If you gained weight, and your partner asked you to do something about it, would you get offended?

Question

I wouldn't necessarily be offended, I would probably take it as a sign that he thought something was lacking in the relationship. I'd rather him ask me to do something about it, than go out and cheat and use "you got fat" as an excuse.

Answer 1

No, I wouldn't be offended; he wouldn't have said anything unless it was a noticeable amount of weight, and if it was a noticeable amount I would have already known it myself. I'm well-aware of how much weight I've gained in the last few years.

Answer 2

It would all depend on how he said it and when he said it.  

Answer 3

Does he want you to do something about it only for him or does he think you're not happy with the way you look and feel?  That's the question.

No matter what if you weren't that size when you were married it does make a difference, because you're not the woman he married.  That also depends on how much weight you gained.  If it was 10 no problem, but if it was 50 that's a major problem and it would and should affect any relationship.

Your husband should have a say in this because your his wife, but he has to be understanding and try and help you.  Make sure he knows that he can never be selfish and put you down in anyway.

Answer 4

why be offended about it, he did not say you had to lose the weight, he said do something about it, perhaps you could just preform oral s*x more often. That should smooth things over.

Answer 5

No my partner and I can talk about anything....  However he would never do that I have gained 40 pounds in the last 3 years when I say something about it he says he does not see it...

Answer 6

I agree w/ teenie.  If you're overweight you already know it.  No need to be reminded about it.  That will only make you feel worse.  Instead of them telling you you're overweight & to do something about it maybe they should ask if you would like to go jogging with them or ask if you want some help.  Like maybe diet together or something.  I need to drop about 25 pounds & I would love it if my husband offered to help keep me motivated & maybe join me instead of just complain about it.  

Answer 7

I won't because I know my husband and I know he'd love me anyway b ut he cares about me, that's why he's asking about.

Answer 8

Yeah I would be offended!

Answer 9

Yes and no. It would really depend on how he approached me about it. If I was in shape when we first got together and then just completely let myself go, (especially if he was making an effort to stay in shape) then I don't think he's out of line for making a request like that. I know my fiance loves me no matter what but I think it would be unfair to him if I gained a lot of wait and never did anything about it. That's like telling him that I don''t care about taking care of myself and looking nice for him and staying healthy. On the other hand, if a woman gains weight, say, because she just had a baby and he was demanding that she loose weight, or if he was being mean about it, well, I think that's wrong.  

Answer 10

I'd probably be hurt but I would rather know than be ignorant of the fact that he thinks I'm fat. Of course it's painful but it certainly doesn't mean something is lacking in the relationship.

Answer 11

If you feel good about yourself I would believe you have good confidence. Don't take it as a him finding fault but talking to you openly.

Answer 12

I'd definitely be offended, but then I'd definitely do something about it too.

Answer 13

When you are in a relationship, you should do your part to keep it vibrant and alive. This is why most relationships fail, because of neglect, including people letting their appearance go. I would be evaluating my self awareness if the issue had gotten so far that I made my partner point it out.

Answer 14

I used to get offended because I wanted him to be so 100% into me, but I realize HOW visual he is and how much a s**y rather than fluffy body reeaaaaly turns him on. Its a serious thing for him and you are right, you want to go ahead and do something (EFFECTIVE) about it to prevent any resultant problems.

Answer 15

You know if your over weight and if your husband says something about your weight you do get upset because you don't need to be reminded that you need to lose weight.

Answer 16

Yes, it would be offensive.  But I know better, so I stay in shape and no discussion is needed.

Have I ever said anything to my wife?  Nope.  Do I wish she would do something about it?  Yup.

Answer 17

Yes. He should love me no matter  how I look.

Answer 18

It depends on how much weight I gained. If I gained 10 pounds then I would be offended. If I gained 30 pounds I couldn't blame him for saying something.  

Answer 19

I would only get upset if he was a fat lazy b*****d laying on his butt pointing his fat finger at me. That would offend me for sure. It's one thing to tell someone they need to lose weight for health reasons, but for any other reason it's just plain shallow and rude.