In the past month, i've begun to struggle with life. I'm a college student and I had paper anxiety, so i put off doing an important paper. The fact that I couldnt do the paper made me so depressed that I actually thougth about suicide. I wanted to do so well in college and I suppose I reasoned to myself that if i couldnt write papers, then I was going to flunk out.
Today was the day that I had to go talk to the teacher about the paper. I didnt want to be interrogated...felt awful, like i had wasted her time.
Basically I've just given up trying to get good grades in order to impress family members and now see it as an opportunity to show the gifts God has given me. I'm taking it one day at a time and I want to give my life to God. I wasnt the one who made me and I clearly cant do college on my own.
I still feel really sad. I shouldnt be sad though, I dont think God wants me to be sad. I want to enjoy the life he has given me in order to "pay him back" for creating me in the first place. I want to be a new person.
I dont want to be sad anymore though. Its not worth it. Though i do want to keep in mind that the things i do in life are for God...not for me anymore
What is my question? Perhaps I have none, i just wanted to see what others felt about this on Answers.
I dont want any non christians to answer this question. If you do, i'll just give you a bad mark.
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