If you had a friend who was a crackhead...?

Question

or not just a friend, a roommate, at what point do you have to tell that person to get out because they're not just hurting themself through their addiction? I'm struggling because I don't want to see my friend out on the streets or dead, but I'm an alcoholic in recovery, and I can't risk my own recovery to help her. She has smoked crack in my home twice, I have paid for her drugs once, to keep her from having to sell herself for them. I don't want to throw her out, but I can't risk throwing my own life away as well, or getting so caught up in this, that I wind up destroyed if she can't get through it and winds up dead. Any suggestions????

Answer 1

I Felt You're Pain So Much I Had To Respond.  I Got That Loud And Clear.

You Love Her And Want Her Be To Healthy And Well.

You're At That Point Now Because You're Struggling And Worried.

What Do You Do Now?

I Called Some Crisis Intervention Lines To Find Out Options.

Get To The County Clerk And File Paperwork To Get Her Into Court Ordered Treatment.  Time Frame: Unknown, Best Chance For Her If The Time Works Out.

Wait Until She's High And Call The Police.  That Would Be The Fast And Easy Way.  I Can't Tell You How Many Ways That Could Go Wrong.  You Might End Up In Trouble For Example.  I Don't Know.  Wish I Did. Jail Time Isn't Going To Help Anyone.

Wait Till She Has An Emergency, Call 911.  That Will Force The Issue Of Treatment.  Not A Good Option But, Beats Nothing.

Toss Her Out.  At Least You Can Get Along With Your Life.  You're Not Going To Like That. You Would Be Guilt Ridden For God Knows How Long.

None Of These Are Going To Sit Well With Her, Or You For That Matter, At Least For Now.  Maybe That Doesn't Matter In The Greater Scheme Of Things.  Saving SomeonesLife May Be All The Reward You Will Ever Get Out Of This.  You May Well Save Your Own.  You May Also Save Both Of You.  It's Hard To Find A Better Reason Than That.

My Read On This Is That You're Strong Enough To Do What Has To Done For Both Of You Now.  I Know You Can.  You Need To Know That Too.  You Also Know That You Can't Hold Up For Much Longer.  You Need To Act Now Before You Can't Even If It Means You're Going To Take A Dive Temporarily.

The Bad Is That Nothing In Your Present Situation Is Easy.  The Good; You Have The Chance To Profoundly Change One Or More Lives For The Better.  There's Always A Reason Why We Are Faced With Challenges.

Things Will Definitely Change Between The Two Of You.  The Outcome Is Unpredictable.  Right Now, It Doesn't Matter.  Time Will Tell.  Remember That There Is Always A Plan For All Of Us. Have Faith In That.

What Would I Do?

Call A Psychiatric Hot line.  Discuss.  Plan.

Call A Crisis Intervention Line.  Discuss.  Plan.

Get My Butt Down To The County Clerk If I Had To Because The Above Didn't Go Well.

Cobalt Is Spot On With The "be there when she falls, but Don't allow yourself to fall with her."

I Wish I Could Be A Support Group For You Both But, I Can't.  You Can Email Me Here At Yahoo And I Will Do Whatever I Can.

Wishing You Both Well

Answer 2

Why don't you try signing her up for rehab? Actually, why don't you guys both go to rehab? For moral support - going with a friend is always much better than being alone.

Sorry for the lack of a better answer. I'd be stumped if I were you, too. Good luck with everything!  

Answer 3

it sounds like you are in a pickle, the best advice i can give you would be to go seek professional help.

Answer 4

First off I think congratulations for getting sobar!

Secondly, you need to continue to put yourself first.

She needs to want to get clean, as you would know, before it can happen.  You can only try and guide her down the right path, what she does after that is out of your hands.

A good friend will be there when she needs her, but no-one can hold you responsible for her actions.

Take care of you, and be there when she falls, but dont allow yourself to fall with her.

Good luck with your life and continuing sobriety.

Best wishes

xx