If a father wants nothing to do with his child and my sister signed her rights away, do we need documetation?

Question

My sister signed over her rights to her unborn child to me b/c she already had two children and couldn't afford nor did she want a third. I stepped up to the plate and agreed to adopt the child and raise her as my own. The father of the child wanted nothing to do with her. I have had the child since birth and she is now 7mo. I am now down to the last days until we go to court and I just want to make sure that I do not need anything further to document that the father is nowhere to be found, he is in the active military and hasn't contacted me about the child since birth and expressed the child should have been aborted therefore he wants nothing to do with her. Does anyone know of what other steps if any that I would have to take with this situation? I am doing a relative adoption which is uncomplicated but I just want to make sure I don't run into anything crazy. Thanks for all of your help and suggestions.

Answer 1

I would think that if your sister knows who the father is they are going to want him to sign saying he is giving up his rights. I would to if I was you look at all the cases where the guy didn't know the girl was having a baby and she gave it up. Then they come back a year or so later and decide they want it and they have a fight. I would hope he wouldnt do this but you never know I would want to be protected all the way around.

Answer 2

I remember a case of a father who hadn't relinquished his rights and came back to get his son from the adopting family later.  It took years in court, but he won.  Unfortunately, the child was four years old by that time and was torn screaming and crying from the adopting parents arms.  

Get the father's permission.  If he's on active duty in the military, he can be found...the military certainly knows where he is.  He needs to be served with papers stating your intent to adopt his child.  

Laws are so different everywhere, and, depending on where you are, you may not be required to get him to sign over his rights, but that is rarely the case, and morally it's so wrong to not get the father's approval.  Also, you'd hate to have him come back later and say he didn't sign away his rights and try to take the baby back.  Get it in writing, it's better for everyone.

Answer 3

hmmm, what is the court for?  getting you legal custody or the adoption? The first thing that happens is you get custody, then there is a court hearing on parental rights termination and if the father can't be found then an ad must be placed in the paper trying to find him. Then there is a waiting period and you must also be approved to adopt (background checks, homestudy, references, etc)  It takes much more than a mom signing a piece of paper in front of you.

Answer 4

It sounds like what you've done is correct BUT i think that perhaps you should've got the father to sign away his rights as a verbal agreement cannot be held up in court at a later date.

Answer 5

I agree with what other people said I just wanted to tell you that I think what you are doing is great and everyone else who adopted I want to adopt when I get older and I think you are just a really good person.

Answer 6

You still need to get his permission or to get a court to say his rights are terminated.  The simplest thing would be for him to sign relinquishment papers.

Answer 7

He has to terminate his rights before the child can be adopted. I adopted my niece. My sister signed her rights away and even though the father was unknown, we had to terminate his rights(check father registry, ad in newspaper). Since the father is known, have your attorney contact him and terminate his rights. The last thing you want is to have this man show up trying to claim this child.

Answer 8

If the father didn't sign anything, he could come back later, even years later, and try to get the child.  If it is possible, have the mother say she doesn't know who the father is and there will be no problems there.

Answer 9

You should file a request to terminate his parental rights.  I am not too sure about other states, but here they send the documentation to his last known address and advertise that he/she is being sued to terminate in the local paper.  There is a waiting period and after that point a judge considers it noncontested and terms their rights.  At that point you can not sue them for child support or anything as they are no longer considered the childs parent.    Talk to a lawyer or paralegal or even the family court in your area, they can give you the legal specifics.  Good luck.

Answer 10

yep...give it to a good family, that will love it! There are so many couples out there today, that have so much going for them and just want to have a "family" such asa little one to raise. Please help these families out. Obviously your sister doesn't feel fit to be a parent right now and thats okay. But there was a reason for this child and someone out there will be the best mommy for it:-D

good luck

my thoughts are with ya

hope you make the best decision you can

Answer 11

You have to show proof of searching for the father. He is active military so he CAN be found if you take the right paths so that might work to your disadvantage. It doesnt matter if he said abort the baby before hand or not. First off you will need proof of that cause they will usually not take your word for it and if he ever finds out then he could cotest the adoption. Your best bet would have been to contact the father through the military and obtain a consent for the adoption of the child.

Answer 12

I was a foster parent and one of the children living with us had never met his father but when it was time to adopt, the state had to put ads in the local papers and try to find him.  He had so many days to respond and if he did not, then the child was free to adopt.  I am not sure if this has to be done with family adoptions but I would assume that the rules are still the same and the judge will need some form of proof that the father wants to sign over custody or just abandon his child.