If this is 'home'... why complain?

Question

I know a lot of people from different countries who have moved to UK for one reason or another. However, when we get chatting, I find that when the word 'home' is mentioned, no matter whether they have moved here from India, Jamaica, Ireland, America, Japan, Thailand, or wherever, they start getting dreamy eyed and saying that 'home' (where they came from) is far better than this country and start telling you about all their fond memories?? If it was that good, why did they move here (and I have raised this plenty of times - WITHOUT being called racist, I am the least racist/sexist or anythingist person I know!) More often than not, the answer (as I won't let it drop until I get one!) is comes down to 'I wouldn't really want to go back.'

What is it with the word 'home' that makes people, who no longer live there go bleary eyed and think it is something it is not? And is everyone the same?

:)

Answer 1

People seem to like to complain. I'm guessing that you have never left home for some place else. It seems normal to me to have some nostalgia for the place where you spent some time. Their home is familiar to them. My relatives that came to the U.S. from Lebanon never talked about wanting to go back, especially my grandmother but she was born here. They left because of the muslims and the violence.

I moved down south because I didn't like the north. I still missed the north and moved back here. There is no perfect place. I grew up in the north. It is familiar to me and I have a lot of good memories here. The good usually outweighs the bad. I think if the bad outweighs than the good then people will be less likely to be nostalgic.  

Answer 2

they miss their families..

Answer 3

We tend to remember good memories first, so when people think about where they've come from, they're more likely to reminice than to be objective. Also, as you say, they are thinking about the good things that they're missing (food, weather), which is what always happens when you get homesick, even if you're in a place that's better overall.

It could also be that they moved to Britain for reasons such as money or opportunities, even if, all things being equal, they'd have preferred to stay at home. And I do think everyone is the same to a degree - even if there's somewhere in the world you've always dreamed of living, you'll always get pangs of home-sickness.

Answer 4

Because although they may have good memories, they just might not want to go back! My dad grew up in Nigeria & they were the best days of his life so he always talks about his good times there. But if anyone asks if he'd want to go back he'd say gosh no! Simply because the weather is too hot & things aren't as good (when it comes to work/money etc...) back there as they are in England. He's not in love with England (which is unsuprising due to stupid laws, expensive taxing & all that other stuff) but he'd rather stay here than go back.  

Answer 5

Because no matter where you go, for a lot of people where they grew up is still home. It's sort of like a form of nostalgia. My parents have fond memories of the UK (and so do I) but I know they never want to move back there.

Answer 6

It's human nature to forget about the reasons why one emigrated.

Not to mention highly immature.  I chose Oregon because of it's weather.  There are times I'd prefer to not get soaked whilst bike riding.  But all in all, I'll stay here.

Now any idiot who tries to change their new homeland into a reflection of their original home needs a good thrashing. Whether they be a Pro-Sales Tax Californian, or a Sharia loving Muslim.

Answer 7

People like to complain and also convince themselves that something isn't like it is at home. They do the same here in the U.S. But most of the time, it is the memories (good ones) that make them look back fondly. It must be hard to pick up and move to another country. But for those that just simply want to complain and criticize, they need to go back home.