If I was to marry a saudi, how would i go about that?

Question

If I was to marry a saudi, how would i go about that?

Answer 1

it depends on the religion, not country

Answer 2

Saudi women can only marry Saudi men. Also most Saudi women won't marry non Saudis and they want a LOT of money for a dowry.  Some times the man is forced to buy a maid because the oil boom generation in Saudi Arabia doesn't teach their daughters how to cook, please her husband, be obedient, raise children or look after the home.  The oil boom generation is very spoiled and they aren't used to doing anything for their selves over there.  If a Saudi woman were to marry a non Saudi, her children wouldn't get Saudi citizenship.  The dowry over there is as high as $50,000 USD!

Answer 3

mmm... are u gonna move to saudi arabia?

Answer 4

lol..I  am curious about this one;-p

Answer 5

this is way to huge and complex of a subject to answer in a few lines but i'll try giving you some of the highlights.

as a non saudi, or particularly a non arab...you need to approach this cleverly. fully understanding the culture, customs, and "proposal ettiquette" is vital....ofcourse you have to be muslim (muslim saudi women are prohibited by thier faith not to mention law of marrying a non muslim).

traditionally, one would have his female relatives (granny, mother, aunts, sisters...etc) search for a potential bride...they ofcourse would have a better knowledge of the local female network....so they would launch a search for the best of the best in terms of family, manners, personality, education, beauty...etc (with basic compatibility in mind...such as socio-economic class and so on) then talk to you about the selected few (some manage to get pictures...don't ask, i heard some people did that back in the days) and you settle on one to approach first...ofcourse nowadays you can meet the girl in college, at the beach, at the office...etc and don't have to go through all that (in this case, she'll be a great help when it comes to how to approach her family to propose later on actually).

if the "bride" hasn't been married before (virgin) you'd need the approval and blessings of her male guardian (the father or whom ever takes his legal role after he's passed away), if there are no male relatives, an assigned judge has the authority to complete the marriage acting as her guardian. if the woman is divorced or widowed then she has the legal right to marry her self (but ofcourse if no one wants any problems or tension with his inlaws he'll still go through her family first)..

you need to get some sort of contact info to the womans family, call them up and introduce your self and your purpose clearly asking to meet them...when you get an "appointment" make sure you dress up and look your best, if at all possible it's highly recomended you bring your father along with you (some families would also like to meet the mother, be sure though), bring a gift...no need to tell you how polite and well mannered you should be...if your father is with you he'll probably be the first to talk and state that he would be honored to ask for the daughters hand in marriage for his son (you)....and so on...

you'll talk about your background...where you're from ,where did you grow up, your education, work...what kind of job you're holding at the moment, your salary, do you own or rent an apartment/house, would you move back to your country after marriage or would you settle in saudi..if you're a recently converted muslim you'll probably want to talk about that too... and stuff like that.....if the father has no strong objection to any of this he'll either call his daughter for you to meet and talk with the same day or would tell you to come on set date and hour. when you meet the girl, you wont be completly alone...parents or siblings will be near by..close enough to see you both. it is permitted and encouraged in islam to see the bride and talk to her....you'll probably meet a lot after that (given the girl didn't dismiss you as a potential husband right away) to get to know each other better....you ofcourse should shower her with gifts (gifts to your inlaws wouldn't be such a bad idea either), if there's acceptance from both sides...an official engagement will take place called a "milkah"(which is actually a legal marriage registered by an official "ma'athoun and two witnesses...you pay the dowry) a celebration party takes place, this "milkah" is to allow more privacy and freedom for you and the bride to further your knowledge of each other and allow you to go out together for dinners and walks by the beach and so on and so forth....but some girls will not allow you to proceed to any "bases" until the wedding night (i say some cause by islam and the law you two are married and anything that happens between you two is considered Halal, i.e permitted in islam...but others prefer to wait incase things don't go too well and the relationship breaks before the wedding). when everything is ok a "Ghumrah" is set (which is known as the henna night, a special celebration for the bride where she's adorned with henna ) and a wedding day is set after it, that's the "big" ceremony with the white dress and cake in which the bride at the end of the night moves in with you (well you go on the honeymoon first).

there are many details and ifs and buts and howevers that i really can't get into here....you truley need to have a couple of "sit downs" with a well "experienced" local (cause these stuff differ from family to family and from one saudi city to the other) and have him give you the full extensive course....good luck.

Answer 6

With great care.

