If powerful, controlling women are so bad...?

Question

Why is the d********x so routinely touted as a s*x symbol?

Most men wouldn't say no to Dita Von Tees, and Miss Whiplash, a notorious British brothel owner was treated with good humour by the press during her trial for her offences.

Venus Of The Furs is a literary classic, whereas the Marquis de Sade was a social outcast.

So what is it about powerful controlling women who expect absolute obedience, that makes them so tolerated / approved of by many men? :-)

Answer 1

I get what your saying but you must realize that basically its all just masochism,sexual need what one wants in the bedroom has nothin to do with how they are in ordinary like,I see what your saying about Venus of the and Marquis de Sade's writings but you have to realize they are literature written by men probably for men,The way i see it is that Leopold von Sacher-Masoch is just a far better writer than Marquis de Sade,De Sade was always just far too dark and s*x crazed

Answer 2

It is something majestic to a man because they realize in real life that it wouldn't be like that! A man only fanatasizes about a women controlling him sexually anyways! They know they can dominate the rest.

Answer 3

How many men are we talking? 1 out of 999999999999?

  Just kidding...I love you eleanor I wanna be your toilet paper.

Just kidding again.

  

Well I think it's because those men want to have some sexual fun really.  When I was wrestling with a friend who was a girl (a long time ago), she was beating me up on the trampoline! But I have to admit, I was hot as h**l because of the positions that she took, so I didn't mind losing.

Answer 4

Men date the b*****s and marry the cupcakes.

It's old news...

Answer 5

While sitting in the doctor's office I read an article about power and s*x. I forgot who did the study but they found the more powerful a man was in his business and personal life, the less powerful he wanted to be in his sexual life.

Basically it said men who lead these dominating lifestyles crave time where they can actually submit and not have to make all the decisions or do all the work. Someone else takes control for a little while so it makes for a nice vacation from the normal, everyday life these men go through. It's an easy way to submit without feeling like less of a man because everything goes in the bedroom(for most people at least).

I thought it was an interesting article and explains well while women who live the d********x lifestyle are so sought after.

Answer 6

In any sexual encounter, pleasing your partner is a major part of the experience.  Surrendering to someone else's wishes and commands heightens the subordinate's sense of accomplishment where this is concerned.

Also, there are a great many sexual taboos that people do not allow themselves to explore.  Being "forced" into doing them allows us those experiences without the moral guilt.  

Dominating women are perceived as exceptions to the stereotypical female role.  Whereas men are commonly thought of as the dominant.  And it is believed that most men could overpower the woman if the need arose, whereas the same is not believed to be the case when men dominate women.

In any Dom/Sub relationship I've seen, the reality is that the dominant person has a huge responsibility.  They must execute extreme care to excite their sub, without jeopardizing their safety.  And usually, the dynamic between the parties is not as brutal as the play suggests.  Also, the real "bonding" part of the relationship can come from the aftercare.  

Answer 7

I think that masochists are the only people that make d********x into s*x symbols.

Answer 8

I don't know but I freaking love them! The ones that are that way don't do it in a nagging way, or a bitchy way. I wouldn't like whipped or any of that s and m stuff. But for sure that type of woman pretty much get's what she wants to in life.

Answer 9

They appeal to a niche, fetish market. Dita Von Tease has a cult following, especially in the g*y and L*****n community, she's kitsch, little more than novelty. Most men would be put off by controlling women as most women are put off by controlling men..

Answer 10

Im a lady, and of course I would get it on with the man version of dita but im not going to introduce him to my mom!!!  

Answer 11

The powerful, controlling women only seem bad unless the d********x is Angelina. Right guys?

Answer 12

If a man had to have s*x with a Dita every night it would start to be irritating. That's why it's fun now and again, it's an aberration from the norm.

A man hopes that even a d********x will fall into his arms at some point.

