I think my teacher and I are in love with each other...what do I do?

Question

Or at least sexually! Im 18 and female, in my final year of schooling. I would not concider myself at all niave, foolish or precocious. However I have, for 3 years now, fallen for a teacher. We have always been very close to point of which i asked her the following:

"why do you care about me so much?"

She replied with the following:

"If you don't already know the answer to that by now..."

Please can someone tell me what the above means??

I respect and admire her more than anyone. All we have to do is talk and you can feel the electricity. But I have never openly said anything or done anything (sexually speaking) because Im afraid to risk and lose our relationship. So what do I do? I am also Debating Captain and she heads it up, we both love English and oh AND she is married and is 12 years older plus/minus. But my friends say she does treat me differently. We have also been through a fight or 2...but we just cant stay away frome eachother. Any help?

Answer 1

I would have said wait until you're out of high school to attempt anything so that she doesn't lose her job.

However, she is married. You should drop it and forget it.

That simple. There are other people you'll have chemistry with.

Answer 2

It is possible that your teacher is attracted to you as well especially as others have noticed that you are treated differently. But it is possible that your teacher could simply care for you alot because you all have a lot in common and she sees alot of potential in you for great things ....so tread carefully...

First of all, I think you should definitely wait until you have left the school/graduated before telling her your feelings as this could interfere not only with your relationship with her (if the attraction is not mutual) but also your academics and her job (if the attraction is mutual).  Also, if I were you, I would only tell her if you could see definite signals of mutual attraction e.g. extended eye contact, touching, always wanting to be close/near to you, smiling with you, always going the extra mile for you, always being excited to see you, blushing, laughing at your jokes ...etc.

Secondly, there is the major issue of her being married. If you do decide to tell her, make sure to let her know that you respect her marriage and do not have any bad intentions. if she reciprocates the feelings, then you all would have to talk through your feelings for each other and come to an understanding. But in your case, it seems as though you would be at risk of being used more than her. So even if she does have feelings for you, do not allow yourself to be used while she continues her marriage. That would be emotionally and physically unhealthy for everyone in the equation (you, your teacher and her husband).

As for what she said to you, all I could say is that it could mean anything and everything. It is a very vague statement

Answer 3

I'm sorry, but she's making pedophile noises.  She needs to be reported to the administration...sorry, I know that's not what you wanted to hear.  But a teacher (especially 12 years your senior) has NO business making remarks like that to you.

Answer 4

Teachers sometimes develop a kind of love for certain students that is neither platonic or sexual. It can be mistaken for friendship, surrogate parenting, or even physical attraction.

But it is not. Her answer is a, forgive the pun, "a textbook" answer for the teacher/student relationship.

She's also married and your teacher. Don't destroy her life, by chasing down something that doesn't even exist.

Be grateful you have a teacher like her, but search elsewhere for romance.