I was raped and chose to have the baby.When should she(my daughter) be told?

Question

she asked when she was five and I did nolt tell her only that her daddy was nol in the picture and that I will always love her enough to make up for that. But now she is a teen and my mother thinks she should be told so that she will conduct herself with modesty around boys.. I am confused to say the least, scared shewill feel like a burden or unwanted - when clearly it took all the gumption and love I had just to have her.I was pushed towards abortion so I wanted her for sure.

Answer 1

whenever you feel she is at an age she can handle it

Answer 2

dont! just say he is dead or something

Answer 3

personally, I think she's going to be upset you waited so long to tell her.

why tell her at all now. It will just upset her, and she'll most likely feel like you've been lying to her.

Answer 4

NEVER.....some secrets are best kept. I'd never want to know I was a devistating effect of sexual torture of my mother. DONT RUIN HER LIFE!!!!!

Answer 5

whenever she is mature enough to understand, or when she asks.

Answer 6

I think that you should wait until YOU see that she is mature enough to handle things. It can really confuse her in this most insecure time in her life. As a teen she is already feeling doubts about her friends, family, as well as herself.

You can share with her that when you were younger you had something terrible happen to you and you are trying to teach her how to conduct herself so that she would know how to handle herself in every situation.

If you decide to tell her, also explain to her that every good thing comes from God, and that she was no mistake. She is a testimony of how God can take a bad situation and make good come from it.

No matter what she is loved and what happened to you was not her fault and that she is your strength and you love her more than ever, and if it happened again, you would still chose to have her over an abortion any day!!!

Good luck and God bless

Answer 7

why give a child or person that burden....never tell her  

how would you feel if you found out your  dad was a rapist

she does not have to know

Answer 8

NEVER. why would she need to kno that? if she ever asks about her dad say he left yall wen he found out u were pregnant. and that u dnt kno were he is.