I want to travel to South Korea to find my birth mother...?

Question

I don't have that much information on her but I know how old she was, some of her personality characteristics, and some of her physical characteristics. I'm 15 years old, and I know that I have to wait till I'm 18, right?, the adoption agency I'm from has a travel to Korea program, (i don't remember the name of the agency but my adoptive parents would) I know that my mother had Hepatitis C and that I look like her, well similar. Going off this informaiton would I have any chance of finding her. She had a closed adoption, and I know that she might not want anything to do with me, I just want to see what she looks like and ask her one question. That would be enough for me, just to know what she looks like in person and why she gave me up. I've always wondered this ever since I found out I was adopted and I always wanted the chance...is this possible or just a far off dream?

Answer 1

I can't really help you since I didn't use an agency to find my original mother.

She probably misses you very much and loves you, but she has her own life now so be prepared for what you might discover.

Don't give up the possibility, though. Any chance of finding her is better than none.

ETA: My parents kept all my adoption files. I noticed something called "administrative address" and I thought that might be it. Mom said it wasn't, but after a few weeks I told her it wouldn't hurt to try and send a letter.

So I used Babelfish and typed out a letter. At the time I didn't know any Chinese so I have no idea how strange the translations were. Then I sent it off to the address in both romanization and Chinese characters and prayed like crazy. I was expecting it to be returned with an "invalid address."

I don't want to scare you, but I just thought you should know: I also mentally prepared myself to get a note saying "I'm glad you're well but please don't contact us again."

You don't know what you'll find at the other end. You don't know where they are, how they live, what their response will be if they decide to respond, etc. In the letter, I wrote down, "If you want to communicate with me, please respond. If you do not, I will understand. Please let me know." I left the door open for them in case they ever DID receive my letter.

As I said, if you're initating a search, I can't help you with that. If you manage to find their address, then I'd be happy to help you write a letter IF you want. It's up to you, obviously. Just letting you know the help is available if you so choose.

Answer 2

Oh wow I think it's great you know some things about your bmom.  Good luck & I'm curious as well.

I never cared too much in looking but the more I get involved in this site the more curious I have become...I am also from South Korea except I was abandoned with my name tag & birthdate..so I know that I have to start with the adoption agency.

I have a Korean friend that said that Korea had this Korean-American adoptee reunion show.  NOt that it will help but it sounds lke that it's definitely possible to find your birth mom. Best of luck to you.

Answer 3

We adopted both of our children from Korea, and I know that the agencies in Korea have a file for each adoptee, which holds a lot more information then your parents would have recieved when you were adopted, including the birth parents names. Something makes me think that you may not have to be 18 to access your file, but you would need to travel to Korea. I know there are our agency has 'heritage tours' for adoptees, I think you have to be 18 to go by yourself, but you could also go as a family.

We were able to meet several young adult adoptees who had gone on the trip, and they said it was amazing. Only one of them was able to locate his birthmother, but the others still said it was wonderful to have the additional information. They also were able to see where they were born, and spend their first few weeks, and mee their foster mothers.

Just contact the agency yo were adopted through, or have your parents, and find out the details. If they are not helpful, you could also contact the agency in Korea that the US agency partners with. (either Eastern, Holt, SWS, or KSS)

I wish you the best of luck in your search!

Answer 4

Knowing agencies in Korea about 18 yrs ago, it was likely a closed adoption because she was given no other options.  in fact, most mothers who surrender children to adoption do so because they feel they have (or they are given) no other options.  I agree with the previous poster that she likely thinks about you and misses you every day.

Contact the folks at http://www.transracialabductees.org/ and they might be able to help you.

Also read the article here http://www.transracialabductees.org/poli... entitled "Babies For Sale" about the baby trade in Korean babies -- the most telling sentence is how mothers are coerced into surrendering:  "At first, the women do not want to give up their babies. According to the questionnaire that we distribute at the orientation interview, 90 percent want to keep the babies, says Kim Yongsook, the director of Ae Ran Won. But after counseling, maybe 10 per cent will keep them."  This means that counselling is directed at convincing mothers to surrender their babies.

Answer 5

i am 15 too and i'm adopted from croatia. i don't feel comfortable talking about my adoption with my parents but i had so many questions. and i wanted the same exact thing as you did; i just wanted to see what my birth mother looked like and why she gave me up. i went behind my parents back and found my adoption papers which gave me alot of information but still not enough to answer all of my questions. i want to go to croatia to find her but i'm too young of course and my parents probably wouldn't let me. but for your situation maybe you could contact the agency and ask them for some information or just ask your parents about it.. if u have any questions or just want to talk or anything just contact me. sorry i wasn't much of a help =/

Answer 6

Maybe there are some links here that could help you:

http://www.aaawashington.org/a_resources...

edited to add: - also look into this group:

http://groups.yahoo.com/group/koreanadop...