I want to emotionally detach myself?

Question

from a girl who's been my friend for 4/5 of my life.three years ago I developed feelings for her, hid them and now I haven't seen or heard from her since febuary.

for some reason I'm too afraid to call her.

I'm tired of spending a restless hour willing myself to dispell my fear and call her only to wake up and ignore the night.

I either want to confront my fears and call her as a friend for now

or forget it all.I'm done. And I dont want to forget but if I can't call I don want to tear myself apart.help please.

Answer 1

time is a good healer

Answer 2

i bet she misses you

call her

and talk

maybe she feels the same

Answer 3

This girl ment alot to you call her up  

Answer 4

If you call her, what is the worst thing that can happen?

She will hang up on you, or curse at you, or simply talk to you.  You are facing a situation in which you do not have control over the other person, and that is where the fear is generated from.  

Really, really, take a deep breath while lying on your back.  Fill the diaphragm at the bottom of your lungs with air and watch your abdomen rise as the air goes in.  Let it out slowly through your lips and feel the sensation of anxiety, worry, and fear leave your body through your slow exhale.

Now, write down a short monologue, a "rap" with the information you want to give her and the information you wish to ask her.  With a thought-out rap before making the call, you are mentally prepared for facing the fear of rejection on the telephone.  

Remove as much emotion as possible from your words, your speech, your inner motivation for making this call.  Remain calm, remain clear-headed so you can think during the call, and do not jump to conclusions or assume anything without checking with her to see if it is true, if you are intepreting her words correctly, whether she has another meaning, or if additional explanation is necessary for good, clear communication.  

Once you talk to her and get a sense of where she's coming from in regards to attitude about you, you will have more information on which to decide your next words, your next move, etc.  Do not lead this girl on by influencing her that you are interested in her a lot but only want to be friends.  That's a mixed message that creates confusion.  Simply talk to her just as you had planned and practiced  with the rap (monologue of explanation).  Sincerety goes a long way towards building trust and honesty between two people.

Answer 5

It takes a long time but if you stay away and not contact her, you will eventually get over her. If you start calling and stay friends, you'll torture yourself until you are away from her.  

Answer 6

Call her tomorrow :) You will feel better :)