You do not say which country you are a national of. For the purposes of my comments I am assuming that you are a US national. If that is wrong then please do not guess, get professional advice form a good lawyer who understands both Saudi law and the law of your country of nationality.

I am not a Saudi, nor an American, but my daughter did marry a Saudi, in Europe where they met, and with my blessing. I gave that knowing that my daughter is not stupid, and after she had answered some legal questions about her inheritance with  lawyer I know in London..

My comments follow, again, please do not regard them as any more than a guide.Go ask a lawyer who will put his/her answers on paper a company or partnership which has good legal libility insurance if things go wrong (you can sue your lawyer).

1) Proceed with great care. You may be very much in love with your proposed husband. He may be very much in love with you. Problem risked here is you both dive in and haven't checked the legal situation carefully.

Under US law and the law of most free, democratic countires, anyone can marry anyone provided they are of the right age and can prove theri identity and eligibility (ranges from 12 in some countries to 18 or 21 in others). You must comply the laws of the country and state you intend to marry in.

So, whilst Canadians can marry at 14, if they marry in NY state, then they must be 18.

Problem is that in other countries, including Saudi Arabia, that marriage may not be recognised by local law. If it is allowed, then that may have to be approved by a religous officer. In some countries, for example Vietnam, the decision is down to the local town council as to whether the marriage (already done and approved in another country) is acceptable under local law.  

If  not, the marriage is nul and void in that country, it nver existed. That problem has hit some Viet veterans, for example who wished to return, with their wives and children to the country which is their new home, but found that the marriage was not acceptable locally. They had to book seperate hotel rooms, and eventually leave. They could live anywhere in the world as man and wife, and family, but not in Vietnam!

Second problem is that the laws on inheritance may differ in the country you were born in, the country you married in, and the country you are a resident of. For example, if you are of Indian nationality, marry a Saudi, and live in Australia, if your father and mother leave you their entire estate (maybe a house, or even just some family jewels.. a few rings. a couple of paris of earrings, then you may find that your husband owns them, not you,  

You might accept that. But what if your father has a 3 million US$ life insurance he toook out when he was young? Would you give that to your husband knowing he could divorce you in the next 5 minutes? Perhaps, but check beforehand.

Thirdly, work out where you are going to live and what are your rights in that country. An American woman subject to Afghan law would not be a pretty sight. In some countries you might be obliged to cover anything but your nose and eyes once you leave the house, or even forbidden to leave the house. In extreme cases you may be forbidden to take education. Do NOT accept under any circumstances an assurance from your future husband. People change their lives and opinions. People fall in love, and sometimes fall out of love.

It may be the custom for your children to be taken and raised by your mother-in-law. You might not be allowed to see them often except as a guest of your mother-in law (not Sauidi Arabia as far as I know, but I am not an expert in their law. You need someone who IS an expert in three laws. Those of the country you were born in (Your nationality normally), the nationality of your future spouse, and the country you intend to live in. If there are several countries that you might live in then you need a lawyer who can look at all of them.

Lawyers like that are VERY expensive, and rare. Knowing one nations laws is a lifetime job.Knowing two or three nations is possible for a gifted lawyer. Knowing ALL is impossible. So you need a specialist. You may have to hunt high and low, and it will be expensive.

If you voice your concerns to your boyfriend and he says "don't worry, it is easy", then be worried,; in the limit do not marry, stay as a girlfriend. But if he turns round and says "I understand, please find the lawyers you need, I will of course pay.

The one to worry about is "I have a very good lawyer in London who will answer all your questions". Fine, but then get him to agree to finance your own lawyer in London (that you choose, and instruct that lawyer to be very careful, that you fear problems of cross-national law conflict.

Write that lawyer a letter signed in blue ink. Keep copies in your bank and/or with your US lawyer. Plus a copy with a  friend that no-one knows about. Request that he replies.to confirm .If he doesn't, then dump him and do not pay any fees.

My personal experience is that you can easily negotiate a settlement with a Saudi husband from a good family. They will expect you to bargain (preferably your parents, but you will do in the limit as you are a foreigner).

An agreement can be easily made that gurarantees on inheritances respected in the USA will be respected regardless of country of residence.

An agreement can be made about the style of dress that is acceptable (Cite US fashion magazines) in private. Public dress is non-negotiable for Saudis living with European or USA wives in Saudi Arabia. Find out what it is, try it, and accept to live with it if you might end up living in Saudi Arabia.

