If crossdressers were better at what they did would you be more tolerant of them?

Question

allot of crossdressers in public are obviously men, but if they were better at what they did would you be more tolerant of them, even go out with one?

All of these 'girls' are men that haven't had surgery to alter their aperance:

http://img47.imageshack.us/my.php?image=webblacknpink2bj9.jpg

http://img229.imageshack.us/my.php?image=livvi1ne8.jpg

http://img229.imageshack.us/my.php?image=jojobest1tg8.jpg

http://img183.imageshack.us/my.php?image=alicia20net2026ed7.jpg

http://img183.imageshack.us/my.php?image=pc010069wi5.jpg

This is a question to everyone, men, women, transgendered...

Answer 1

Okay I agree that SOME of them do look like a dog's dinner but then again the other half could even put you to shame! I've seen them and been convinced myself they were real women

Answer 2

Now those girls right there are top leauge, Young, dedicated and made up for photoshoots by professional makeup artists. If you saw them in the street you wouldnt give them a second look other than when youre think 'Yeah baby.. Hmmmm'.  you can't really try to compare them with the likes of me. I'm in my late 30's, built like a shed and have a face that used to shunt railway locomotives in the snow at midnight for a living.

So.... Yeah, if we all looked like those girls, everyone would accept us, but we don't, so people don't accept us so readily. I personally keep myself to myself, and if I go out it's not to public places and not in an attempt to pass as female. In a perfect world I could walk down the street dressed in whatever I ilke, but I accept with my crossdressing, that I do not live there, so I make allowances for other peoples feelings, and keep it as private as possible.  It's a shame that some girls do not, but maybe thay have stronger beliefs.about personal freedom than I do.

That's my thoughts on it all.

Answer 3

The thing is this...

They dress that way because that's how they want to look and how they feel they look good and it's completely there choice but no where does it state in any rule book that they MUST dress and look a certain way or it just doesn't count. If it makes them feel better then fine but I bet some people would say about you 'Oh why do they where that top it looks stupid' I bet they don't wonder then oh I could date him because he has no dress sense.

If there happy the world is one person happier.

Answer 4

If a guy manages to pull off looking like a girl and has a straight guy thinking that but finding out after wards that they're not, you can tell that there is going to be some tension.

These guys fro example that are wearing skinny jeans and some of them kissing guys, I support them because their managing to at the same time their helping to get people to be more tolerant, they're not afraid to just go out their and kiss a guy pretty much.  

Answer 5

Cross-dressers are very often straight and simply want to feel comfortable with their feminine side. All babies start off feminine,only after six weeks or so does the s*x factor determine whether the foetus remains female or goes on to become male. What makes you think cross-dressers want to be confused as women love?

Answer 6

I would not want people to tolerate me, just a little understanding that this is how I feel best, Yes I am a man who cross-dresses and I do go out in public, some people are very understanding while others are negative, and I understand their feelings, all I ask is they do try to understand mine.

This is me, this is how I feel best and yes I am not a convincing woman, I am just me

Answer 7

Personally, I don't understand at all why many people are intolerant of men who like to wear clothing that is designed for women. No one looks twice these days at women who are wearing a trouser suit, after all.

Answer 8

No

They should all be castrated.

Answer 9

It's not necessarily better at what they do, just doing it more appropriately for the set of circumstances facing a cross dresser may collect less inappropriate comments.  People can't help the shape of their features, size of hands etc but just have to deal with what they have & sometimes, no matter how hard people try there's just no disguising things.

Also using the word tolerated implies there'd still be a h**l of a lot of negativity surrounding a cross dresser instead of being accepted as an individual member of society.  Some cross dressers (note not all) almost seem to shout 'look at me, I'm a cross dresser' just like overtly camp homosexuals seem to shout 'look at me, I'm g*y', personally I feel they deserve a lot of the stick they get as hetrosexual's are rarely seen to shout 'look at me, I'm straight' , they just get on with life.  I feel if crossdressers, homosexuals, phycically challanged etc people took the line of trying to blend in & get on with life, almost ignoring the fact they don't fit into a 'standard' mold instead of 'making a point of this as it's my right to', they might well get on a lot better.

Following on from what I said in response to your last question, some cross dressers don't seem to realise that being dressed as those in pics 2 & 5 is acceptable. My dearly beloved was up front & honest with me when I met him & I thought I could cope with it all as I didn't realise just what it involved or meant to him.  I'll admit that we've had arguments in the past over it & even now sometimes I feel very insecure with it as well as frustrated.  For him it's not just about putting a skirt & stockings on, it run's a lot deeper

BUT I also now realise that instead of letting him get on with things as I don't want to hurt/offend him, I need to tell him these things & point him in the right direction, all be it gently.  Shall we say that he realises that generally women don't wear the sort of thing that's in pic 1 to do the shopping, gardening or housework - unless it's a very special occasion!

