If I am a psychological parent can the mother pull the child away and leave the state?? Please help me.?

Question

I met my ex fiance 3.5 years ago and she had a 16 week old daughter. Bio-dad was out of picture. We dated for 6 months and moved in together, I have been Alysa's father since she was 3 months and have been 100% financially and emotionally involved with her ever day of her life. She is a major Daddy's girl and we have a bond like no other. My ex and I were suppose to be married July 5th, until she cheated 5 days before our wedding and told me that This guy gives her 100% of his attention and that I give Alysa more attention than her. She said she misses all of the attention. We together even filed for step parent adoption 2 months ago, and now she wont let me see or talk to Alysa at all. She said she will not allow Alysa to have another mother some day, and that Alysa will call someone else Daddy within 6 months to a year. I have been devastated by all of this, first losing Amanda and now my child. People are saying I can be a psychological parent and get visitation.What are my rights?

Answer 1

I think you got nothing, and that's too bad because you sound like you really care.  You weren't married.  You're not the legal father.  Dollars to donuts that woman is going to raise the girl to be just like her momma.

Next time get married and then have children.  That way you won't have this problem.  Even though it hurts, you need to let it go.

Answer 2

Pray, pray, and pray some more. This is a child in a mess that a child should not be in. Ask God to reveal Himself to you in this situation and don't quit asking Him to until you are for certainly, certain that He has and then act upon what He shows you one step, one day, one prayer at a time. You are in this child's life for a reason. Don't quit on this child, never quit on a child not ever!

Answer 3

wow i dont know but thats horrible. that woman sounds like a real *****... if she cared for her little girl at all she would not do that to her. thats so sad. best of luck to you

Answer 4

Well i don't know what your rights are since you haven't legally adopted her.

But i just want to say that i'm sorry for the situation you are in. Your ex sounds like a selfish *****. Sorry, but that is horrible what she did to you. She should have been glad that she found a man that wanted to be a father to her child.

I would talk to a lawyer and see what you can do. Good luck.

Answer 5

ok..so this is woman is now on dude #3 that she wants to play daddy, and has no problem running in and out of court to file step parent adoption papers...and...

seriously, girly sounds like a hot mess.  her focus appears to be more about her self-gratification and not her child.  also, i question situations like this when the dad miraculously disappears; yet, the woman repeats bad behaviors or creates drama in future relationships.  in other words, there might be a reason why dude #1 left...and i don't anticipate dude #3 sticking around too much longer.  needy adults who require 100% of someone's attention are usually not very attractive for long.

but...since you are not the child's biological nor adoptive father, there's not too much you can do....

don't know too much about "psychological parenting", but i honestly believe that a little psychological something would be beneficial here...for this little girl's sake.

good luck.

ps.. you should be commended for attempting to parent this little girl...

Answer 6

I'm not sure that you have any rights since she isn't your bio daughter and you didn't adopt her.  But I would talk to a family lawyer and see what your options are.

Answer 7

I think you shouldn't focus on you poor relationship with the child's mother nor use it as an excuse to justify how "bad" of a person you think she is.  

If I was in her place I would allow you to come over and visit but definitely not let you "play house" when you decide to get into another relationship. It will only confuse the child and interfere with her decision to move on.

I know its painful but maybe if you got some grief counseling it might help. Its her child and she's looking at the big picture and whats best for the situation.

Answer 8

Go and talk to a lawyer. My ex had a daughter he payed support for and had regular visitation with. Then the mother decided he didn't need to see her. He took her to court for visitation and a paternity test. The test showed he was not the father. Regardless of the test results he had raised and been in this child's life since birth. She looked upon him as her dad. He took her to court and because of the support he had provided, the bond of father and daughter, and the fact that she had lied to him about paternity he won visitation.