If men could have babies as well, would women relegate that responsibility to men too?

Question

I often call women selfish, because in society men do far more for women, than women do for men. Men have to pay for everything, have to be the ones to risk rejection by asking out, have to buy drinks; women get ladies night for free entrance and drinks at clubs, women just have everything catered to them. Women want equal or more pay than men, but still want men to pay for most things.

Women's counter-argument is usually "yeah but we have babies; that's a big responsibility."

But, women have babies because they HAVE to have babies. A man can't, even if he wanted to. When a man and a woman decide to have a child -- guess who HAS to be the one to deliver the baby? Yes -- women. Women don't give birth out of the goodness of their heart. Women give birth because that's the only biologically possible way to give birth.

So you can't compare it to men having to do everything. A woman is equally capable to treat her man to dinner, ask a guy out on a date, buy him a drink, etc.

Answer 1

I don't agree with you that women are always the selfish ones, but I don't think having babies and free drinks are comparable topics.  If women are giving you that, they're idiots.

Answer 2

http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/23942218/

Ask him

Answer 3

And I'm the woman who never lets her man treat her to dinner or buy her drinks, who pays the cover charge when she doesn't have to, and who asks out and makes the first call on a regular basis. If we were to have our own child, would I want to be the one to get pregnant? h**l, no!

Answer 4

the technology will probably be available in another 15-30 years..

      Anyways it is all about conditioning, if a bar you go to has a ladies night either A don't go or B sue(technically ladies night may violate many many state law's and it would be an easy win).

And when you go to bar's don't go there looking, go there with friends and have a great time(ehh + not smart to look for a gf or anything like that at a bar..).



        And lastly but perhaps most importantly if you have a gf, or just chick friend or a women your trying to get with but they seem "helpless" or "selfish" do yourself a favor and tell them to bug off(people like that I have 0% tolerance for, makes life much more enjoyable)

       There are some "usefull" women out there, maybe not many but a good enough amount (in all fairness I think the vast majority of our species are brain dead waste of space but thats besides the point).

You could say society's expectations but before society can be changed you have to change your expectations.

    If your tired of selfish women then stay clear of them. If enough guy's did it basic capitalism comes into play and they would reform themselves.

Answer 5

You're right, if they want kids they have to bear them themselves.

My mum makes a similarly trite comment "I carried you for 9 months"

Oh there's a surprise, I wonder how many other children got carried for 9 months? Just 99% of them you say? Well aren't you special =D lol

Answer 6

I'm sorry that you feel that way but you have to understand that your thinking is just prejudice, sterotypcal ignorance, negative association.

Because you view women in such a negative way, decent ones wont be interested in you.

Answer 7

If men could have babies then women would be just as 'useless' as they were looked at upon a long time ago.

Gotta keep them equal.

Answer 8

Good grief, who have you been dating?  All the women I know ask men out, buy drinks, and treat their partners to dinner.  Maybe you need to meet different women!  Or maybe you lack experience of dating and have out-of-date assumptions about what it involves.

As for men having babies, I imagine that couples would work it out between them, as most couples try to do with other life decisions.

Answer 9

i believe you are telling the truth, being male is now hard, and being feminie is just happy go lucky

Answer 10

I hope you don't associate all women with this. I was 24 before I had anyone even buy me a drink, because I didn't want a drink bought because they wanted, you know...

I rarely go out at all anymore, because that scene is getting pathetic for a gal my age (36).

The main reason why I don't want everything catered to me is because you don't appreciate it. I want people to do things for me because they want to get to know me, not because they want to score. I've bought men drinks before, but you know for the most part from my experience - they don't LIKE women to do that.

I don't know about if men could have babies. I think they would be more understanding about what a woman goes through when she carries and delivers. Or even gets pregnant by mistake (condom broke, etc.).

I wish we could all be a little more empathetic to other people's needs in general, and if they want something done for them it should be brought forth instead of grumbling and being sarcastic in passive-aggressive ways.

I don't know what you want if you don't tell me. :)

Answer 11

Women do give birth out of the goodness of their hearts...ever hear of surrogacy...?

Answer 12

So, what you're saying is, the ONLY thing that women EVER do, is lie on their backs and push out kids. That's it. Otherwise, we are pathetic slugs who never, oh I don't know...do MOST of the childcare after we've pushed the kid out, we never cook dinner, wash YOUR clothes (assuming you ever find someone to cohabitate with you), fold them, do MOST of the household chores, GO TO WORK and earn money which ALSO goes toward the bills, house payment, etc.