I gather his ex was far from supportive in this area of his life I & suppose I almost see it as my duty to be honest & upfront with him in this area in the hope that it'll help & support him.  If I say something to him, it usually gives him food for thought & then when he's done some thinking about it we'll have a natter.

Last weekend he went out dressed for the first time in 24 years, as he said - there's no denying he's a cross dresser, that's what he is, BUT people would have to take a second look at him where as if he'd gone out the way he was dressing & made up when I met him, there would have been no doubt that there would have been calls of 'freak' & a lot worse following him.  

As he says there's a time & a place for certain clothes & you need to recognise when it is & I really do hope that I've helped him with this as having people be verbally abusive to me about my size all my life I'd hate for him to have to go through that because for (to me) obvious reasons he's not as confident (yet) when dressed & to have his feelings hurt on something that is so much a part of him & so important to him by small minded, ignorant idiots, to me isn't worth thinking about.

Answer 10

Personally, I like the diversity of crossdressers and think people should look however they want, but probably the general public would be more tolerant if they looked more convincing.  If someone feels uncomfortable in their appearance, then it is more noticable.

Answer 11

These are men? I think not....

Answer 12

Those are all men?  They look more like women than I do.  

I've seen cross dressers who do look still like men, even when they've tried so hard to look like a woman, but those fellas in the photos look amazing.  With legs to die for too, if I may say so.  

Answer 13

There are many among us that for their on reasons proclaim that they should be allowed to look and act in any manner that is of their own desire. Self expression and social acceptance have always been at odds, and seldom see a compromise. I'm on the compromise side of things, because I believe that people who are uncomfortable with a form regardless of the form will shy away from, have an animosity towards or be in fear of, that which is different, unusual, different, or threatinging.

So to your question, there is no doubt in my mind and with my experiences as proof, that people are much more comfortable with a transgendered person if this person meets their expectations of a woman or a man. I have also had many conversations with many run of the mill type people that at first thought that I was female and once knowing me for a short time realized that I was not female, but knew that I did not have a male persona or live in the "acting of a male perspective of a female", so they very easily accepted me as one of the girls. Perhaps not female, but close enough that they were not threatened or concerned that I would put them in an uncomfortable position.

Sadly, it is the the common man or woman who has an expectation. And they are in the majority. When any of us go out side that expectation, there is a riple. If we move closer to a more societal generality, society will open up for us. I beleive this is natural growth and learning. I believe this has been done with many different aspects of life when cultures clash or come together. This happening all the time in an incremental way and has be done, perhaps not fully but a lot in the g*y community.

I think the general public is willing to do this in the gender community as well, What most want from of is that we are healthy productive people and can contribute to society in a positive manner. Some of the "muggles" may not understand, and they may react, by they are doing so only from thier ignorance. Let's educate them in a light that is pleasing to everyone.

When in Rome!

No Aurelius, That is not correct. Your perception of the word cross dresser is that of a person who only takes joy in wearing womens clothing for what ever reason, which further casts the stereotype into stone with the muggles, as you continue to discribe it to those unfamilar. Our community has debated the terms of gender expression adnausium. The general public uses the word to encompass anyone that is in some way gender conflicted. Let's not continue creating the stereotype, nor paint your crossdresser as less then a person that transitions completely.

I understand that there are people who only do this for pleasure purposes, and perhaps some of them shouldn't be out and about in their revilry, but please. don't cat a negitive on the word.

Answer 14

Hi... First off, all of those "gurls" within the pics are very good looking and well dressed..

True, we as c/d s - t/v s are not all as good looking as the world would like, but then again, there are some g/g s out there that aren't exactly raving beauties either..

The world will never be totally accepting of crossdressers no matter how well they look once it has been made known what they actually are..

It all has a lot to do with how comfortable you are within yourself, and whether your main objective is to "pass"or not.

Being accepted is the main aspect of crossdressing, and if you can "get by" as well, so much the better.

Wardrobe / apparel is one facet that many don't pay enough attention to, and this can be a "dead giveaway" right off the top.

Make up is another area and skin preparation is a thing that some don't spend ample time on. Far too many "gurls" dress well, but destroy the whole "illusion" by having their beard show through their make up..

I myself, totally enjoy doing make up and creating  new facial appearances but a good concealer is a prerequisite

Rachelle In High Heels

Answer 15

Cross-dressers are, as the name suggests, people who like dressing up in clothes designed for the other gender.

It has not necessarily got anything to do with looking like the opposite s*x or wishing to do so.

You may be confusing cross-dressers with transsexuals.

Answer 16

Its not my place to be tolerant of anyone everyone is human

Answer 17

Many women go out wearing mens clothes, would you not wish to be seen with them cos they dont look like men?

Answer 18

Some of them look OK- the second one especially. I personally wouldn't go out with them - i'm a girl. But it all depends on the individual, their personality and whether it is a big issue or not. And also on the person going out with them too