Answer 13

Some really good answers already, but I'd note that a semi-naked woman who is powerful and controlling in a private and personal situation is considerably more acceptable to many men than a woman dressed in a business suit who is powerful and controlling in the office...

Answer 14

It's been in my experience that some men enjoy doing things for girls they really like.

They like seeing her pleased and happy with them. They like being admired for the things that they are willing to do.

It seems like you have to be either one of two things or both for men do want to do this for you and that's either being sexually attractive or making a man happy emotionally.

Usually when a man is completely in love with you and you still won't sleep with him you're a d********x hah. The guy basically wants to worship you and craves any kind of physical intimacy even if it is just sniffing the pillow you were leaning against while you were watching TV

I think a lot men who want to be with dominatrices are men who had cruel or overbearing mothers and this is just a exaggerated form of pleasing the original mother with a sexualized twist. A lot of dominatrices get requests for 'forced feminization'

Answer 15

You see, a lot of men don't want to be controlled by women in their everyday life, but sexually speaking they'd love it, well most men anyway!

Answer 16

Seriously?  s*x and fun are different than real life.

Answer 17

What is wrong with powerful women, as long as they are pretty and are ready for s*x... I would love it

Answer 18

I'm not sure by what standard you have seen Venus In Furs judged a "literary classic." It is very well written and an interesting example of sexual perversity expressing itself through 19th century Romantic literary conventions. But I think the reason it has been considered so much less repulsive than the works of de Sade has more to do with the fact that it is far less violent and over-the-top and does not include any scenes that would be considered non-consensual. It's about a romantic young man with a very artistic sensibility voluntarily enslaving himself to a cruel, capricious "Goddess" as a testament to her tremendous physical beauty and of his overwhelming love and desire for her--kind of an ultimate overdose on passionate intensity in the temple of pure beauty. De Sade's subject, on the other hand, is more about the unrestrained Will to Power unleashing misery and suffering upon innocents. De Sade gets a bad rap, to some degree, at least. He's not the poet that Von Masoch is, but he is the serious philosopher of the two. He is writing at the time of the French Revolution and his gruesome tales could easily enough be seen as an explanation of the dark heart of humanity revealing itself in the emerging world of empire and global capitalism. Consider the image of the Smirking Chimp GWB and transpose it in your mind beside the image of a screaming Iraqi toddler with its legs blown off, or some old person in New England freezing to death in New England this coming winter.

A better comparison to Venus in Furs would be The Story of O. That book is much more popular, sells many more copies. Still, I will agree that the image of the d********x has a much better public image than the image of a sexually dominated woman does. That's because it is more fun--it is more obviously a game. If you see a woman getting slapped around by some rough looking guy, your first reaction is to think he's assaulting her against her will--there's a good chance he could be. But if you see some little Jessica Alba-like cutie in a leather mini-skirt slapping around some guy, you know d**n well that he is enjoying it very much. It is an incongruous image and obviously a s*x game, and even people not really turned on by the fetish itself will naturally feel a little flutter of titillation.

And it's not true that "many men" approve or desire "powerful, controlling women who expect absolute obedience." Even the dude in Venus in Furs realizes that's actually not such a great trip in real life. What "many men" think would be hot is to have a really s**y, good looking woman smack them around a little bit and maybe give them a few orders to do things that they would already like to do.    

Answer 19

Frankly, though I admire powerful women who can exercise authority with strength and wisdom, I'm too dominant to be  terribly enthused about being controlled by them, or anyone else for that matter. I  put up with *other* peoples' authority while on the job because it keeps the paychecks coming.

When quitting time comes, I prefer to be the one holding the whip. Anything less would feel like the office all over again. ;-)

Answer 20

Strong women are adorable, cute and s**y.  Add intelligence to that and wow!  ;p  Controlling women are too stifling.  Not too many humans like to be controlled.  

Please keep the whips & hurting others to yourself.  I've been beat up enough in life & don't enjoy that.  However I do like other games...!    :D  

Answer 21

Bitchen!