I want my parents to get a divorce?

Question

My parents argue about really random c**p. Actually it's just my dad, he has some sort of mental problem but he refuses to go see a doctor. He gets mad at my mom for trying to go learn art and tells her to quit her job. He's always like YOURE NOT RESPECTING ME and ****. My mom mentions getting a divorce a lot but she doesn't seem serious about it. I really want them to though. My dads ruining my life. I want them to get a divorce. I HATE MY DAD. Does anyone have any idea on how i should convince my mom to get a divorce? I really cant stand it anymore.

Answer 1

Yes this is the plan o fthe wemen.

Answer 2

tell him and your mum if he doesnt stop its either me or him you choose you can always go to your grandparents and still see your mum at times that way you put more pressure, him might even choose to change

good luck, stick up for yourself as much as you can!

Answer 3

talk to them and let them know how their arguing is affecting you. tell them that they either need to seek marriage counseling or get a divorce, b/c their current state is not working for you!

Answer 4

try and see things from both sides and say good things about them to each other as it cannot hurt the situation. After all they did love each other some time ago. Divorce is not the answer as it can be very lonely in the singles scene. You need to think of your own life as you cannot be there for your mum so do the best you can to find some sort of common ground so every one can have some peace. Hate is not the way to go. It takes up too much time and is not at all constructive. Being more helpful around the house may help. Asking questions from either of them will make them feel more involved. So good luck and try to be more optimistic and see good things in the people around you.

Answer 5

tell your mom to divorce him. tell her he says bad things about her

Answer 6

Welcome to the real world where people do stupid things for stupid reasons and there's nothing you can do about it.

I'm sure your house is not a pleasant place to be just now and I imagine you feel right in the middle of the tensions between your mother and father even if they do their best to keep you out of the arguments.

However, it's really not your place to persuade your mother to get a divorce just because you believe at the moment that getting your father out of the house would make your life happier and more comfortable. You may feel that it would be the best thing for your mother. You may even believe that you have a right to make it happen. But you need to understand that the relationship between your mother and father existed before you did and only they have the right to decide when it should end and how.

You say that you believe that your father is mentally ill and you hate him. This suggests to me a degree of emotional immaturity on your part. If he is indeed mentally ill, he is not responsible for his actions and so it is unreasonable to hate him for behaving as he does.

If you do indeed hate your father - if you honestly would rather see him dead - then I think you have some serious growing up to do. Emotionally mature people do not hate their parents. They may find their parents exasperating. They may find it very painful - or even impossible - to be with their parents. But they understand that their parents are fallible human beings and they're able to step back enough to understand why their parents do the stupid, annoying, infuriating things that they do.

I don't think any of us are required to love our parents, but I do think we should do our best to understand them, if only because that takes us a long way toward understanding ourselves and why we do the stupid things we all do.

I suspect it would be very difficult for you, but I really think you should try to keep as much distance - physical and emotional - as you can between you and your parents as they work out whatever it is that they're working out at the moment. If they start to argue, leave the room. If they're shouting so loud you can hear them in your room, let them know as calmly as possible that you're leaving the house until they finish and then quietly leave - no slamming doors or other displays of petulance. This won't solve their problem or yours, but it might make life a bit less difficult for you and there is a small possibility that you letting them know that their arguing is driving you out of your home might cause them to think again about what they're doing.

You say the arguments are about "random c**p". That indicates to me that you really have no idea of what's actually going on between your mother and father and what the arguments are really about. It's entirely possible that _they_ have no idea what's going on between them. That's how life often is and how relationships often work. But it's also possible that the arguing is really about things going on in their private lives that you don't know about, might never know about and really don't _want_ to know about.

If you do manage to keep some distance, then ideally you might be able to look at what's going on in a dispassionate way and start to understand the two people who happen to be your parents slightly better. You might even be able to start to make some decisions about things you'll always do and things you'll never do when you're in a serious, long-term relationship yourself.

Answer 7

Talk to her and tel her you want her to get divorce because the fight is ruining your life and your personality. and thats it. mom does not need more convincing than that. and maybe prayers that indeed she will get a divorce.

Answer 8

It's really not your call what your parents do.  He's not actually ruining your life.  Talk to your parents about taking their arguments away from you, but at the same time realize that it's got nothing to do with you.

Answer 9

Young Man let me tell you something in the bible it says "honor thy father and mother" and do you know what that means even if your dad is actin up that dosen't mean that your mother or father have 2 get a divorce okay listen if you go 2 church ill say pray if you don't then think about your life with out your dad and also leave it to your mother or father to make that decison not you  

Answer 10

just sit your dad down and tell him how you feel

Answer 11

counseling!! actually your dad needs a doctor...are you sure you want your father out of your life

if he has mental issues then you have to understand that instead of pushing him to the curb why not help him

make a negative situation into a positive one...your mother doesnt want a divorce because mainly its security and for you...there is always different routes to your life if you bump into bad situations...you just have to think about it and set it u with no bad intentions of hurting anyone or yourself

Answer 12

I'm truly sorry for your situation because I know how awful it must be for you. But getting into the middle of your parents problems isn't going to be good for any of you. It's hard for anybody to see his/her family falling apart. But it's not your problem to get involved in and it's not your place to get in the middle of your parents marital difficulties or try to influence them on whether or not to divorce. That's their responsibility to make that decision for themselves. Still, I know it's hard for you to stay neutral to the situation when it's badly affecting your life. Have you had a sit down talk with both of your parents about how much their fighting is hurting you? Maybe if you were to make the suggestion to both of them that you all see a family counselor together, they might go for it. It could be they just don't see exactly how this affecting you, so talk to both of them together about how you feel and how you're being affected by all this, WITHOUT making any suggestions about divorce or how they should fix their marital problems, that's for them to work out, the issue is how to remedy the situation in regards to how it affects you, because you shouldn't have to be hurt by their troubles. If this doesn't work, maybe you should try to fin d some place to stay temporarily. if possible. Do you have any relatives or friends that would let you stay with them just for awhile like maybe a month? This would give your parents time together to decide what they need do from here, and give you a break from their fighting. Best of luck and prayers to you hon.

Answer 13

Well after they fight and your dad is gone somewhere, sit down and have a talk. Tell her the facts of why you want the divorce. Tell her that you think she (and you) would be better of with out him.