If I had a threesome with 2 girls and 1 is noww getting married, does the husband to be have a right to know??

Question

My wife and I have had several threesomes with a good friend of ours who is now getting married in a mormon temple. Am I morally obligated to say something to this man if she chooses not to tell him?

Answer 1

Quit bragging!  Why on earth would you be obligated to tell him?  She's not married to him yet.  Your past should be just that, the past, don't drag it all out just to ruin her future.  To tell you the truth, I don't believe you have had any 3somes with her, because most people in the swinging lifestyle aren't tattle tales like you apparently are, they are usually very discreet and non-judemental.  I know one or two of them personally, and they certainly aren't self righteous like you are.

Answer 2

ummmm, no.

Answer 3

what are you going to do brag that you banged her??

MYOB

Answer 4

No! These are things that she feels that she would like to keep to herself or bring to her "New" husband when she feels such a time. You have no obligation to do so. It is her past, not yours. She will handle it he way, in her time. You must let it go because your the only one hung up on it.

Answer 5

Your not but she sure should. Its not your obligation to tell her husband what she is up to. That is up to her.  

Answer 6

It's not your place to say a word.  What are you, the moral police all of a sudden?  Keep your mouth shut.  She participated in the threesome because she trusted you and your wife.  Don't be a jerk.

Temple of no temple, if she wants to tell her husband it's her business.  What are you going to gain by telling him?  Are you gonna get some form of trophy or medal or model citizen of year award?  NO!  You're not!  

If you're so concerned about blabbing who's been in your bedroom, perhaps you and your wife should keep the bedroom doors closed to outsiders.  Geez!

Answer 7

Why don't you talk to her about it and ask for her input on the matter before you do anything?

Temper your zeal with patience and understanding.  Sometimes you have to keep the past to yourself for your friends.

Answer 8

IF she wants him to know then its her place to tell him not yours.

If she doesn't want to tell him that is her choice and you should respect her decison and not say anything to him.

Answer 9

In my opinion that is between the couple and there is no moral obligation on you to say anything. It is up to her how she wants to define her marriage and if she feels that he needs to know. Furthermore I suspect if you feel that you should tell her husband is due to the fact that you still have some feelings for her and you might be pleasantly surprised in a few years as she may try to contact you for swapping partners. My advice would be let them be a couple and do not involve yourself in their lives for a while.  

Answer 10

You cannot have s*x outside of marriage within 1 year of entering the temple. She shouldnt be sealed yet! Tell her or she may regret it!

Reverse that, you cannot enter the temple within 1 year of having s*x outside of marriage.

Answer 11

was she engaged to him when she did it?

if not, her past is up to her to reveal...

Answer 12

Ya know what I would do, I would tell the bishop, and hope to God, he does something about it, like he acts like he has the gift of discrenment and calls her into hsi office and (or suggest this to the bishop) and says he feels there is something she needs to tell him about some act of sexual immorality and she is not as pure as she would have everyone think she is, and hoepfully she will not play liittle miss princess and tell the truth and they can take it from there.  

Answer 13

Nope.  There's no obligation, in my opinion, for ANYONE to tell him, but more importantly, she is the only one who may decide to tell him about her past adventures.  You have zero standing and there's no reason at all for you to butt in.

Answer 14

You certainly have yourself in quite the situation. Morally you may feel obligated to tell him but what about your obligation to her as a friend? If she wants to keep this part of her life quiet and you spill the beans, you will have betrayed a friend and broken one of the golden rules of swinging (never kiss and tell) but then again, if he finds out he may feel betrayed by you as well.

I suggest that you keep quiet and certainly halt all swinging activities with this female friend. In all honesty, if you knew the two of them were dating and you still continued with your threesome fun, you have already betrayed him and that would possibly be his main concern, not that you didn't tell him about it.

What's done is done and certainly can't be taken back so move forward responsibly keeping what you know to yourself and allow the chips to fall where they may, hopefully it will all end positively for all of you.

The best of luck!

Ginni

Answer 15

If you believe that there is a very good chance of him finding out sooner or later, then you should tell HER that you are going to give her a certain time limit to tell him, or you will do it. It's easier to cancel a wedding than it is to have her go thru an excommunication and all that c**p.

If you think she can get away with it, then don't worry about it. It's on HER head. God is not mocked and He does not like liars.

There's always karma. What goes around comes around.

Answer 16

Oh yes, because they are not supposed to be getting married or even enter the temple if she has done that. To get married or even enter into the temple is a sacred thing, and I know people who has gotten married in the temple even though they weren't supposed to and it makes me sick to my stomach.

Answer 17

You're not obligated to say anything, but I would hope that if this girl is getting married that she would have already told her husband to be. If she hasn't maybe she shouldn't be getting married. And if she is scared to say anything because she is getting married in a mormon church, she should have thought about that before she went and had the threesome in the first place. She should have known eventually she would be getting married! But I think that her husband to be needs to know, I would just hope that you wouldn't be the one to have to tell him.:) Good luck!  

Answer 18

No, I wouldn't say you are obligated.  Now, if the behavior continues OR she proposes that it happens again once she is his wife, then it might be in your moral duty to tell this man.. but since she hasn't yet wed, what she does is her business and her decision to tell him.

Answer 19

Oink, oink.