I want a relationship with a 'player.' What can I do

Question

I really like a guy, he's smart and has really mature outlooks on life, but he doesn't want a relationship at all, he just wants to fool around with different girls. He acts so arrogant and cocky, but from the conversations we have at night with just the two of us, I can see that there is so much more to him. He was in a two year relationship with a girl he really loved and she cheated on him and broke his heart. That was about five months ago, and ever since then he has no desire at all to get close to a girl, except physically. I really want to change that. He's a great guy, I want him to see that he can have a relationship and trust a girl again. I'm a nice, caring girl and we've already kissed and had many deep conversations. I just want him to stop looking for a fling or hookup with no commitment, I'd love to be in a relationship with him.

I know no one can 'make' someone fall in love with them or trust them, but I want to try. I'd love to be with him, like I said. I don't think many people understand that he's a real guy with real emotions because he doesn't act like it, he just acts like he wants to get physical and that's all, but there's so much more than that.

Any advice? Thanks

Answer 1

Do you have any idea how pathetic and desperate you sound!

First and foremost.....players don't have relationships, they get their kicks from adding up how many girls they can have s*x with in the shortest amount of time.  You must be off in la la land if you think you can reform this guy to make you his one and only!

He'll play the game until he gets you in the sack and then you'll be history just like all the others!  Don't you think every girl he dates thinks she will be the one to "tame" him!!.......where are they now?  The same place you'll be if you fall for his act!

I don't really know what advice you're looking for.....you seem determined to set yourself up for a huge fall!

Personally, I want to be someone's only one, not one of many and I'm worth more than a one night stand who would be discarded in the morning when they were finished with me!

Have some class!!  some self respect!!  some common sense!!

Answer 2

DON'T LET HIM TOUCH YOU!!!

The moment you give in to his "charm", (and hook up with him), you're conquered, much less interesting, and no longer a challenge.

Tell him anything really good is worth waiting for, (and committing to, leave that part for later).

Luck

Answer 3

just tell him how you feel.

Answer 4

Well at least he is being honest, he obviously isnt over his ex and I dont blame him Im going through the same thing. He more than likely really cared about his ex and it hurts to have a broken heart im sure he likes you and doesnt mind your company but he is a guy and another serious girlfriend just isnt on his mind sweetie. I would just continue being friends get it through your head ok it just takes tim and look at it like this if he were to get with you right after a hard relationship all you would be is a rebound. So find someone that you dont have to force to fall for you or just someone who is ready.

Answer 5

i had the same problem kindaa but he was a wanna be cuz he was 13 lol but well anyways we were best friends for like 2 years and people even date his best friend just to make him jealous.. which is stupid.. and well i went out with him for like a day and he wanted me to ''Touch him'' you know and i wouldnt so he broke up with me and we havent had a really real conversation since then but he danced with me at a school dance for half a song than left and asked my best friend to dance with him i kno g*y well if this kinda sounds like the same situation dont do it........!!!