So women have kids (only because we "have to") and MEN look after the kids thereafter. They feed them (because us selfish women would never sacrifice our perfect b*****s to nourish BABIES! Eck!), bathe them, get up in the middle of the night, change all the diapers, soothe all of the tears, teach them their first words, patch all of the boo-boos, make all of the money, cook all of the meals, arrange all of the play-dates, get the children TO all of the play-dates, and to school, and then, eventually sees them off to college. And for 18 years, we women have been lying on the couch, eating bon-bons, and watching Oprah.

And on top of all of that, you guys have to BUY DRINKS, TOO!? How DO you manage?

Well, I say forget those lazy women! Become celibate! It's totally not worth it!

BTW, if you don't like "having" to buy girls drinks, then DON'T. I've NEVER, ever let a guy buy me a drink. It's always seemed somehow cheesy, and sleazy. As if they thought I then "owed" them something. I've always said "No, thanks" and talked to him anyway, if he seemed nice. And guess what? I still dated those guys I DIDN'T let buy me drinks. That whole "Can I buy you a drink" thing is very 1970's. Most guys don't even do it, anymore. Also, many women DO treat, now-a-days. Seriously, when WAS the last time you dated? 1963?

Answer 13

I think a better question is how women will deal with the consequences of that possibility?  (i.e. accidental pregnancy, abortion, and maternity fraud) Would they expect to have control over a man’s body if he was pregnant with her child?

Answer 14

Some women want men to be totally responsible for everything and remain unwilling to even do for themselves. Not all, by any means but much of a similar notion has even been written to law and established by court decisions (for instance when a pregnancy occurs, the man's responsibility, for all intents and purposes, is whatever the mother decides)

Lauren, there is a little problem asking "him" for "he" is, in fact, a she. Do you deem it a "miracle" like Orca does, that a woman becomes pregnant? A "miracle" by definition is an event inexplicable by the laws of nature. That a woman becomes pregnant does not fit this definition by any stretch of the imagination. She may even be legally defined as a "man" but biologically and actually, she is and will always be, female.

Answer 15

I'm sorry you've only ever had dealings with spoiled princesses.  Do you perhaps thing you're choosing the wrong women rather than saying all women are selfish?  I certainly am not one of those women.  Whenever I go out on a date, I expect to pay my share, if not pick up the entire bill.  If my date insists on picking up the entire bill, that's his choice.  But there are times when I will make my date let me pay my share or treat.  I've gotten arguments on this.  I'll even hold the door for men.  I risk rejection as well.  And honestly, if it were possible for men to bear children, I would still expect to if I was in a committed relationship with a man who wanted to be a father.  That is, unless he insisted that he be the one to carry our child.  I do not believe this world should be one-sided in favor of women.  We should do for each other out of the kindness of our hearts, not because it's expected.

Answer 16

The examples of men "doing everything" that you gave are about little else but the dating ritual (with heavy emphasis on drinks).

These days women do ask guys out, but then there are people who think it's kind of nice for the guy to see someone he likes, ask her out (yes, risk rejection), and then go on a nice date.  (Then again, lots of women are willing to pay if they've been dating someone long enough not to have to worry about insulting his male ego by offering to pay.)_

Beyond dating, however, women are often the ones who do everything.  Go to a few women's forums online and see how many complain about "couch potato" husbands.   Women don't just have the babies, they most often also take care of them (or if they work too, they're the ones to deal with the day care arrangement).  They usually are the ones who take care of the house.  Often they take care of the yard and cars too.  Many take care of all the finances.  Children's medical and education needs are usually managed by women.

Women are often the ones to buy the gifts for their husbands' relatives when occasions arise.  They're the ones who plan and carry out all the holidays, birthday parties, and other social activities for the family.

They're often the ones to call in the plumber or the septic tank guy.  They're usually the ones to act as chauffer to the children, deal with Little League coaches, make costumes for the skating show, get girls to dancing school, and do any number of other things - and then, women often find time to also do work in the community or help relatives (including husband's family).

So, if when people are still single and dating, the general scenario (which goes along with the courtship practices of many species) is that the guy is supposed to see someone he's interested in, go ask her out, and then cover the cost of a few drinks (or else graciously accept the idea that, for some reason, there's such a thing as "ladies' nights") - I don't think that means guys "have to do everything".

And as far as women having the babies goes:  While guys risk a little rejection if someone declines a date, women risk their lives when they have those babies.  They're also the ones to deal with losing a baby if that happens.   They're usually the ones who have to figure out how to nurture their babies in a way that will make that baby's brain synapses form correctly in the first three years of life (if he isn't too has an inappropriate stress response or flawed immune system for the rest of his life - not to mention if he's to be a secure, well adjusted, individual).