I thought my wife enjoyed love making, but?

Question

The other day she said She didn't like it, she said, I want it more often than she does, and it bothers her when I touch her, especially when not durring love making.

What Am I supposed to do with that. Outch.

We've fought about love making before, but it's been a while, I thought it was better now,

What do I do.

Answer 1

You didnt say how old you are and thats important.If your older could be a hormonal inbalance with wife.If younger it is TIME to sit and ask her what SHE needs from you in the lovin dept.Do not accuse,blame or say I need "it" more.Follow me?Im not saying your wrong in any way,just trying to help you two resolve this peacefully,ok?Make dinner and clean up good and tell you need to "hear"what she needs.Listen to all she says,THEN ask your questions calmly.There are so many issues that could be at play here.Money worries,job stress,kids?making her nuts.Just talk and if there is no resolution,maybe a councelor may be needed.Your pastor-yes they handle all marriage problems-call around if need be.Some use a "sliding scale" what you can afford to pay,good luck,E

Answer 2

She did not tell you this before you married? I think she has forfeited her right to  be married. Don't waste your life waiting for her to grow up or gain some psychic maturity

Answer 3

She sounds like my ex - closet L*****n.

Find out now before you waste too much time.

Answer 4

When yo find the answer please let me know I am in the situation myself, except that she want cuddling and such but when I want a little more it's too much....  Good luck

Answer 5

Stop letting her spend any of your money.  Let her live within her own means.  In a divorce she is entitled to half, but not during the marriage.

Trust me once you realize how much you save and she realizes how much you have she will be very interested to get her hands in it.

Remember, women like to spend money and will do some interesting things to get the money.

Answer 6

Maybe she has some unresolved issues that you don't know about.  Was she molested as a child?  Has she ever been raped?  Even if those things happened a long time ago, they can have an everlasting negative effect on the victim's perspective on sexuality.  If nothing like that has ever happened to her, does she have some self esteem issues that she is dealing with?  If a woman doesn't feel that she is attractive, she will find it hard to beleive that her husband could find her attractive either.  I suggest having a calm, heart to heart discussion with her.  Try to get her to open up to you as to why she doesn't like intimacy.  It probably has less to do with you than you think.

Answer 7

well, its simple... ask her.. if she doesnt want to have s*x with u.. you tell her, you will find the lover.. LOL.. just like your  name. " best answer LOVER".. lol

Answer 8

Maybe it ain't her, hon, maybe it's you.  

Guys think that just because they can get an erection, the lady ought to be on fire.  

Sweets, your p***s is for YOUR pleasure, but your hands, gentle touch and mouth are for hers... so are toys.... Casanova didn't have women waiting outside his home because of his erection, hon.......

Get some books... tbuy some things by THE s*x therapist in the country today... Lonnie Barbach... cheap on Amazon, and yours by Saturday.... In paperback, even.

Answer 9

Sounds like you need to brush up on your love making skills and she needs to communicate a bit more in the bedroom. A lot of ladies fake o****m just to please the male and they aren't enjoying the s*x one bit, but they say nothing, so is your wife truly reaching o****m when you have s*x?.

Answer 10

Sounds like you guys need counseling.  Lovemaking is central to a marriage, as it reinforces the connection between the parties, and reaffirms the individual's desirability for each other.  Your wife obviously has some problems that need to be addressed by a professional.  

Answer 11

May I ask how you treat her outside of the bedroom?  Do you treat her with love and respect?  What do you do to show her how much you love her?  For women, love making is often a psychological thing as well as a physical thing.  If you treat her badly during the day, of course she is going to reject you at night!  You have to engage her mind, not just her body.  Tell her how beautiful you think she is, tell her how much you enjoy spending time with her, tell her how much you enjoy talking to her.  Let her know by your actions how you feel about her and the rest will follow.

Answer 12

Ask her if she loves you.  Ask her if you can look for it else ware.  She practically is forcing you to.

Answer 13

You poor guy,

Your probally doing your best for her, and she

just doesn't appriaciate it.

How sad.

Hopefully things will turn around, from the sound of it, things have gotten slowly better, but are just not totally fixed yet.

Good Luck

Answer 14

Maybe she does not like the way you touch her when you are not love making.  The way my fiance touches me when we are not having s*x aggravates me...to hiim he is trying to set the mood.  So maybe you should talk to her about how you touch her when not having s*x b/c this could be making her push you away, that is what I did.