I would like to know how i would go about finding my birth mother?

Question

i was born may 18th 1974 at 1:15 am in sysosset ny, nassau county town of oyster bay i know my mother was born in puerto rico and she was a catholic i believe my mother was born 1958 i dont have the month she had given birth to me when she was 16 yrs old and an adoption agency name spence-chapin handled my adoption i have 3 younger siblings 2 sisters and one brother and i know my birth grandmother had a stroke i believe 5 yrs ago now this information that i have is what the adoption agency gave me when i wrote them. they didnt give me my birth mother name so i wanted to know can anyone help me with this? is there a list or something that i can find out all the babys born in syosset that yr apparently my adoption was closed and i believe i have the right to know who my birth mother is. and last my given name at birth was kenneth joseph smith and my feet i believe were forced outward and i had exzema when i was a baby. hopefully some one will help me

Answer 1

ask ur adoptve parents if they know anything

Answer 2

try myspace

Answer 3

Hi Sean....I was adopted also and it took me a long while but at the end it was worth the wait. Unfortunately for me and the trouble I encountered was that my adoption had been sealed to where not even me or an attorney could get it opened. When an adoption is sealed and closed that is exactly what it means. This reason behind this ..is to protect the mother if she wished to be not found. Now my grandmother before she passed told me my mothers first name, this was fine but I needed to know her last name as well. My adopted parents would never disclose my mothers name when I was growing up. About 12 yrs ago I asked my adopted mother if she new my mothers last name and she finally told me. So with the info that my grandmother had left me and taking what my adopted mother gave me I went searching. My first idea was to hit the phone book and look under the last name in which I was given. Was that ever a job! My mothers last name was very common to where there were at least 50 or more names that were exactly like my mothers...lol I never could find my mothers first name so I called every last one of the names in the phone book that was the name of my mother. I got lucky. I found my mothers niece in the phone book and went from there. I found out that I had two sisters and 3 brothers. Unfortunately my mother had passed away in 1982 and I went to her graveside to let her know that I had found her and that I loved her just as much. I also told her that I didn't blame her for placing me up for adoption. So...don't give up hope in finding your mother. Try to find a relative or a friend that might have known her. Check the birth records for that year, it may or may not be listed due to the adoption case. Did you know the fathers name? Sometimes if you find the father then he could probably tell you about your mother but thats like finding a needle in the hay stack too. Try to find out your grandmothers name, now if she had a stroke and she still survived you might be able to still find out where she lives. If she passed the only way you can find a relative then is going to where she was buried. Usually the people who assisted with the funeral arrangements have names of family and friends. I hope you don't have to go that route. Also you could join one of those websites such as Ancestry.com and place your blog on their website and I bet you might be able to get some answers. Good luck in your quest. Keep the faith and I wish you well. Have a blessed day!

Answer 4

have you tried looking at adoptions.com?

Answer 5

Oh I hope that you find your mother.  My brother was adopted, but not done through an agency.  Have you thought about contacting someone like Montel or someone who might be able to investigate all the information that you have?  Good luck to you!

Answer 6

<< is there a list or something that i can find out all the babys born in syosset that yr >>

This actually used to be a method that some folks used to find their birthmothers, but due to Identify Theft, this option has been closed.

You just have to find a lot of adoption registry sites to list your birthdate information.  If she or another family member is looking, they can find you that way.  It can really be involved.  I accidentally found my son earlier this Spring. He's had a website since 2000, but it was only because I added a different word to the search engine that it ever came up.   Don't forget to add yourself to state specific registries and include CA (lots of people moved there) as well as Puerto Rico (she may have gone back).

I should add that one poster is wrong. Adoptions are CLOSED not because the mother doesn't want to be found but because that is how the adoption agency/group chose to do that adoption.  In some cases, it was by law.  Many adoptions were due to abject poverty, lying by the agency personnel and parents forcing their daughters to give up children so they wouldn't be embarrassed.  I do think adoptees should be able to get this information as adults.

Answer 7

One of the resources which I would use, is the local State

Senators Office. They know the laws, concerning adoption,

and being reunited with birth parents. Next I would seek

advice from Legal Aid.

Go to the Library and find out the Resources for placing

your name on a List with others, which is listed in Washington

D.C., of persons seeking connections to birth bloodlines.

You can also write a letter to an Editor of a newspaper in

the general areas of where you were born too. Someone

may have remembered something about the incident or

know of any relatives you may have.

Yes, I do believe that you have a Right to be connected to

Your blood lineage, esp. for medical reasons too.

You have a lot of information to go on, in your search..

You can file a court order/request to have your adoption

birth records file opened, so you can have information you

need, and Also, you can go to the Social Security Dept.

and see if they will allow you to write a letter to your birth

mother, and have it mailed to her. They do this service at

no cost to you.

You might seek out the Guidance from the Nearest Catholic

Church Priest, since your birth mother may still be a member

of one of the churches of that denomination.

I hope this helps.  Sincerely, TF

Answer 8

cant you contact the adoption agency and find out????  get all you info together and contact hem

good luck and god bless

Answer 9

If you non-id is 5 years old I would request it again.  You may be more or different details this time.  It depends on who opens the file and what information they view as important or worthy to send.  Some send the information exactly as it is in the file and others may just give pieces.

At that time request if you can have a consent to contact notation put in your file on the chance that if someone from your birth family tries to get information from you there will not be any delays in contacting you.

1st thing you should do is register with  isrr.net  This is free adoption reunion registery and the most widely used.

Also register with any state sponsored registries as well as any private run online state specific registries.  

Finally register is as many online registries as well.  Here are a few that I recommend

registry.adoption.com

findme.org

http://www.aci.net/schaefer/page60.html   (Gs adoption registry)

Outside of the New York City counties there are not any birth indexes available for public viewing that I am aware of.

Best of luck

Answer 10

I'm sorry, i really dont have any words of advice for you, but i do wish you the best of luck in finding your birth mother..