I want to adopt my girlfriends son?

Question

We have recently had the joy of the addition of twins to my family and the discussion of me adopting my step son has come up. It is something i really want to do as me and my fiancee have been together for 3 years and living together for 18 months. I am living in the uk and am wondering what to do, where to start, who to contact 1st etc.... in the whole process.

My step son is 6 and since just before we met, his biological dad has not wanted anything to do with him at all. Any advice here would be most grateful.

Answer 1

Hi, I live in NI so I think the law might be a bit different than England but your situation is exactly the same as mine, I asked my solicitor about it and its quite straight forward as long as the biological **** doesn't protest but if he does it could cost about £10,000, I changed my sons name by deed poll 2 years ago and he is known everywhere as my now husbands surname which is great but we are going to leave the adoption for a few years down the line as we will have a better chance the longer the biological **** hasn't seen him, you should contact your local citizens advice and see if they have any info for you or as far as i know your first app with your solicitor is free or you may be entitled to legal aid

Good luck with whatever you do, you sound like a nice man

Answer 2

Im not sure what you have to do but im sure some people on here will.

I just wanna say that to a very good man to be doing this, not alot of men could.

Answer 3

I'm not sure of the process in the UK, but in the US we have to put an advertisement in the paper in several big cities in the area where the other biological parent resides.  The ad must state that the child is being considered for adoption and the parent must contact you if any objections to this adoption exist.

If there is no reply within a stated period of time, then the normal adoption process may begin.  However, if the other parent objects, then a lengthy court battle may ensue.

Check with your local Family and Children Services for any guidelines on adopting a child with two biological parents still alive.  They should be able to direct you to the initial process or provide listings for Juvenile courts where the process can be started.

Good Luck!!!

I think you're doing a great thing!

Answer 4

Get married.

Hey!  I'm not a moralist.  I'm just saying that the authorities may want to be convinced that your family will stay together to provide a stable home, etc.

Answer 5

Im sure you would have to contact the social services department at your local council or visit their website,im sure youll get all the help there.All the best to you and your loving family.

Answer 6

Marry her,he's yours!!

Answer 7

Im sure it would be the same as in the states. You would have to start by getting the biological dad to sign over his rights.

Answer 8

http://www.baaf.org.uk/info/firstq/adopt...

Answer 9

you will have to contact his real farther weather or not he has anything to do with him as he still has rights and will have to be asked    sorry hun  and get a good family lawyer

Answer 10

Firstly congratulations on the birth of your twins.  As a mother of twins I can appreciate what a joy they are even though it's twice the cost of everything (it's not surprising though that you can't afford the wedding just yet!)

Most solicitors will offer a free half hour appointment so take advantage of that and contact a local solicitor and ask for the family department

Also the citizens advice bureau is always really helpful and it's free but sooner or later a lawyer will have to be involved

It takes a good man to take on someone elses child.

ps  Have you joined TAMBA?  if not they are great and also put you in touch with companies that offer discounts to parents of twins triplets or more (Clarks shoes is a good one, with so many feet to shod!)

Good luck

Answer 11

Try contacting your local council and asking them for the family services and also a solicitor

Answer 12

I live in the US but my husband and I had to be married first before the courts would consider it (so we got married by the justice of the peace and continued on with our wedding plans).  Then we had to have the biological father's signed agreement to the adoption, which didn't take very long because it was that or pay child support so he got the papers back to us pretty quick.  All in all it was a pretty easy process, but you probably need to talk to a lawyer to get you on the right track.

Answer 13

You always have the option of going to the court house to have a quick wedding for legal reasons...it's your business no one else's. Then have a big wedding. I know a lot of people who do this for legal reasons but actually use the big wedding as their actual anniversary. Just a thought. I agree you are a rare man to do this. I think it's wonderful!

Answer 14

hi there im in the same situation my hubby wants to adopt my daughter ive looked into it loads theres not much help but what ive found on the nt is that u need to get in touch with ur nearest family court and they can get the forms sent out to u,u eed to give ur locall authority 3 months notice of ur intention to adopt iknow that u only need the bio fathers permission if he has parental responsibilitys but they might want to know his views (god knows why mine same as urs mines 7 and hes never sen her) hope this helps but if u type step adoption into google bar there is info there im in uk and found the court nerest us is chester and i rang them and they were helpfull,im sure u dont need to married either,there is a charge of i think £140 but depends on circunstances say tax redits u dont need to pay but again the court told me that,good luck hope this helps but if u can find much on line then find ur nearest faml court and im sure that they can help u x*x

Answer 15

Go to see a solicitor that specialises in family law. Does the birth father have parental rights? If he does, he will have to be contacted before the adoption can be allowed. My son and Daughter in Law were going through this process, but as they didn't want the birth father to know where the child was (due to his violence). He hadn't had any contact for 5 years. They didn't go through with it but change his name by deed poll, so all the family had the same name.

Answer 16

its easy enough to do, at least in the states. As long as the bio father is willing to terminate his rights. But in some areas you have to be married a couple years to adopt a step child. Not sure about your area.

Answer 17

i'm not quite sure how things work in the UK, but in the US you will have to first make sure that the bio-dad wants to terminate his parental rights.  most courts will only allow his right to be terminated involuntarily if he has a history of abusing the kid, abandonment, or neglect. i also does help if you and his mum are married.

i would check with your local social services department/solicitor  to get more information.

good luck