Question:

I wrote a poem, but I think it's weird. Opinions please?

by  |  earlier

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Don't be too harsh. I barely write and today I just felt like doing something creative. I'm 15 by the way.. not that it matters.

Just wanted opinions and suggestions. Thanks. =]

It’s past 3 o’clock and I’m sitting in the rain

I thought I knew you well but I will surely take this blame

All these things I imagined

And all the images of you

These wonderful feelings I thought were real

But they will never come true

You tried to get to know me

But who I am is not what you think.

I pushed you away like I always do

My life will never change

I thought we had a chance

I believed you were my missing piece

The first person in so long

And now we won’t be seen

I blame myself for all of this

And still want to be with you

My feelings constantly change

I won’t ever know the truth

We had a chance and we still do

I’d like to know what you feel

Because my feelings will never hide

These small little feelings that have been dreadful inside.

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6 ANSWERS


  1. Your very talented, WOW, I am in my 30's and best i can do is roses are red.


  2. Ye i thought it was good

    I struggle to write poetry

    i can write stories and all sorts, and i'm not stupid.

    I just CAN'T write songs or poetry.

    At all.

    So you did great lol.


  3. No, there is nothing weird here at all, Just the emotions you feel about a possible relationship that you were scared to accept.

    The fact that you wrote it down and achieved a creditable poem is encouraging, keep writing.

    On the other front, if you really want to know this other person better, then go and ask them out! The worst that can happen is they say no, the best is a lifelong relationship. Hmmmm, tough call.

    Good luck.

  4. its very heart felt but i think it would be better if it followed a certain beat or rhythm. also, I'm pretty sure ive heard poems like this a billion times. change it a little to make it more interesting.

  5. There is something here in what you write - keep going and putting thoughts and feelings into the words.

    It is a great beginning effort, more than many ever do, who think about it and never try it out.

    Thanks for putting it out here!  =)

  6. Very song-ish. Its beautiful but is common. :( You should spice it up a little bit more. Make it unique. :)

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