I was planning on leaving my girlfriend but we just found out she is pregnant?

Question

I know it would be evil to leave her now but I am so unhappy and miserable with her. I don't know what to do. I want to do the right thing and man up to my responsibility but I don't think I can bare to be with her anymore. any advice?

Answer 1

Do not stay together just for a kid.. The kid would suffer from all that...Just tell her how you feel, be there for her and pay child support.

Answer 2

You shouldnt stay with someone because they are pregnant, then you are doing it for all the wrong reasons. She might be mad about it at first, but as long as you let her know that you will be there for her all the way and you will step up to the plate, she will slowly lose the anger. In the end she will thank you....nothing is worse on a child than when their parents part after being born.

Answer 3

Tell her exactly what you just put in your question. Your not happy but you will always be there for her no matter what.

Answer 4

Staying together just for the child is the wrong thing to do. As the years progress the child will feel like they are responsible for your unhappiness. The best thing to do at this point is to end the relationship. You can still man up and be a dad without being with her. Just make sure you're there for stuff like the prenatal appointments (if she wants you there) and other things that are important to her. And under no certaint terms are you to miss the birth that would be HUGE. Especially since it's mandetory for her.

You will want to remain friends with each other. That will make raising this child so much easier for both of you. No worries if the other parent is bashing you behind your back or anything.

Talk to her tell her how you feel. That the relationship isn't working out but you still want to be a dad. And that you hope you can be friends if for no other reason that the child.

Good Luck!

Answer 5

If you are unhappy, then you should do something about it. I'm glad that you plan on being their for your child, most kids don't even get that. You don't need to be a couple to raise a child. Children go through life thinking it was their fault that their parents split, so instead of putting your child throught that later, you need to take care of it now, making everyone happy in the long run. You deserve to be happy.

Answer 6

you can brake up with her, but you should consider being there for her as a friend, and def for the baby.

Answer 7

Definitely be there for the baby, like you said. But if you feel like you really can't take any more, then it would be in both of your best interests to break up.. Just make it be on a good term, cause you're still gonna be taking care of the same baby.

Answer 8

You'll get no sympathy from me.  You should have thought of that when you were doing it raw and letting pleasure blind your judgment.  Now you have to be a real man and live with that mistake for the rest of your life.  Don't you dare think of bailing out on her and leaving that kid without a father.  In no way does he/she deserve to grow up without knowing his father because you're too stupid to have safe s*x.  Congratulations, you ****** up.

PS.  Let's not take advice from people who can't spell "break" right?

PPS. I love it how I'm besieged by thumbs down because I'm not telling people what they want to hear in a sugar-coated answer of feel-good inspiration.  Life isn't a S****y American patriotic film.  Welcome to the real world.

Answer 9

Way to go JOEL, I agree 100%. Try to work it out, sit her down and figure out what you guys can do to make it work and sometime you have to agree to disagree. Anyways life it's always butterflies and rainbows remember. It takes WORK and COMPROMISE!!!!!!! Ball up and be a man, there are sooo many kids that have dead beat fathers it's unreal. My sons biological father is one of them, he doesn't work and won't pay child support and he doesn't want anything to do with my son because of me, that's just not right. Don't be a stat.

Answer 10

she probaby is expecting you to leave and is probably more miserable than you. so stay with her and give her emotional support

Answer 11

honestly its not fair on the child if you stay because it wont work and then the child will suffer in years to come just make sure your as supportive as you can be

Answer 12

I agree with the above. You dont need to stay with your partner if your not happy or suited but be there for the child and reassure her that you will be etc

Answer 13

You can still break it off with her but when you do you have to reassure her that you will be there for the baby and take your responsibility seriously. You can't stay with someone you are not happy with just because of a child, it will not work.

Answer 14

Just because she is pregnant doesn't mean you have to be with her. As long as you take care of YOUR child.

Answer 15

You should be honest with her. She can most likley since somethings up anyway. You just need to make sure she understands you are going to be there for the baby. The sad part is you may not be able to bare being with her anymore but in a since you now will be somewhat with her every day for the rest of your life because you are both sharing a child who will need you both for many years to come.

Answer 16

Just because she's pregnant does not mean you have to stay with her. As long as you're willing to be there as a father once your baby is born and take care of your responsibilities then you can live your life with her as your baby's mother... not as your girlfriend.