I wrote these song lyrics, do they sound corney?

Question

they are supposed to kinda sound like little bit longer by the jonas brothers(nick) its actually to a friend of mine....i want to show it to him...but i don't know if i should just yet

here they are

we met a year ago

[a little bit longer by my side]

there were things i did not know

[a little bit longer by my side]

but now i re-a-lize

[chorus]

(-not part of the song-this firstrt fo the chorus kinda sounds liek i miss you by miley cyrus)

i love you

but now i know

(srry to ceep adding like this but now its my own style of tune)

you will never love me back

no,no,no

(and then im still fiing the middle here but this is the end)

now that you know

i know you just wont show

but im sorry

i will try

to forget you

*spoken*

but we can still be friend right?

thats all i have....how si it?

how can i improve?

any ideas for lyrics?

rate it?

Answer 1

WELL  Personally i wouldnt rate it until you have completed it completely

Answer 2

thats a no no no

you will never succeed your dreams

Answer 3

yea billy rae's ackhy breaky heart daughter?

Waco type person?

Yea, suits the situation, actually thought they were obsessively possesively typical of the movie anger management but they is polite aint they and well intended, you go gal, good luck! Oooops never good luck neck and leg break given the last comment needed explaining!

Take care sounds interesting?

Answer 4

corny **** right therr.

jk. DONT POST THIS!

PEOPLE WILL STEAL THEM AND SAY THEY WROTE IT AND BECOME FAMOUS!

these are very good :)

Answer 5

well i guess there good if your friend likes miley cyrus and jonas brothers

Answer 6

it's kinda corny. But it's alright. All your brackets make it hard to read. It's too short for a song really.

Answer 7

why dont you ask mah bawlz how much they care.