IS this an obsession?

Question

After a difficult controversial friendship we decided to end our relation. I continue to think of him and I control daily my mail . I know it is better for me to be away from him because his dual behavior was upsetting me, and he refused to give my feelings more consideration.

Am I obsessive because I miss him and I cannot stop thinking of him?

Answer 1

Not obsessed, just still have unresolved feelings that will heal with time....

Answer 2

no

Answer 3

Sounds like you just have unresolved feelings towards him.  Try writing them all in a regular letter & mailing it to him to see if it helps to make you feel better.

Answer 4

i think you just need some time to accept the situation and get over it.

you still have feelings for him, even if he disappointed you.

it's normal to feel this way.

Answer 5

If it was two weeks ago then no, if it was twenty years ago - yes.

Answer 6

What do you mean by you "control daily your mail"? if you mean you're emailingn or writing to him every day, then yes, you are being obsessive. If you were stalking him, or watching him, or trying to get information about him from others, i'd say you were obsessive.

I guess it depends on how far you take it. If you just miss him and can't stop thinking of him, see how you feel in six months. If in six months you feel the same way, talk to a counsellor about it.

Ending a relationship can be as traumatic for some people as having someone die. There is a grieving process to go through because when you end a relationship, you do lose something, something which you valued and treasured and loved, and you don't get it back with the same person.

Only you know for sure if you're being obsessive. It sounds like you are concerned, so maybe try to go for a few days without thinking about him, and see what happens.