If someone did this and u didnt, is it considered rude??? please help me! this is a very serious matter?

Question

i have a cousin in india who works in a bank. when he came to the usa this year, he arrived may 23rd and arrived back in india on june 25th. he came to the usa last year by himself to visit america and to take a course. when he called us in feb 07, my mom persuaded him to visit California, but due to his busy schedule he was unable to come. when i went there to visit him, i spent three days with him before he went back to india then he persuaded me to visit india. i ended up getting my driver's licence last year and needed time to look for a car. since i couldnt go to india last year, my cousin made another trip to america this year with his wife and 2 sons and came to visit me for five days. he was in new york for three weeks. when he came to california, he took a 7 am direct flight from new york to california and arrived around 10 am pst. when we got home from the airport, the very first question he asked me was what i am doing nowadays that i am busy all the time. when i told him, he could tell i was making excuses. that made me realize that he really wanted to spend time with me but hates it when i make excuses. when he went back to india, he flew directly from California. they took a 8:40 pm flight. when they had several flights to choose from. after they left, it sort of made me realize that they planned their program this way because they wanted to spend time with me and wanted me to remember them. please tell me your honest opinion about this. if ur cousin from india did this and u didnt make an effort to visit india, would u be showing respect and would it be rude to keep saying ur busy when ur really not? to tell you the truth, when my dad wants me to visit him, then my mom is after me to visit him but when my family in india wants me to visit, i cant go and that's not fair then other people's feelings get hurt. am i right or wrong? should i make an attempt to visit india? end of july, my mom's sister to came to visit and they're going back on wednesday. when they came, the first question my uncle asked me was when i am coming to india and he asked me several times. my mom told my cousin last year i can come during my vacation then my mom told his wife the same thing and i have been telling everyone the same thing. my mom told my cousin last year we'll be coming to india in december of 2008. when i asked my mom if we are going, she said no then i told her that she told everyone i can come during my vacations then she kept quiet. and called me a crazy girl. am i really going crazy? honestly believe i will never get a chance to explore the world. all my life will be is going to my dad's for every vacation and get stuck working in a community center. isnt it rude that if my cousin and his family then my mom's sister and brother-in-law all made an effort to come visit me during my vacation, shouldnt i do the same? please help me out and provide me with ONLY REASONABLE ANSWERS.

Answer 1

Well, be honest, and tell them that you're still a kid, and your mom makes the decisions for you, and you're not the one dishing out the dough for the ticket to India, and unless you get one you can't really come, and since you're mom isn't giving you the ticket, and making excuses for not giving you the ticket, when you'll get an opportunity to have a ticket to India in your hand, you'll definitely be looking foward to the visit to India.

Answer 2

Everyone's schedule these days seems to be extremely hectic and when family makes time and effort to see you, you should be grateful that they want you to be a part of their time. If you aren't comfortable with going, I would seriously ask you to think about why. If it is just because you don't want to, try to think about it in a different manner. If you would like to go and parents are making the decisions for you, first express your wishes, calmly , to your parents and if they still wish you don't go, explain this to your family abroad. Let them know it isn't that you don't want to go and spend time with them, just that you aren't able to at this time.

Answer 3

That is tough. However, it is your decision. If you want to spend time in India/with your cousin, go for it! Take it from a guy who has been to India twice, and whose parents are fully Indian. Even if you don't like India, you should have fun spending your time with your cousin.  

Answer 4

idk it really deponds on how u are