when she is out check her notebook see if it's happier if not tell your parents just don't leave it too late.

Answer 8

you need to tell your parents

Answer 9

well you have two choices

1. ignore it because she get pissed and never trust you again,  but she may end up dead and then she isnt around to hate you for squealing or not trust you

2. Tell her you know, and not telling her why, tell your parents, or a guidance counselor thus saving her life!!!

Answer 10

You need to talk to your parents right away about this. Sure, she'll be angry about you going through her stuff, but wouldn't you rather have her alive and angry rather than dead? And eventually, when she was better, she would forgive you. Don't wait, talk to your parents NOW!

Answer 11

well, you don't have to admit you went through her stuff to tell her you think she needs help. you can tell her that you thought she was really depressed lately and you didn't want her to make the wrong turn like you did. i would say talk to her first. if she keeps denying she is suicidal, tell you parents. at THAT point you need to tell them how serious it is and that she actually made up specific dates. you are saving your sister's life by doing this. i am sure she won't be mad at you. and even if she does get mad, it will only be for a little while, would you rather have that or her commit suicide?i'm so sorry you have to go through this and i am here to talk. hope this helps!

Answer 12

Maybe hang out with her on that day never leaving her side, but I would tell your parents, incase she is very serious about this.  but explain to your parents not to get angry with her but to approtch her gently about the subject.

Answer 13

You can bring up your own past thoughts about suicide without ever admitting you looked at her stuff.

Hopefully she will open up.

If not you need to tell her what you saw before you mention it to your parents.

She will hide whatever action she might take from you and your parents if she loses your trust.

You can never assume a person is "looking for attention" or bluffing about suicide.

I believe most people think about it at some point.

Her writing it down may have been so you do see it and talk with her.

Answer 14

Tell your parents because if she goes through with it they will find out AFTERWARDS and you will feel so guilty!

Approach her and ask her how she is doing and why she is being at home all the time.  Find out if it is something to do with her friends, maybe she feels she cant talk with someone in the family.  See how she is coping with school and whether she might need some support with homework.  Ask her if she wants to go out with you and your friends somewhere.

Answer 15

tell her the truth... you were worried and you just wanted to make sure she was okay.

Don't sit back and watch it happen. You will never forgive yourself if it actually does.

She will forgive you for going through her stuff eventually but you NEED to tell someone

Answer 16

talk to her about it and if she says anything that scares u tell hyour parents or take her to a therapist immediatly!!

Answer 17

You can try being subtle. Treat her or spend more time with her.

Suicide is caused by feelings of being inadequate and being just a waste of time and energy and resources (on a person's loved ones). So from that maybe you can make her see that her life still matters by giving her responsibility and then rewarding her for accomplishments and injecting hope by telling her she still has some potential left to fulfill.

Also she could be stressing over her current "phase." Maybe some of her instinctive needs aren't being met. (Some things feel more important at a certain stage of one's life--it's biologically wired into us.) Look into it.

Good luck.

Answer 18

Who cares if she gets upset because of what you read! Tell her what you saw! And try to get her some help :-)

Answer 19

Talk to her.  But talk her by saying how good life is and all the things she has to live for.  If towards the date she is still wanting too kill herself tell your parents.  If it gets to that date try not to let her out of your sight.  Be there for her.

Answer 20

This is a matter of life and death....her anger is not something that should be of concern, it's her life you should be concerned with.  Since you cannot directly do much for her, I'd talk to your parents about it, they have the authority to get treatment and help for her.

Answer 21

Tell your parents.

Answer 22

Is your sister in school? You could talk to her school counselor at school about your concerns, then the counselor can talk to your sister about how (s)he noticed that she didn't seem like "herself". The counselor will not tell your sister anything you tell them, I mean about the person who's concerned about her. If you really think she's serious, get her to a counselor, or take her to a mental health facility and have her evaluated. This way, the weight won't be on your shoulders anymore, but they will take over, and if they advise she go into the hospital for treatment, and she refuses, they can petition her to go, which means she would be going against her will. I'm sure maybe she was hoping someone would "read" her diary, and is really asking for help. Talk to her, tell her you care about her and ask her if she is suicidal. Don't be afraid to use the word "suicidal", or feel like killing herself. This is a big burden for you, so get her to a mental health clinic, see the counselor, tell your parents. If your sister gets angry for your reading her diary, in the future she will be thankful you did and helped get her help. Find some suicidal helpline telephone numbers you or she can call for advice. When this "date" gets closer, and you feel that nothing is going to help your sister, then call 911 and tell the police your sister has threatened suicide, and they will come and help her. You need to tell someone who is trained in this area of expertise. You can email me if you need to talk to, I've been there and can understand your concerns.

Answer 23

if by saving your sisters life then it wont matter that you pried into

her diary, Ithink you must tell your parents about this the sooner the

better.

Answer 24

my sister did the same thing and it scared the **** out of me she looked up to me a great deal so i started hanging out with her allot more took her shopping and stuff and finally she opened up and tolled me something was bothering her and i talked her through it

Answer 25

If you think your sister is thinking about suicide, look for warning signs, like if your sister is talking about suicide often, saying goodbye, sudden sense of calm, and withdrawing from others are some signs to look for.

Ways to prevent others from commiting suicide, are to speak up if your worried, respond quickly in a crisis, and offer suppport and help.

Don't ignore your sister or leave her alone. Urge her to get medical help.  

Answer 26

Have her call the suicide hotline.  Look online.  Try googling "suicide hotline."  I don't know it, but it's where people can call and be talked out of suicide.

Would you rather tell your sister that you went through her stuff, or lose your sister?

Answer 27

I don't think you need to tell her you read her diary, but don't do it again. She deserves her privacy and may feel even more suicidal if she finds she doesn't have any privacy.

Have a sisterly chat with her to "check up" on her. Ask her how she is doing, how is school, friends, ect. Suggest going shopping just the two of you, and be consistent and sincere with your interest in her at least until the time she proposed to kill herself passes if not for the rest of your lives. If you love your sister, show interest in her life. If she is depressed she may snap out of it when she realizes someone cares a lot about her and would suffer terribly if she took her own life.

You are in a pretty good position by being an older sister to help her. You can tell your parents you think your sister might be depressed because she looks down a lot lately. If your parents are paying attention they will have already noticed. You can bring that up in your sisterly chat too, say you've noticed she's been down, is she feeling well, does she need anything? Do stuff for her. I don't know what your home life is like but if you do your own laundry, offer to do hers too. Compliment her. Give her a hug. Tell her she can always talk to you about anything and you won't ever judge her or lecture her.