I want to hear the funniest things your kids have said...

Question

My wife picked me up from th egolf course the other day and I was complaining about ho wI played. ..just saying how frustrated I was and my three year old who is sitting in the back seat says.."I get frustrated when I dont get milk!!" LOL!!! what!?! How did he know how to even use that word!?? funny stuff.

Tell me your experiences

Answer 1

My son says some funny stuff.  He's 14 and still cracking us up.

When he was 3, though, from the back seat of the car he asked me, "Mommy, what do frogs mean?" How do you even answer that one?

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This story is a LOT more grown up but again, my son is 14 now and this just happened a month ago.

We had a package of baby back ribs thawing on the counter, and my son was running his hands over the frost on the package, trying to thaw the frost. My husband looked at him and said, 'you just want to rub my meat', and my son shot back, "Pedophile!" lmao

*disclaimer: my husband is not a pedophile. It was just a joke.

Answer 2

My three yr. old found a dead beetle bug in the house.  She presented it to me and said, "I think he needs new batteries."

Answer 3

My daughter is only 15 months, but I do have a story that I at least thought was funny....the other day I was getting she and I both into the shower.  She knows the difference between belly button, belly and boobie (thanks to daddy).  She will point to all three and say the correct word.  However, I am pregnant again, and with the pregnancy came a very quick (and substantial) size change in my 'boobies'.

Anyway, we were getting in the the shower and she pointed at her tummy and said "belly", then pointed at my boobie and said "belly".  I had to tell here that even though they are about the same size right now, they are definately different;o)

Answer 4

It wasn't my daughter, but her cousin. He came up to me while I was giving her a bath and said, "Why did her peepee fall off?"

Lmfao.

Answer 5

Mr. Mozz had been painting kitchen cabinets.  He was inspecting his work, and dabbing at parts of it.  You know those drips from thick paintbrush applications?  The ones that dry drip-shaped?  That's what he was dabbing.  He calls those drips, for lack of a better word, Boogers.

Gina, who was 4 at the time, was eating a snack at the table.  "Daddy?  What are you doing?"

"I'm wiping boogers off the cabinets."

"Well, it wasn't me."

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When my son was about 6 he came to me hysterical, "Mom!  Raymond is SOOOOO lucky."  Why's that Evan?  "He went on vacation and he visited George Washington's outhouse!"

"Oh my, that does sound lucky.  (Curious) Evan, what's an outhouse?"

"A summer home.  You know.  Like when you go out."

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I like Harry Belafonte because I like his style.  The kids like him because of the beat and because his lyrics are funny.  There's a song they love, "Mama a Boo-boo".  The song is hysterical.  It's about a guy that is so ugly - nobody likes him, his kids don't listen to him, etc.  The mama even tells the kids that it's their daddy and the kids say No way my daddy can't be that ugly.  Nobody could be THAT ugly.  All to the typical Harry Belafonte beat.  Gina - I guess - put all the pieces of the song together (she was about 2) and when she did she became upset.  "Mommy???  Nobody loves the Daddy?!"  I try to explain that it's not real and it's just a song.  She asks "Nobody loves MY daddy????"  Evan says firmly, "Gina. It's not a song about our Daddy.  Our daddy isn't ugly.”   He puts his arm around her comfortingly and as they begin to walk away, Evan explains, “It's a song about Uncle Mike…"

Answer 6

I was reading my then 4-year old son a bedtime story about dinosaurs he asked, "Mommy, when you were little, how did the dinosaurs get through the electrical wires in the street without getting hurt?"

Answer 7

That is so funny. Thanks for the laugh.

My stepson said, who do you think you are, Elvis Einstein?

Dad and sis just stopped and looked at him.

Sis said about ice fishing: How do they get the boat in there?

Sis heard crickets chirping: What's that? It's just crickets. Can they get me?

Answer 8

My son recently yelled from the back seat of the car where his younger sister was eagerly bothering him... "She's trying to get the goat out of me again."

We tried (unsucessfully) to keep the giggles to ourselves!

Answer 9

My parents moved to Georgia, and my son tells his pre-school teacher, "My BIG grandma lives in Georgia."

In Wal-Mart, by the little girls clothes, my 3 yr. old Eryn says, "Mommy, tell Wal-Mart to fire their designers." Why? What's wrong with the clothes? "They're not fashionable. I won't buy them."

When I was pregnant with the twins, my neighbor's youngest son then about 4 wanted to feel the babies moving. he laid his head on my belly, and got kicked hard in the jaw. he responded by telling me, "I thought you said there were babies in there!" Yes. "Those two are little monsters!"

Went to a birthday party for a 2 yr. old boy who's friends with my twin girls. He was holding each of them by the hand, and when I tried to take my girls away he shouted, "MINE!"

Answer 10

My son is only 16 mo, but a few months ago, I was showing him a picture book with animals.  We looked at the picture of the pig and I asked him "Can you say pig?"  He looked right at me and said "dada?"  

Answer 11

I was babysitting one time and we were in the car for a very long trip, 2 kids sam was 2 and ryan was about 6 months old. The mom always calls ryan bunny. So were in the car and ryans crying histarically and Sam puts her arm over him and shes like "sorry bunny, sorry, it's okay bunny"

Answer 12

my special guy friends daughter said to me a few months ago when i was about to take a shower...."can I watch?' shes 5...then just last week when were fishing she came over to me and was hanging on me and said "what color is your bra?" I just laughed...I'm like what? too cute.

Answer 13

my little girl calls down below a mini once in the car i spotted a mini {car} and said to my daughter daddy used to have a mini it wasnt untill later i realised why she gave me a very funny look..........

Answer 14

Alice (5)....."Grandma has a BOYFRIEND?"\

Jacelyn (10)..... "No, she has a husband, named GRANDPA."

Answer 15

not my kid, but it was still funny.

i was helping to teach a preschool class and one of the little boys came up to me and said ever so sweetly, and kinda like he was worried "teacher, i think somebody left their cricket".

there was a dead one behind the door.