An agreement can be made to accept ANY form of education that is done in private. In that case you need a blanket authoristaion to use an un-censored internet which will be difficult or impossible to obtain in some countries, like Saudi  Arabia.

The solution is to negotiate an educational allowance deposited with an escrow agent (Chosen by you)  in the US, and the right to use that by a stay of "UP-TO" x months per year of marriage.

Sorry if I make it sound complicated, but it IS complicated. By culture Saudie's will assume that their future wife will accept all the rules they have known since they were children. The thought that a woman might want something different is almost impossible. It doesn't mean he doesn't love you, it is just that you are breaking every rule he has ever lived by. Your marriage may be stopped. By him or by his parents.

If you finally DO negotiate a way to live in the future, make sure that it holdf if he dies. I.E It must be binding on ALL others regarless of where they live or their natioanlity.

So, have your stepped into a hornets nest. Yes, or maybe no.

I wish you well and many children.

Imagine a conversation between two Saudi's.

Respect the culture.

One says "Your (European/American) wife, she is so beautiful. How the h**l did you manage a superb wife like this?"

"I lied through my teeth whilst making love"

"You sly one you!" "It is a bad thing that you did, but she is worth it, she is resplendent"

"I know"

Know that in many cultures world-wide, lying well is a skill that is highly valued. It is forbidden by relligous law, but practised widely.

Back to reality. Educated people from almost every country in the modern world will repspect you and you will have no problems at all and probably a very happy marriage.

Reality? If it goes wrong you might be in deep ****. Over many years you may have renounced your American passport to gain a local passport, perhaps for tax reasons.

Think carefully. It is a lot safer to marry a USA guy. Even with a European you are probably safe, as women are strong in Europe, it is one of threir bastions of coming out of the middle-ages, when women were to be bought and sold freely, that European women would rally around and protect you, pay huge legal fees to defend your rights as a woman.

That kind of protection does not exist outside of the USA and Western Europe. It will, I hope, one day.

Those warnings given, I wish you well.

But please do not take such things lightly. If you are a US citizen and intend to marry and live in the USA with your Saudi fiancee, then you will be OK and no special formalities are neccessary beyond a birth certificate, perhaps a passport, and perhaps a notarised certificate of being free to marry from your future spouses country. Sometimes a certificate showing that your spouse has no criminal record may be required.

You can then marry as easily as any citizen of the US. Except there may be a surcharge for the paperwork.

There are ways round the finncial things, but they are gtting hard to find and sometimes expensive.

I hope you have a happy and long life. My daughter and her husband just passed their 10th anniverserary and are still very much in love. But they are still in Europe. My daughter has told me that if he returns to Saudi, she will refuse and come back to stay with us, her family. We agreeed for her sake.

Answer 7

Save yourself a life of misery and don't do it!

Answer 8

With an abundance of caution and only after spending at least a year studying their culture in depth and visiting Saudi Arabia to learn about what is important to them.

Answer 9

Are you a man? and if you are why don't you go marry someone from San Fransisco, Los Angles, or Paris.

Answer 10

Well for starters,

you must be very racist towards non-Arabs.

Be fat, eat a lot...around 1 whole roasted chicken (or half baby lamb) per meal with lots and lots of rice. For snacking, minimum 3 shawarmas at a time are a MUST.

Drive a huge car recklessly. Yell at others a lot..pronounce 'P' as a 'B'

For example ... PEPSI becomes BEBSI

Think that deserts are the best thing since slice bread. Have couple of poor East Asian housemaids who you MUST treat poorly.

Answer 11

Read this article for an idea of the process >> http://www.arabnews.com/?page=7&section=...

Answer 12

I would probably start by meeting the person, dating, and deciding if we were compatible.  THEN check with the legal authorities.

Answer 13

go to your local county courthouse and get a marriage license

Answer 14

hey one for the team...

are you falling in love with SaudiArabia slowly?

also are you back here yet or are you still in the states?

also as youve read most our posts over the year,, you might be aware that Saudi Women rarely, EXTREME rarely marry anyone outside SaudiArabia.. and NO one that is not a muslim... Their fathers just wont turn loose of them..

unless you marry a more moderate westernized Saudi girl that has lived in the west, and probably will stay in the west with no intention of ever returning back to Saudi...

if you are not muslim.. then no chance..

but having said all this..

my neighbor friend.. a saudi girl here, married a US soldier that was here during the 1990 tour of the gulf war... He did however convert to Islam.. They dont live here, they live in USA and she just comes every so often to visit her friend and relatives

* Soul, I like your answers *