If, at 40, your spouse gets his/her first tattoo, does that mean he/she is tramping it up?

Question

My wife just came back from a visit to Central Florida because she said she "needed a break" -- even though she is on leave from work as a defense attorney because of some ethics investigation and because she's running for office against the District Attorney who has been the bane of her existence since she started defending the high-profile people he prosecutes.

To my surprise -- well, nothing surprises me anymore, really -- I was watching her wash some dishes last night in a tank top and there was a big tattoo on the back of her shoulder -- what looks like a vixen biker chick wrapped around a Christian T-shaped cross with a dagger-like bottom to it. The vixen had a sultry, erotic look on her face. The tattoo was also quite red and fresh.

I rarely curse, but blurted out, "What the f___ is that?"

"Oh," she said coyly. "Ma and me were at the county fair and thought it would be cute to get tattoos. She got a Deadhead bear. I've always wanted one. Don't worry. No one will see."

She always wanted one? I don't recall her ever saying that. In fact, she used to say when some tatted up dude would walk by at the beach, "I guess he spent his rent money on that. Wonder what it will look like in 10 years?"

Being an artist myself, I'd often agree with her as to the lack of merit most tattoos seem to have as far as making a statement.

But there she was, washing dishes, with her four-month-old pregnant belly pushing against the sink, with a big tattoo, all swollen looking.

(Before you wonder about the health of the baby, it's more than likely not mine -- we were broken up for a bit when it was revealed she was having an affair with a tatted up guy called Timdawg.)

In any case, she's 40. Our relationship hasn't been so great since she moved back in with the kids and me and decided to run for office.

Does getting a tattoo midlife mean that she could be ready to tramp it up -- again?

Answer 1

What do you think? You should know her better than the people who answer this, but sometimes it seems like you hardly know her at all.  It does sound as though she has a bit of a wild side to her.  Whether this means she is ready to "tramp it up" or not is anyone's guess.  Unless she always wears any tops that don't show the back of her shoulder in public, I don't see how she can say no one will see it.  I personally don't care for tattoos, but a lot of people do. Your wife is one of those people who like them and she is probably very proud of it. This is just my opinion, but my first thoughts when I read this were negative.  If you two were serious about getting back together, this is something that most people would at least tell their spouse about before they went out and got it.  It seems as though you both are biding your time in this reconciliation attempt and that it isn't being taken seriously by either of you. I think what you are really wondering is whether she is taking up with Timdawg again.

Answer 2

I think it means she doesn't want to be turning 40.  I think she wants to still feel young and vital.

The baby's health doesn't concern you b/c it probably isn't yours?  What kind of attitude is that?

It sounds like she's in a rebellious stage, and the more you try to control her, the more she will push you.

If you don't love her, if you don't trust her, get out of the relationship and let her have her own life and you live yours.

Good luck.

Answer 3

This is the craziest post ever...anyway, she is really smart for waiting and getting something she really wants.

Answer 4

Absoloutely not. Some ppl get tattoo's really just for the h**l of it. Where as other people get them to relieve pain. She might have done it to keep herself from doing something. I don't want this to sound bad but you sound pretty hostile towards her, but it sounds like you'd have a reason to be. You really need to talk to her. But as far as a tattoo meaning she's going to tramp it up, no it doesn't mean that.

Answer 5

If she is carrying some one else's baby I would say the tattoo is the least of your problems. Sounds like she hit the mid life crises and is afraid of getting old.

Answer 6

I have realized you and your lamely written soap opera plot are completely full of p**p.

I would not call tats trampy, but taking up the as* from Timdawg probably was.

Answer 7

I don't think this means she's tramping it up. She may have just been in a good mood and decided to do something crazy. Did you ask her (nicely) what the significance of her artwork is? That would be interesting to find out and probably more telling.

If your relationship is on the rocks, I'd focus on the actual relationship issues and not worry about the tattoo. That's kind of like missing the forest b/c you're focusing on the trees.

Answer 8

No, at "40" you are ready to do what you want to do. Sound like a tatted guy maybe involved.  Ask more probing questions.  You can always contact, "CHEATERS", and have her staked out.    

Answer 9

It means she might be having a midlife crisis.  

You know, the same thing dudes that age do when they buy sports cars, get hair replacement surgery, and generally try to recapture youth.

Answer 10

MS KITTYKAT - YOU ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Yep, glad I got my boots on today, the cowplop is gettin' mighty deep!

Answer 11

Lol, not necessarily but it sounds like you guys need some help.  How do you not notice a tattoo on your wife's shoulder?  How long did it take you to notice?  So let me get this straight, she's 40, 4-mnths pregnant, on leave because of an "ethics investigation," had an affair, has a biker tattoo (and she's trying to get into politics?).......Do I need to go on?  Get some counseling as a family and a couple.  Good luck!

Answer 12

she's bored, and wanting to recapture her youth, also her life seems to be in a complete mess...maybe she fancied doing something drastic and radical.

Answer 13

Not in this case.  It just sounds like she's showing a little bit of independence.  It's a shame she had to do it in such a permanent way.   You could install a stripper pole in the basement as a hint that perhaps she's acting a little trashy lately (especially after the lawnmower incident).  

Answer 14

She probably was feeling old and wanted to feel young again.  So many people follow now a days.  They think well everyone is getting one so I am too.  I for one will never get a tattoo.  My husband has no tattoos.  I have seen some that are cool but I wouldn't want to put anything permanent on my body.  I remember in the 70's it became a big thing to get a tattoo and then a even bigger thing to remove them.  

Oh by the way I am only 39 we will see what happens next year lol

Answer 15

I have 5 tats, not big nasty ones that everyone can see, just a few here and there. There is nothing wrong with the tattoo at 40. However, she is prego with another mans baby who is covered in tats and took a vacation to take a break (from you I assume). If you ask me the tattoo is the least of your worries! I think anything right now is a sign.

Answer 16

no tats are fricken awesome and she's expressing herself, LET HER fror christs sake

Answer 17

it appears that you have the answer already she would have to be a tramp without the tattoo simply because she is more than lilely pregnant with Timdawg's kid and so the Florida trip with mom was probably a trip with Timdawg and he talked her into it Dude I would want a DNA when the baby was born to be sure and if she left you once you should have known not to take her back it seldom works

Answer 18

I don't have a tattoo but I've always looked at them as "personal statements" of the individuals that get them.  She's trying to say something.  What does her tattoo symbolize? Ask her and you'll have your answer.    

Answer 19

I can't comment on the rest of your relationship, as it sounds like you have a lot of problems completely separate from this, but as for the tattoo by itself.....I wouldn't worry about it. If she is 40 and it came out of the blue, I would attribute that more to a midlife crisis than anything else.

Answer 20

Naw, I think that she's just probably bored with her life and wanted to spice things up within the confines of your relationship together.  Nothing wrong with that. :-)