If you dont get attention from your spouse, would you looking for someone else out there..?

Question

thks.. you opinion plz..

Answer 1

No.

I would talk to my spouse about it and then if he's not willing to hold up his part of the vows he took when he married me than I would divorce him and then find another man.

Answer 2

Been there...i did end up finding it somewhere else too...it was a bad ordeal, really...basically, my b/f forgave me and was an a$$ and the guy i actually did that with was nice and half-way lead me on...think pretty hard before you do it, if you were planning to

Answer 3

no I have what is called personal integrety......if I wasnt getting what I needed from my spouse I would tell him....and if he was unwilling to meet my needs I would rethink the relationship....not begin a new one without finishing the old one :  )

Answer 4

i havent but she cant say the same u heard

Answer 5

yes..definately.....lifes tooooooooooo short...

Answer 6

that is why friends are made for, when you don't get attention from husband come to your friend here.

I am waiting...

Answer 7

Not sure why.............  but if your not receiving any attention from your spouse,   talk it out with your husband...........and tell him, if you don't get it from him, you'll get it elsewhere, which means,  leading towards DIVORCE............  ALIMONY................CHILD SUPPORT.............. SPOUSAL SUPPORT.    I think he'll come around, but Please, do not cheat........just get out of the bad marriage...........  

Answer 8

It sounds as though you are not happy in your relationship any more.  I can say that mine is starting to be the same way, and I often times look to the internet to find someone to talk to.  There is nobody who is judging you, and it might turn out that you may meet some interesting people.  I think it is very healthy to get your felling out in the open, and even though the people you talk with on the internet don't know you, they might have a good tidbit of advice that may help.

Answer 9

it would definitely cross my mind because I feel bitter and resentful towards my spouse if he didn't show me any love. But in the end, i wouldn't do it because i'd talk to my husband about the problem and try to see if we can compromise on working things out.

but thats just me because i'm pretty loyal and I want my marriage to work out. most people don't take marriage seriously, but i sure do.

Answer 10

NO.  Although, I may be biased.  I have a very strong and secure relationship and we've been going strong for almost 9 years, no kids (and I'm happier for it), and we've never onced cheated on each other- although, we'd have no reason to...

Anyway- don't do it!  However!!!  If you leave your current spouse, and THEN find someone:  GO FOR IT!  8D

I'm sorry, but you'll regret it.  There's a reason why you're with your spouse, right?  You have to love them or you wouldn't be there.  Even if they're cheating on you, leave them before you start seeing or sleeping with someone else.  Don't take that kind of bull from anyone.  

I'm a very needy person (as in materialistic and needing people to do chores for me or entertain me, not people wise) and have been told by everyone who's ever known me that I'm spoiled and perhaps high maintenance, but I'm like that because I demand it from the people around me.  To get what you want, you have to be selfish sometimes, but there's a line you do not cross.  You're trying to get attention, which I get, everyone needs attention and to be spoiled at times, but cheating is not being spoiled, but degrading yourself and your values, and ruining your relationship.

I had a friend, who was married for forever, and he husband had cheated on her, but for years, she put up with it and gained weight.  Then finally, she lost the weight, boosted her self-confidence, and cheated on him with a guy for over a year, and even got pregnant, but wasn't sure who the father was, so she secretly got an abortion and told her Husband she lost the baby that she "didn't" know she was carrying.  Fast forward to present time, her and her Husband are doing better.  However, she regrets ever cheating on her Husband at all because she cries all the time thinking about what she's done to him and it'll always in her mind and in the end, she realized it wasn't worth breaking up their marriage, so she left the other guy (who she actually fell in love with) and went back to her Husband because of their history and stability.

*sigh*  I really feel strongly against you trying to get attention else where while you're still with your spouse, and if you don't love your spouse but are "forced" to be with him (don't kid yourself), you need to either suck it up and deal with it and change how things are yourself, or leave him.

However, this is just my advice, and you can do whatever you want, but you wanted advice and opinions, so I'm throwing it out at you.  Either way, good luck!

Answer 11

there is always a reason !!!!!

try counselling .....but you must both want to go

good luck  

Answer 12

If I don't get attention I ask him whats up or assume that he's got things on his mind and give him extra attention. No, I wouldn't go looking for someone else.  

Answer 13

Yes, but I find that every time I find someone attractive I keep thinking about my wife and can't get my mind off of her so then my energy level goes down and it shows so then i can't get anywhere.  So instead, I look at more p**n then there are books in the library of congress, and I wack off for hours and hours after my wife goes to bed.  I still have dreams about my wife, and I pray that one day soon she'll either call me to bed early or wake me up with a BJ.  But until that happens, i'm engrossed in the congress of p**n.  

Answer 14

I was in that situation. My husband was not paying any attention to me. He work for over 10 hours a day and when he came home would go straight to bed. I knew he was not out messing around. I however was very lonely and sad. We had moved to a new town and I knew no one. I made a few friends at work and we hung out. Well one time while we were hanging out things went to far. I had an affair for about 3 months. I should have talked to him about it first and I didn't. That was the biggest mistake EVER! After I told him the truth, things were bad between us, I had to quite my job and we moved out of state. 4 years later we are doing great. We TALK to each other and make "us" a priority. If you both aren't willing to change then nothing good will come of it. I have to look at my husband everyday and I think about how much I hurt him. That kills me inside.

PLEASE PLEASE talk to him and let them know how you feel . I don't want any one to ever have to go threw that! I hope I have helped. If you need to chat feel free to e-mail me. [e-mail].

Answer 15

NO, don't be a cheater and stay true to your martital vows.  There is always masterbation.

Answer 16

Never, even though I wouldn't be getting the attention it wouldn't mean that we still didn't love each other.  Even if love wasn't there I still wouldn't until we decided that we were getting divorced and one of us had moved out.  When I make a commitment I make a commitment and that is that.  

Answer 17

While some people frown on that and feel you marry for better or for worse, I don't think anyone should ever have to feel they are being neglected.  It would be natural to start looking elsewhere.  Everyone needs affection of some sort.  Trust me...being in an attentionless marriage is very empty.  

Answer 18

Talk to him first!

Answer 19

I would not but some people do.

Answer 20

ask him to be more attentive first, if things don't change leave him and then find it elsewhere.

Answer 21

Seen it happen many times. After years of not enough affection from husbands, wives leave and go looking for what they think they are missing out on.  Usually ends in divorce and the kids lives are turned upside down, for they are the ones who truly suffer.

If you are not getting what you want out of your relationship then ask for what you want.

Answer 22

It happened to me, but I was not looking for it per se.

My ex husband became cold and distant to me so I was spending more time with a group of friends from work and somehow I managed to fall for (of course) one of the ugliest guys in the bunch, well duh, because he gave me attention and was sweet.

I left my ex because I knew it was dead, I gave him plenty of warnings though and over six months his actions showed me he did not care if I left.  So I did.

Sigh....tell your husband, AT LEAST give him a chance to stand up and be your lover.

Answer 23

NO, certainly not!