If someone you care about drinks alot...?

Question

...but is in complete denial about it, should you leave them alone or do something about it?

Answer 1

I'd suggest doing something about it. It's going to be a lot of work but if the person means something to you---you should stop at nothing.

Answer 2

do something about it.

Answer 3

It really depends on if they are in a position where they drink and drive or go to work or school after drinking, or something that could threaten their lives or other people's lives. Of course drinking hurts you physically after a while, but if they are in denial or that is what they want to do, that is what they are going to do.

You know the situation, so you have to think about how extreme it is.

Please don't have an intervention. If you put someone in that position, which is a surprise and embarrassing, they are going to say what you want to hear, or go the other direction and probably go out and drink because they are mad. They have to be the ones that want to stop...really want it.

Best Wishes

Answer 4

intervention

Answer 5

It comes down to perspective.  "A lot" to you might be different than "a lot" to the drinker.  But if you're friends, bring it up.  It only shows you care.  If you aren't friends, then I'd say it isn't your business.

Answer 6

REHAB

Answer 7

DO SOMETHING ABOUT IT.  My boyfriend got like that... He was a casual drinker when I met him and he was great, then he lost his job and started drinking more and more until he was drinking from the time he woke up to the time he passed out whenever that was.  I KNEW he needed help and since I fell in love with him before he was an alcoholic I couldn't leave him even though everyone told me to.  Eventually he was hospitalized for 4 days because he'd gotten Pancreatitis and wasn't eating anything and was throwing everything up including water and was STILL drinking.  He had the worst alcohol withdrawl symptoms (delirum tremens) - VERY SCARY... and he was only 25!!! ...but he pulled through.  If it weren't for me forcing him to get help the doctors said he would have died.  Now he's 27, doesn't drink, and he's the perfect fiance!  Get your friend help.

Answer 8

You should let them know how much you care about them and offer to help them get in touch with people who can help them. You can't really help them, and you need to let them know you will not support their drinking and other self destructive habits (take keys away from drunk drivers, pour out bottles)...

Answer 9

You better do something about it before its an even bigger problem!!

Answer 10

i would try and do something about it. its kind of a scary thing in a way cuz alcoholics seem to put alcohol first alot of the time. if that person drinks alooot, take a mental note on things they do when drinking that are stupid, or risky. observe how the drinking affects others/you and make a mental note on it. all the little things or big things u see that aren't right-- tell that person this is what u think about the problem. atleast u are giving an opportunity for them to see that they have a problem, which would be a huge step. i dont know if u want this person to quit or just cut down alot on it. for some people though, like me, i couldnt cut down-- i had to quit cuz once i had one or two drinks i had a really hard time stopping until i was drunk. people need motivation to quit-- like -- DUI, paying for lawyers/court, loss of friends/children, awareness on the real health problems, more money in pocket if they quit. im not sure how far into this u would go--i mean it shouldn't hurt if u ask them to take alcohol classes. odds are that won't happen until they see they have a problem. so it might be the proper thing just to push it a little. it shows u care. maybe tell them them things "that motivate them" every now and then. or u could buy those little books that talk about addiction- like a daily one that they can read a page a day for each day of the year. they have them at AA or some online that are good that have nothing to do with the 12 steps/AA. maybe they might just read that when nobody is around-- like right before bed or when its quiet and they are bored. i hope u atleast try something, but i would back down for awhile if things get iffy. people just get mean sometimes over issues like this. good luck. maybe call a hotline- might have advice. or check online for a book about someone in your situation. have a good day.

Answer 11

Is it really possible to leave him alone? Like a friend? Or do you have family connections which will continue for life?

In any case, overcoming denial would be harder than overcoming the drinking problem. If it is a he, tell him it might make him impotent. If it is a she, tell her she will get ugly in time.

I really don't know what else to do than touch his/her sore spot.

Answer 12

sometimes they have to realize it themselves

sometimes they need an intervention.

not black and white... many varying shades of grey here

Answer 13

Boy am I glad I found this question. I'm dating a guy who drinks a lot, and he's in total denial of his drinking habits. Yelling at someone and telling them, "Stop dinking!" never works. I don't know why. Instead, I tell him how ridiculous it makes him act, and how it affects us financially. I actually do psychodrama so can see how he acts when he's drunk. He got embarrassed. When he asked if we wanted to go out to dinner, I said, "No, cause I don't want to spend $50.00 on drinks alone. That's ridiculous to me." I'd rather spend that kind of money on something else, not poison.

So now when we got out he pays for the bill and I don't have to worry about the bill

I started going to Al-Anon and didn't even tell him. He was shocked, as if a light bulb went off in his head.

My advice is don't come at his drinking problem at a direct angle.

Do what YOU need to do to keep yourself sane and so you can know how to react when he drinks. Don't worry about him. He has to realize he has a problem

Answer 14

well it could develop into alcoholism and that isn't only self destructive but destroys everyone around them.  Therefore I suggest to do something abou t*t.

Answer 15

The only person who can "do something about it" is the one who is drinking.  You may be able to bring it to his/her attention, but generally, problem drinkers have to hit bottom before they will do anything about it.  I'd suggest an Al-Anon group for you.  Al-Anon is a group of people who are friends or family of alcoholics.  They meet together to find ways to help themselves become whole, because most people whose lives are touched by an alcoholic have some issues they need help with too.  Good luck!

Answer 16

I tried it, and now I just drink with him.